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No desire to speak

13K views 38 replies 32 participants last post by  maniuni 
#1 ·
Hi :) I may be wrong about it being a secondary disorder but does anyone overhere feel no particular desire to talk? I cultivate the dream of meeting a friend kind of 'alter ego' with whom silence wouldn't be uncomfortable, and with whom i could go to the movies, listen to music, hang out in a park or travel to different places... Anyone can relate?
 
#29 · (Edited)
That sounds a lot like me. Conversations, especially small talk, tire me relentlessly. There's this girl in my class who yacks off every second and people are mesmerized by her. Basically she goes on and on about NOTHING. It's bizarre! And everyone likes talking to her.

And I would love to have a friend who is comfortable with my silence. That would make me the happiest girl on earth. I'm always worried about boring the other person so I think frantically and usually don't come up with anything else to say. =\
 
#37 ·
You sound so much like me. Wish I could be your friend. I don't talk much, either. And when I do, it's only when I'm comfortable. Which is not very frequent at all.

In class, I don't want to talk to anyone. I get by through the day with very short conversations, and that only happens if someone talks to me about something. My classmates are very boisterous, and always laughing constantly. It doesn't irritate me, but I wish they could be a little quieter. They never shut up, basically.
 
#32 ·
Can definitely relate, the bad part is that with my job I have to deal with people constantly. I work in a factory that is just full of the most crass individuals you can imagine. Every conversation is about sex, every other word is and F-Bomb...just constant inane bull****.

I really don't understand what motivates these people to talk about such meaningless stuff all day.
 
#34 ·
I really don't understand what motivates these people to talk about such meaningless stuff all day.
This is so true...most of the things people talk about don't interest me, unless they have interesting life stories. I get bored of people easily, especially those that I see at work all the time. I feel like I have them figured out (I am very analytical) and they just don't interest me anymore. A lot of the time, socializing isn't rewarding to me either and I hate small talk. I just find I get bored easily. This wasn't the case with my previous job so I think the type of work environment you're in has something to do with it as well. One you're in it long enough, you start to change and believe that this is the new "you."
 
#33 ·
I can relate i've spent thousands of days where I had no one around to talk to so I've gotten SO use to never talking..
 
#35 ·
Lately this is exactly what I have been looking for in a relationship. I just want someone I can be myself around. Some of my best friends are good at letting silence be, especially when we're all tired and have nothing good to say anyway.

Other people often have so much energy, and I just can't keep up. They want to hang out three days a week or something, and go out and spend money on restaurants and events and such, and that stuff is fun every once in a while, but I just wish everyone would slow down and relax, and for once enjoy the little things and not get all uptight if they aren't doing something incredible every second of their life. These people LITERALLY need to just stop and smell the flowers.
 
#36 ·
That's when you know you've found somebody really special. When you can just shut the **** up for a minute and comfortably share a silence.

But yeah, i really don't like talking, I don't see the point of me talking, and i don't ever have anything to talk about. I don't enjoy it when people ask questions about me. Cause I never know what to say. I'd love to just have a friend or something who i can just enjoy being around without needing to talk.
 
#39 ·
I stumbled on this thread while I was looking for this subject.
I am feeling down because I feel I am not meeting my own expectation for me as a person. Because I have no friends and I am staying at home every weekend and mostly watch movies. My neighbours are having guests and parties all the time which makes me feel even more isolated and like I am weird.
But when I think about calling someone from work, for example, I find I have very little desire. It just seems so draining, even when imagining it. I don't see any value in talking to people. I can manage to do it for a time if I have to but soon I run out of things to say or ask and get anxious and even panicky because I think the person is already bored with me. I even imagine she is trying to get out of the conversation.

So, I hate myself for not being a more sociable person but don't have desire to talk to anyone. It's depressing. I can't even talk to my mother anymore. Usually she is talking and I am asking for details but when she doesn't talk, I can't think of things to say.
 
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