It's very true - I can't deny I'm fuelled by fear more than anything else. Whenever a doctor mentions going on yet another drug I immediately tense up and politely decline. Previous doctors that I did take prescriptions from abused it (one, a well respected one, even admitted she thought of me as a guinea pig!) and I'm pretty upset about being on Clonazepam still, 10 years later. At 16 I was only concerned about the good it could do and trusted the doctors to know the risks and monitor me, not to mention wean me off when I was in a good spot. So now I focus on anything but the good it could do (as none but Clonazepam were worth it) as I don't feel I can trust the professionals to do their job.
Then, of course, there are the countless drugs that I was put on, each causing me to be so physically sick I practically lived in my bathroom for a month. So I guess it's a mix of mistrust and fear of reliving what I experienced those years ago. This doctor is very new to me, I've only met with her four times now and so I've yet to put my trust in her. It's funny to think I went from one polar end to the other.
I'll try it...mostly because I now know there are people on here to speak to (well, you) about it.