Social Anxiety Support

Daxter · 11-03-2009, 07:54 PM

Or it may have already ended.

I am quite sure I had SA just 6 months ago. I was afraid to make contact with new people. I had trouble keeping up conversations, often looking for words, sentences, anything to say, always subjecting them to some kind of delusional correction system so I don't offend, anger the person I'm talking to or make a fool of myself. I was paranoid about people watching me on trains. I turned red plenty of times, had sweaty palms, and shaky hands. I did strange things, and often wondered to myself just seconds afterwards why I made the wrong choice. My life was filled with emberassments. I was always looking back, wondering what people think of me, not taking in mind that most people after a while probably don't give a damn and forget

To some extent, all of the above mentioned anxieties still exist, but they are small, and perhaps even normal for the 'average joe'. I have a couple of friends, not a lot, but I don't feel like conforming to the idiotic and unsympathetic thought and appearance pattern most people of my age follow. I don't care as much about people watching me. Bad hairdays, which I have EVERY DAY, bother me, but not enough to stop me from going outside anyway. I'm still a bit of an outcast nerd, but I'm not afraid to be out there. Sometimes I don't understand some pretty basic social situations, but I think that's more lack of experience than anxiety. I turn red every so often. And I have trouble going up to SOME people. But I think it's very mild and it's not stopping me from completing my study or having social contact.

Despite my advancements, I don't really feel like leaving yet. This place makes me feel comfortable, in spite of all the depression floating around. But yeah, if I one day can safely say I don't give a damn what people think of me, socialise easily, have a girlfriend, and go outside whenever I damn well please, I will try to help my fellow SA-inflicted man achieve such luxuries.

Now I don't know...

Prakas · 11-03-2009, 09:56 PM

Sounds like your improving and getting confident. Congratulations, keep it up

Don't leave us though!

Fuzzy Logic · 11-04-2009, 03:57 AM

Congratulations.

mind_games · 11-04-2009, 06:07 AM

Well done

What do you attribute this improvement to?

Lisa · 11-04-2009, 06:48 AM

Congrats

Daxter · 11-05-2009, 05:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mind_games

Well done

What do you attribute this improvement to?

Ironically, cynicism. I stopped caring about a lot of things. Why should I care what some random schmuck on the street thinks of me? Or my friends for that matter? Why do I care? I am who I am. I've really started to question judging small, trivial things. When a person walks funny, I do laugh, but I never laugh at the person. So what? Person walks funny. Laugh, big deal. Person's said a stupid thing. Yeah, that was quite idiotic. Next day you see this person again, everything should be fine. Whatever. That's how I think, and these situations apply to myself aswell.

''Whatever.'' I don't express it in order to not stir up a fight, but I look at many things and simply think... ''Screw that.'' Prefer to use the f-word, but I'm not allowed here for some stupid reason.

I believe strongly in this philosophy, but I'm not consistent with it. I still care about my hair, for instance. Sounds funny maybe from a guy, but yeah, I care about how my hair looks. It's rubbish. And I hate people looking at me funny because of it.

This doesn't mean I'm a mean... guy (which cursewords CAN I use anyway?). I try to act as nice as possible. And if that's not good enough, please die, random imaginary person for the sake of argument.

I can still improve.

bwidger85 · 11-05-2009, 06:51 AM

I think no matter how much we feel we improve (SA or no SA) we will always be somewhat self-conscious. As long as you feel you can do the things you want to do then I see no reason why you wouldn't have SA. Good for you!

TomB · 11-12-2009, 05:43 PM

i agree, for me comes and goes and sometimes I spend way to much time in denial. its here one day, then not for a long time and then i realize how guarded i still am and dont venture out for to many new places or things to often. i do hope you are at the end, but if not dont beat yourself up.....for me it always kinda lingers. acceptance is truly the answer these days.

11-03-2009, 07:54 PM	#1 (permalink)
Daxter Status: Free Speech Advocate Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Getting closer to an SA-less life Gender: Male Posts: 211	I think I may be reaching the end of my SA Or it may have already ended. I am quite sure I had SA just 6 months ago. I was afraid to make contact with new people. I had trouble keeping up conversations, often looking for words, sentences, anything to say, always subjecting them to some kind of delusional correction system so I don't offend, anger the person I'm talking to or make a fool of myself. I was paranoid about people watching me on trains. I turned red plenty of times, had sweaty palms, and shaky hands. I did strange things, and often wondered to myself just seconds afterwards why I made the wrong choice. My life was filled with emberassments. I was always looking back, wondering what people think of me, not taking in mind that most people after a while probably don't give a damn and forget To some extent, all of the above mentioned anxieties still exist, but they are small, and perhaps even normal for the 'average joe'. I have a couple of friends, not a lot, but I don't feel like conforming to the idiotic and unsympathetic thought and appearance pattern most people of my age follow. I don't care as much about people watching me. Bad hairdays, which I have EVERY DAY, bother me, but not enough to stop me from going outside anyway. I'm still a bit of an outcast nerd, but I'm not afraid to be out there. Sometimes I don't understand some pretty basic social situations, but I think that's more lack of experience than anxiety. I turn red every so often. And I have trouble going up to SOME people. But I think it's very mild and it's not stopping me from completing my study or having social contact. Despite my advancements, I don't really feel like leaving yet. This place makes me feel comfortable, in spite of all the depression floating around. But yeah, if I one day can safely say I don't give a damn what people think of me, socialise easily, have a girlfriend, and go outside whenever I damn well please, I will try to help my fellow SA-inflicted man achieve such luxuries. Now I don't know... __________________ ...without love, without anger, without sorrow, breath is just a clock... ticking.

11-04-2009, 03:57 AM	#3 (permalink)
Fuzzy Logic Status: SAS Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: United Kingdom, Northern Ireland Gender: Male Age: 23 Posts: 307	Congratulations. __________________ “There is but a thin line between madness and genius. I have been trying valiantly to cross it, but I don’t think I’m mad enough yet.”

11-04-2009, 06:07 AM	#4 (permalink)
mind_games Status: dances, like a fridge Join Date: Nov 2008 Age: 23 Posts: 1,568	Well done What do you attribute this improvement to? __________________ "this is not me, this is me reacting to your perception of me"

11-05-2009, 06:51 AM	#7 (permalink)
bwidger85 Status: SAS Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Ohio Gender: Male Age: 24 Posts: 702	I think no matter how much we feel we improve (SA or no SA) we will always be somewhat self-conscious. As long as you feel you can do the things you want to do then I see no reason why you wouldn't have SA. Good for you! __________________ Album #3 (download my complete third album as it is right now!)

11-12-2009, 05:43 PM	#8 (permalink)
TomB Status: SAS Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Tennessee Gender: Male Age: 38 Posts: 156	i agree, for me comes and goes and sometimes I spend way to much time in denial. its here one day, then not for a long time and then i realize how guarded i still am and dont venture out for to many new places or things to often. i do hope you are at the end, but if not dont beat yourself up.....for me it always kinda lingers. acceptance is truly the answer these days. __________________ When the desire for the future, grows stronger than the memories of the past, we begin to grow.

11-03-2009, 09:56 PM	#2 (permalink)
Prakas Status: Failure - Life Sucks Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Delaware Gender: Male Age: 21 Posts: 425	Sounds like your improving and getting confident. Congratulations, keep it up Don't leave us though!

11-04-2009, 06:48 AM	#5 (permalink)
Lisa Status: Missing her friends!!!!!! Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Britain Posts: 2,067	Congrats