I spoke at my grandfather's memorial

[R91]

My grandfather passed away three days ago and since then, things have been pretty crazy. Today was his final memorial service and my dad had asked me and my sisters to talk for a few minutes in front of everyone about his life etc. There were about 40 people.

This is what I wrote/read:

My grandpa was proud of me from the day I was born. He started to have spiritual and religious discussions with me when I was 14 years old and it never stopped. He used to call me 'the philosopher' and 'the professor' and once, when he was having a gathering in this very house, he decided to post my exam results on a huuugee board and put it right near the entrance so everyone would have to look at it. He even called my school and told them that they should do a newspaper article on me because of my results. Of course, I had absolutely no idea about any of this until they told me, and yes, I was thoroughly embarrassed.

His words will never die as he has passed them to me and I will pass them to others. I know that he will always be proud of me no matter what I do with my life and he will always be in my heart. During his last weeks I told him that I got into the university that I wanted to go to. Although he couldn't speak, I am sure I saw him smiling at me and I knew the man that I loved was still there and still strong. I'm sure that he is in a better place at the moment, having a debate with his God on the importance of believing in a higher power. A power that is greater than all of us combined, and a power that he will now witness every single day.

And ****ing hell, I was shaking as I read that, but then I just thought of my grandfather and I made eye contact with the people there and what I said seemed to really touch a few of them (gauging by tears). Many of them came up to me afterwards to tell me how much they liked it. And considering I'm not in any way religious, I had to be very careful about my wording which made me highly anxious. But I did it.

My grandfather helped me out with SA. I think that was his parting gift to me.

Rest in peace grandpa, and thank you for being you. I'll miss you every day xx

[Luna Sea]

*hug*

You did good.

[JenN2791]

What a beautiful speech Glad all went well, dear! <3 *big hug*

[TakeOne]

Congratulations. Sounds amazing

[R91]

Originally Posted by TristanS

*hug*

You did good.

Originally Posted by JenN2791

What a beautiful speech Glad all went well, dear! <3 *big hug*

Originally Posted by TakeOne

Congratulations. Sounds amazing

Thank you so much. I really appreciate that

[chantellabella]

Sweetie, I'm soooooo proud of you. I know how hard that was. I'm so proud of the way you focused on your grandfather and overcame your anxiety to make him proud. And yes, I'm sure he heard you before he passed because hearing is the last sense. So you didn't imagine him smiling at you. He did. I wish I were there to give you a real hug. Go grab that kitty cat and let her give you a nice long snuggle. You deserve it.

Again, I'm just so proud of you.

[R91]

Originally Posted by chantellabella

Sweetie, I'm soooooo proud of you. I know how hard that was. I'm so proud of the way you focused on your grandfather and overcame your anxiety to make him proud. And yes, I'm sure he heard you before he passed because hearing is the last sense. So you didn't imagine him smiling at you. He did. I wish I were there to give you a real hug. Go grab that kitty cat and let her give you a nice long snuggle. You deserve it.

Again, I'm just so proud of you.

Haha you made me cry a little bit here! Thank you for your kind words xx

[MrQuiet76]

I'm so sorry for your loss

But way to go with the speech!! Look at you go! That took some real courage to do that. I love how you used something positive (your grandfather's memory) to overcome the anxiety and say what needed to be said. You have such a positive spirit and it really is inspiring

[Just Lurking]

This was good to hear - good for you

[R91]

Originally Posted by MrQuiet76

I'm so sorry for your loss

But way to go with the speech!! Look at you go! That took some real courage to do that. I love how you used something positive (your grandfather's memory) to overcome the anxiety and say what needed to be said. You have such a positive spirit and it really is inspiring

Thank you MrQuiet! It was incredibly scary but as you said, it needed to be done and I needed to honour his time with us in some way. He was a wonderful man and I'm really lucky I have so many good memories of him.

Originally Posted by Just Lurking

This was good to hear - good for you

Thank you I'm pretty proud of myself right now.

[velvetblade]

<Biiiig hug>

I think it was awesome, and it brought a tear to my eye also. Beautifully written and I think you are really brave for speaking in front of so many people about someone so dear to you

[R91]

Originally Posted by velvetblade

<Biiiig hug>

I think it was awesome, and it brought a tear to my eye also. Beautifully written and I think you are really brave for speaking in front of so many people about someone so dear to you

That's really sweet thank you x

[upndownboi]

Originally Posted by R91

My grandfather passed away three days ago and since then, things have been pretty crazy. Today was his final memorial service and my dad had asked me and my sisters to talk for a few minutes in front of everyone about his life etc. There were about 40 people.

This is what I wrote/read:



And ****ing hell, I was shaking as I read that, but then I just thought of my grandfather and I made eye contact with the people there and what I said seemed to really touch a few of them (gauging by tears). Many of them came up to me afterwards to tell me how much they liked it. And considering I'm not in any way religious, I had to be very careful about my wording which made me highly anxious. But I did it.

My grandfather helped me out with SA. I think that was his parting gift to me.

Rest in peace grandpa, and thank you for being you. I'll miss you every day xx

:') you stood up and with love in your heart you showed who you were. Perhaps, in a way, this opportunity was a gift he gave you.

Well done very well done

[R91]

Originally Posted by upndownboi

:') you stood up and with love in your heart you showed who you were. Perhaps, in a way, this opportunity was a gift he gave you.

Well done very well done

Yeah that's what I like to think! I don't know how he would react to SA as a disorder, but he was one of those people that would give you unconditional love and wisdom even if it didn't fit his views of the world or his views on how people work. He told my younger sister about Twitter before she even knew about it haha, even though he disagreed with the whole concept vehemently! He would never hold back his knowledge and was always incredibly open minded, so maybe he would have understood what a huge thing this was for me.

Thank you for your support, I really appreciate it

[upndownboi]

Originally Posted by R91

Yeah that's what I like to think! I don't know how he would react to SA as a disorder, but he was one of those people that would give you unconditional love and wisdom even if it didn't fit his views of the world or his views on how people work. He told my younger sister about Twitter before she even knew about it haha, even though he disagreed with the whole concept vehemently! He would never hold back his knowledge and was always incredibly open minded, so maybe he would have understood what a huge thing this was for me.

Thank you for your support, I really appreciate it

he sounds really loving and affirming, the world needs more of these people. grandparents are so important to have.

[WhoDey85]

I'm sorry for your loss. That is a very big thing you did especially for someone with SA. I'm sure your grandfather would be proud of you.

I have had thoughts about doing this for my uncle when he passes on despite my extreme SA. My uncle has done so much for me I actually think I wouldn't have a problem getting up there and speaking despite my extreme fear of it.

[R91]

Originally Posted by upndownboi

he sounds really loving and affirming, the world needs more of these people. grandparents are so important to have.

I agree!

Originally Posted by WhoDey85

I'm sorry for your loss. That is a very big thing you did especially for someone with SA. I'm sure your grandfather would be proud of you.

I have had thoughts about doing this for my uncle when he passes on despite my extreme SA. My uncle has done so much for me I actually think I wouldn't have a problem getting up there and speaking despite my extreme fear of it.

Thank you for your support. I think you should definitely do this for your uncle. It's scary before you do it but then once you actually start speaking and you think about your uncle, something happens and it melts away. I think your uncle would really appreciate that

[hopefulhere]

What a beautiful tribute to your grandfather! You should be very proud.

[R91]

Originally Posted by hopefulhere

What a beautiful tribute to your grandfather! You should be very proud.

Thank you so much. I am quite proud! And that doesn't happen often haha.

[Quinn the Eskimo]

Originally Posted by R91

I'm sure that he is in a better place at the moment, having a debate with his God on the importance of believing in a higher power.

lol (:

that was a great speech, im proud of you for having the courage to stand up and say it, I would be so nervous

your pappy would be so happy to hear what you said