Social Anxiety Support

goodthing · 11-01-2009, 10:49 PM

Ok, so I have been doing a lot better with my SA lately.

Some minor setbacks here and there, but those are to be expected. Overall, I'm proud of myself. However, I HATE it when people tell me something like, "Wow you're really coming out of your shell." It makes me want to crawl right back up into that "shell." Anyone else feel that way? I don't know why I hate it, I guess it makes me feel like they think I'm weird or something, it makes me really self-conscious when they say something like that. Am I alone here? Let me know.

CrashMedicate · 11-02-2009, 06:22 AM

When people tell you you're coming out of your shell, be happy. It means that all the hard work and effort you're putting into overcoming this is paying off. A big part of this deal is learning how to not care what other people think of you.

I think I'm on the same page as you right now. I'll make a joke, say something, or just act like a total goofball (aka being myself) and people's jaws will drop and I'll get looked at like I have seven heads. It makes me smile because I'm proving to myself that I can do this. Whether they like me or not, I couldn't care less. If someone doesn't like me they can just deal with it. Because I'm not going to deal with SA.

I think they act like this because they're shocked. The shock will wear off quickly and you'll soon be seen as someone who has personality and charisma, rather than the weird quiet person.

Sounds like you're doing great. Keep it up. Glad to hear from someone persevering.

lyssado707 · 11-02-2009, 07:59 AM

Yes! I feel the same way. U can say "oh and if u don't want me to get right back in that shell you won't draw attention to my social problems" lol. But yea, this is sort of like when people say "OMG u finally talked!" because they think that will reinforce you or something, but a lot of SAers don't wanna talk because they fear people's reactions when they do talk.

Alys · 11-02-2009, 08:33 AM

no your not alone. i feel just the same way about that.

Toad Licker · 11-02-2009, 11:12 AM

I'd tell ya but I can't get out of my shell.

goodthing · 11-02-2009, 03:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lyssado707

Yes! I feel the same way. U can say "oh and if u don't want me to get right back in that shell you won't draw attention to my social problems" lol. But yea, this is sort of like when people say "OMG u finally talked!" because they think that will reinforce you or something, but a lot of SAers don't wanna talk because they fear people's reactions when they do talk.

Yeah exactly! When I was a kid I knew a girl who had worse SA than me, and one day when she finally talked in class everyone went, "I can't believe you talked!" She never talked in class again after that. It's hard to not care about people's reactions, and that can make overcoming SA even harder!

11-01-2009, 10:49 PM	#1 (permalink)
goodthing Status: SAS Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 52	Getting there, but... Ok, so I have been doing a lot better with my SA lately. Some minor setbacks here and there, but those are to be expected. Overall, I'm proud of myself. However, I HATE it when people tell me something like, "Wow you're really coming out of your shell." It makes me want to crawl right back up into that "shell." Anyone else feel that way? I don't know why I hate it, I guess it makes me feel like they think I'm weird or something, it makes me really self-conscious when they say something like that. Am I alone here? Let me know.

11-02-2009, 06:22 AM	#2 (permalink)
CrashMedicate Status: Racing through life Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Riiiight here. Gender: Male Age: 24 Posts: 205	When people tell you you're coming out of your shell, be happy. It means that all the hard work and effort you're putting into overcoming this is paying off. A big part of this deal is learning how to not care what other people think of you. I think I'm on the same page as you right now. I'll make a joke, say something, or just act like a total goofball (aka being myself) and people's jaws will drop and I'll get looked at like I have seven heads. It makes me smile because I'm proving to myself that I can do this. Whether they like me or not, I couldn't care less. If someone doesn't like me they can just deal with it. Because I'm not going to deal with SA. I think they act like this because they're shocked. The shock will wear off quickly and you'll soon be seen as someone who has personality and charisma, rather than the weird quiet person. Sounds like you're doing great. Keep it up. Glad to hear from someone persevering. __________________ A man has to have goals. A man without goals is like a car without steering. You're going to crash.

11-02-2009, 07:59 AM	#3 (permalink)
lyssado707 Status: SAS Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Humboldt County, CA Age: 22 Posts: 3,228	Yes! I feel the same way. U can say "oh and if u don't want me to get right back in that shell you won't draw attention to my social problems" lol. But yea, this is sort of like when people say "OMG u finally talked!" because they think that will reinforce you or something, but a lot of SAers don't wanna talk because they fear people's reactions when they do talk. __________________ In Loving Memory, http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g1...6/P1000595.jpg http://i55.photobucket.com/albums/g1...P1000480-1.jpg Marmalade January 1991-February 19, 2007

11-02-2009, 11:12 AM	#5 (permalink)
Toad Licker Status: Broken Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: A Fruitloop Daydream Gender: Male Age: 44 Posts: 29,633	I'd tell ya but I can't get out of my shell. __________________ All will wither, go to sleep The ones you love you may not keep All you touch will fall apart The dreams you kill will break your heart There's no mercy, there's no rest The void will scream within your chest No one knows and no one will So leave this place that makes you Ill - Madder Mortem

11-02-2009, 08:33 AM	#4 (permalink)
Alys Status: mind bogglingly imperfect Join Date: Oct 2009 Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 85	no your not alone. i feel just the same way about that.