Social Anxiety Support

This is mee · 09-30-2009, 07:12 PM

Today in class (second day of this class) I sat next to a girl I didn't know...and she was cute. I wanted to talk to her so bad, but I am usually way too shy to. I woke up this morning telling myself that I would talk to at least one girl in class today though, so I had to!

After literally about 5-6 minutes of telling myself to just talk to her...counting down in my head "ok talk in 3...2...1" and "you're thinking about it too much, TALK!". I figured I would tell her "it's hot in here" but realized that there weren't many places to go after that: "its really hot in here" her: "yea...". See what I mean

After aboout another minute or so I forced myself to blurt out "Have you heard anything about this professor, is he hard?". She turned to me and replied "No, I haven't...have you?" Although I knew a lot about him having read a few things and asked some people I replied "Nah I haven't either, but judging from his syllabus he seems rough". I continued to tell her about me thinking of getting into the other section with another professor in which she replied "What about her, know anything?" She seemed into it and we went on for a good 45 seconds to a minute, then the teacher cut me off in the middle of my sentance. I finished it nonetheless feeling like an idiot when she turned to listen to him (no one in the class was talking at that point).

The professor went on to say that we had Extra Credit in the class so I commented, to her, "at least we get extra credit". She turned to me and said "Yea! And a lot of it too".
That's it...it may not seem like much to you but I was very proud that I spoke to her. It didn't go as far as I would have liked it to, but hopefully I see her again next time

.

Hope this will help anyone else in that situation; don't talk yourself out of it...don't even talk to yourself, GO FOR IT! Understand that if you talk to her and she ignores you/ends it quick, you lose nothing more than if you didnt talk to her. You will always gain something from these situations.
I understand all this, I just can't seem to execute it...every really.

wxolue · 09-30-2009, 07:19 PM

For me, it does not matter how many things I have to talk about, the conversation will only turn out based on how anxious I am at the moment. When im anxious, I usually think of what to say based on if it would be a normal response more than what I want to say. This kind of backfires on me since what I say just comes out weird and a lot of what I say isnt true/isnt what i believe. When im comfortable, I can talk about nothing at all and it will go fine.

Strombidae · 10-01-2009, 12:33 PM

Awesome dude, I wish I could convince myself like that. What exactly were you doing to convince yourself? Congrats on doing that anyway, I'd feel so anxious I wouldn't say anything.

09-30-2009, 07:12 PM	#1 (permalink)
This is mee Status: SAS Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Oregon Age: 20 Posts: 21	Attempt to escape my shell Today in class (second day of this class) I sat next to a girl I didn't know...and she was cute. I wanted to talk to her so bad, but I am usually way too shy to. I woke up this morning telling myself that I would talk to at least one girl in class today though, so I had to! After literally about 5-6 minutes of telling myself to just talk to her...counting down in my head "ok talk in 3...2...1" and "you're thinking about it too much, TALK!". I figured I would tell her "it's hot in here" but realized that there weren't many places to go after that: "its really hot in here" her: "yea...". See what I mean After aboout another minute or so I forced myself to blurt out "Have you heard anything about this professor, is he hard?". She turned to me and replied "No, I haven't...have you?" Although I knew a lot about him having read a few things and asked some people I replied "Nah I haven't either, but judging from his syllabus he seems rough". I continued to tell her about me thinking of getting into the other section with another professor in which she replied "What about her, know anything?" She seemed into it and we went on for a good 45 seconds to a minute, then the teacher cut me off in the middle of my sentance. I finished it nonetheless feeling like an idiot when she turned to listen to him (no one in the class was talking at that point). The professor went on to say that we had Extra Credit in the class so I commented, to her, "at least we get extra credit". She turned to me and said "Yea! And a lot of it too". That's it...it may not seem like much to you but I was very proud that I spoke to her. It didn't go as far as I would have liked it to, but hopefully I see her again next time . Hope this will help anyone else in that situation; don't talk yourself out of it...don't even talk to yourself, GO FOR IT! Understand that if you talk to her and she ignores you/ends it quick, you lose nothing more than if you didnt talk to her. You will always gain something from these situations. I understand all this, I just can't seem to execute it...every really.

10-01-2009, 12:33 PM	#3 (permalink)
Strombidae Status: Overthinker. Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Long Island, New York Gender: Male Posts: 32	Awesome dude, I wish I could convince myself like that. What exactly were you doing to convince yourself? Congrats on doing that anyway, I'd feel so anxious I wouldn't say anything. __________________ Conquering it one step at a time.

09-30-2009, 07:19 PM	#2 (permalink)
wxolue Status: SAS Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 334	For me, it does not matter how many things I have to talk about, the conversation will only turn out based on how anxious I am at the moment. When im anxious, I usually think of what to say based on if it would be a normal response more than what I want to say. This kind of backfires on me since what I say just comes out weird and a lot of what I say isnt true/isnt what i believe. When im comfortable, I can talk about nothing at all and it will go fine.