Social Anxiety Support

bridgmack · 08-29-2012, 09:07 PM

I've been going to the same therapist for over a year. And i still can't look at her when i talk to her. I'm always looking at the ground or my hands. I'm starting to wonder if she thinks its rude or thinks i'm not listening! Although i am listening its hard for me to look at her..
Do any of you feel this way?
Also i mostly let her do the talking.. Sometimes i chipe in and say something but normally i just answer her questions or talk about what she wants to talk about.
Is that normal?

Green Eyes · 08-30-2012, 12:50 PM

I think it's sort of normal if you have sa, but it can be bad for you.
With all my past therapist (about4-5) had had this too. And I didn't get any better. I don't know why you are in therapy ands so, I was afraid to tell them things and let her lead the sessions. But now I have a therapist and she is really good. I feel comfortable around her and talk easy with her. Maybe you should say what you feel to her? Or maybe you need a better therapist?

JGreenwood · 08-30-2012, 12:55 PM

I was this way too. but my therapist noticed pretty quickly and made me look into her eyes directly for an entire session. After that it was not a problem for me.

Pam · 08-31-2012, 08:16 AM

Back when I was severely depressed and had zero self-esteem, I couldn't look at my old therapist at all. When I did, I was surprised he had brown eyes--I thought for sure they were blue.

Ten yrs and a few therapists later, I still have a problem with sustained eye contact.

One therapsit I had was starting to show her pregnancy and one day I said something about her being pregnant. She was shocked that I even noticed because she said that most people don't notice it--that they just look at her face, the floor, or the door, lol. So don't feel too bad--it's pretty common I guess.

But, since it bothers you so much, maybe you should add it to your list of things you could trying changing.

deadender · 09-05-2012, 06:18 AM

Have thee same problem, always stare at the floor or wall.

Also cover my mouth with my hand when I'm talking.

Don't know why, because I like her and she's also very good looking, that's maybe the problem actually...

08-29-2012, 09:07 PM	#1 (permalink)
bridgmack Status: SAS Member Join Date: Aug 2012 Posts: 1	Looking at your therapist. I've been going to the same therapist for over a year. And i still can't look at her when i talk to her. I'm always looking at the ground or my hands. I'm starting to wonder if she thinks its rude or thinks i'm not listening! Although i am listening its hard for me to look at her.. Do any of you feel this way? Also i mostly let her do the talking.. Sometimes i chipe in and say something but normally i just answer her questions or talk about what she wants to talk about. Is that normal?

08-31-2012, 08:16 AM	#4 (permalink)
Pam Status: Fitting In Here & There Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Western New York Gender: Female Age: 44 Posts: 754	Back when I was severely depressed and had zero self-esteem, I couldn't look at my old therapist at all. When I did, I was surprised he had brown eyes--I thought for sure they were blue. Ten yrs and a few therapists later, I still have a problem with sustained eye contact. One therapsit I had was starting to show her pregnancy and one day I said something about her being pregnant. She was shocked that I even noticed because she said that most people don't notice it--that they just look at her face, the floor, or the door, lol. So don't feel too bad--it's pretty common I guess. But, since it bothers you so much, maybe you should add it to your list of things you could trying changing. __________________ I don't need anyone to approve of what I say or do...but it's always nice when someone does. http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000279759091 My Blog: http://cloud-neptune.blogspot.com/

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08-30-2012, 12:50 PM	#2 (permalink)
Green Eyes Status: SAS Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: The Netherlands Gender: Female Age: 23 Posts: 896	I think it's sort of normal if you have sa, but it can be bad for you. With all my past therapist (about4-5) had had this too. And I didn't get any better. I don't know why you are in therapy ands so, I was afraid to tell them things and let her lead the sessions. But now I have a therapist and she is really good. I feel comfortable around her and talk easy with her. Maybe you should say what you feel to her? Or maybe you need a better therapist?

08-30-2012, 12:55 PM	#3 (permalink)
JGreenwood Status: Skeletal wreck of man... Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: Anywhere, USA Gender: Male Posts: 1,491	I was this way too. but my therapist noticed pretty quickly and made me look into her eyes directly for an entire session. After that it was not a problem for me.

09-05-2012, 06:18 AM	#5 (permalink)
deadender Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jul 2012 Posts: 47	Have thee same problem, always stare at the floor or wall. Also cover my mouth with my hand when I'm talking. Don't know why, because I like her and she's also very good looking, that's maybe the problem actually...