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Old 07-23-2009, 05:03 PM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Default Catholic trouble going to communion

Hi. Is anyone out there Catholic and won't go up to communion because you are too nervous?

I haven't gone in about 5 years, even though I still attend mass. I have many experiences where I was really shaky while in line and receiving communion, and thinking people were noticing eventually got to me.

I really want to start going again, but the anxiety about this is just as bad, if not worse, than it was before.

Does anyone else deal with this? Not that I would wish this on anybody, but it you are out there I would love to hear your experience and what you did or didn't do to fix it.
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Old 07-23-2009, 05:58 PM   #2 (permalink)
 
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Haha all the time... but for me its more because I'm a sinner. But yeah, the reason I stopped going up and even to church most of the time was because of anxiety.
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Old 07-23-2009, 06:16 PM   #3 (permalink)
 
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nah not really . My anxiety has never been linked with going for communion.. all I can say to you is, try to think of it as a simple chore
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Old 07-24-2009, 06:03 AM   #4 (permalink)
 
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Yes, and when I was nervous (I do not attend church anymore) my anxiety wasn't nearly as bad as it is now! I couldn't imagine going now!
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Old 07-24-2009, 02:57 PM   #5 (permalink)
 
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I know how you feel about being nervous in church. The church that my mom and dad go to, I went a couple times with them. I felt very uncomfortable being around all the people I didn't know, plus there was no one there my age. The part where the preacher asks everyone to greet each other is the part that really causes anxiety with me. I would like to start attending services regularly though, just scared to.
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Old 07-27-2009, 07:43 PM   #6 (permalink)
 
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Thanks, everyone. I want to be able to think of it as a chore and do it, but I am not there yet. It just makes me so nervous that I am almost not present in the situation, I really feel sick with anxiety at those times, lightheaded and just feeling my nervousness, not really being rational and thinking straight. Even when I try to prepare myself and think I am calm, when it gets close to having to walk up there all I need is one thought that I am going to get shaky and not even a minute later I am feeling very heavy weight of anxiety on me and then I really am shaky.
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Old 08-07-2009, 09:58 AM   #7 (permalink)
 
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What I do when I am having a rough time at church is sit in the back row, sometimes even stand in the back where no one can see me. Then when its time for communnion, I go up and look at the floor the whole time or analyze the shirt of the person in front of me. It distracts me, and I end up thinking about that stray thread and how it might have gotten there. Then when its time to face the priest or EM, I look at my hands and get out of there as quickly as possible.

You could also talk to the priest or give him a note (if you are up for it) and ask to receive at the end of mass because of anxiety. Like just go into the sacristy after mass is dismissed and get it and leave, avoiding all the people. But that is a whole new level of anxiety, I realize. But it may work.

Anyway, good luck. I know where you're coming from, and it stinks
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Old 08-07-2009, 04:01 PM   #8 (permalink)
 
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For a while I had to stop taking the wine because my hands would shake real badly when I took the chalice. It got to where I was so concerned that it was going to happen, that I think my worrying about it made it much worse. Luckily I was able to take the host so I just passed on the wine for a long time, then tried it again a year or so later, and so far have been okay with it. Our church started some tradition where you're supposed to bow right before you receive communion and I'm not able to do it. I just can't for some reason; I'm so self-conscious. Part of me worries that the priest will view me as disrespectful since he's requested a few times that everyone bow, but realistically I don't think anyone spends much time, if any, worrying about what I do or don't do. God knows why I don't bow -- that's good enough for me. It's important to me to receive communion so I'm grateful that I'm able to. I sympathize with your situation. Why don't you ask the big guy for help with that? That's what I'd do.
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Old 08-08-2009, 03:09 PM   #9 (permalink)
 
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The posts are very helpful.

I forgot that I used to look at the shirt of the person in front of me when going up to communion, and the floor too! That does help. I don't feel up to talking to a priest right now, but that is something I've considered. It reminds me one time at confession I mentioned my situation and that I hadn't been going to communion, and the priest was very kind and let me know that he also has an anxiety disorder and was being treated for it. He was very encouraging.

One church I used to go to, most everyone would bow before receiving communion. There were a lot of people who would genuflect, and I remember thinking how I was too nervous to do that. I liked the church a lot, and that they were reverent in receiving communion was beautiful. I think the difficult thing about it is that I wanted to participate more and not have the anxiety there everytime I was at mass. I like what you wrote kpiper0101:

"Part of me worries that the priest will view me as disrespectful since he's requested a few times that everyone bow, but realistically I don't think anyone spends much time, if any, worrying about what I do or don't do. God knows why I don't bow -- that's good enough for me. It's important to me to receive communion so I'm grateful that I'm able to."

I am thankful that God looks at what is in our hearts.
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Old 08-08-2009, 03:42 PM   #10 (permalink)
 
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Please try to talk to your Priest, he will understand and I am sure he will make whatever other arrangements that you need to have to be able to receive the Eucharist. Even if you have to write him a letter if you can't call him or approach him about it.
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Old 08-10-2009, 04:47 PM   #11 (permalink)
 
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I will definitely be keeping that open as a possibility. I think you are right that he would work with me. Thanks.
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Old 08-11-2009, 09:57 AM   #12 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by brokenlight View Post
Hi. Is anyone out there Catholic and won't go up to communion because you are too nervous?

I haven't gone in about 5 years, even though I still attend mass. I have many experiences where I was really shaky while in line and receiving communion, and thinking people were noticing eventually got to me.

I really want to start going again, but the anxiety about this is just as bad, if not worse, than it was before.

Does anyone else deal with this? Not that I would wish this on anybody, but it you are out there I would love to hear your experience and what you did or didn't do to fix it.
You are supposed to think of Communion as cleansing the soul from sin and taking part in something that Jesus himself did with his disciples.

As for the anxiety, "cast all your cares on Him, for He cares for you".
He will only give us what we can handle, beyond that, we take on too much.
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Old 08-11-2009, 06:54 PM   #13 (permalink)
 
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I try to stay focused on why I am going up to communion, but unfortunately I have trouble thinking straight when I am in the moment. I can't even explain to myself how I continue to let my anxiety stop me from receiving Jesus in the Eucharist.

I'll try to remember this: "cast all your cares on Him, for He cares for you".
He will only give us what we can handle, beyond that, we take on too much.
Thanks.
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Old 08-19-2009, 10:33 AM   #14 (permalink)
 
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I also have this problem. However, I try to pray and ignore all the other people. I also went to a church where people would genuflect and I did not because of self-consciousness. I felt really disrespectful but couldn't do it. However, I always tell myself that I can't stop receiving the Eucharist or going to Mass because that is the most important thing for me. Confession is also really hard and stressful. I have been thinking lately to tell the priest my situation at confession but I don't think I have the courage to do it. I also feel very sinful because I don't help other people and am not active in anything because of my anxiety. I know I should trust in God and everything will be okay but my fear controls my life. Sorry for the long post.
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Old 08-20-2009, 07:23 PM   #15 (permalink)
 
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I like what you said about continuing to go to Eucharist and Mass because that is the most important thing for you. That is a great outlook to have. This is one area of my life that I really wish the anxiety had not infected. Somehow I keep letting the anxiety overpower me. ?? I don't understand this. I know the story is not over though.

Confession is stressful for me too. I don't like standing in a slow moving confession line! Normally once I've made it to the confessional the experience is a good one though. I try to pray before I go concerning the priest. I would like to do more to help people too. Sometimes it takes an effort for me even to be friendly and talk to someone, and then there are people who are actively involved in serving less fortunate or sick people. I think I should be more of a participant also. I just try to avoid social situations, and so the idea of volunteering is kind of intimidating to me. I have been trying at least to make small efforts for God in the way I treat people and in needs that present themselves to me. Thanks for your post!
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