Why do I make everything so difficult? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-01-2011, 08:45 PM Thread Starter
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Why do I make everything so difficult?


Don't it make you sad to know that life
is more than who we are?
--Name--Goo Goo Dolls--
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post #2 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-01-2011, 08:52 PM
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That's serious business man. I sympathize. I face this myself at times when I'm writing papers. I want you to know though: you might be scared, you might be in a transitional period and not have all the skills you'd want to have, you might not quite see the sequence of events that leads to this being finished, but I believe that you are the kind of person who can get it done anyway.
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post #3 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-01-2011, 09:00 PM
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That's tough. I put the same type of pressure on myself with every assignment - it's hard not too.

That's cool that your prof has agreed to help you. Are there any writing centres on your campus? They might be able to give you tips with paper-stress too.

I don't know if this is the same for you but personally, I find starting is the hardest part so I just write something, ANYTHING, down, and once I get into the writing groove then I go back and made it better. Just something to kick start your focus.

Good luck!

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post #4 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-01-2011, 10:37 PM
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I've been a silent reader of this forum for a month now, but today I finally decided to join. I read your post and I just had to comment because I can totally relate to your essay writing anxiety!

I'm a university student and my anxiety is impacting my course work immensely. It's hard for me to start writing my essays as I'm afraid of not doing as well as I think I can.
This fear keeps me from completing my work on time and I just hate how it's hindering my success in university.

Right now, I'm really stressed out since I have a lot of overdue assignments to hand in.

I could go on and on about my anxiety issues, but for now I'll just leave it at this.
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post #5 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-01-2011, 10:57 PM
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I can totally relate to the essay-writing anxiety. My problem is that I'm just not articulate and I have trouble expressing my thoughts eloquently. I always fear that what I write will just be a big crappy mess
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post #6 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-02-2011, 07:27 AM
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Originally Posted by NoSocialButterfly View Post
It's easier for me to just sit on the couch obsessing about it rather than working on it. Why?
Heh, I've been writing for a living for over 16 years and I still do this!! Sometimes a couple weeks go by when I shoud be starting on a project, but the thought of getting into it makes me want to run away.

I blame it on laziness and fear of not being master of my domain. For me, it takes a certain amount of effort, fumbling, and feeling stupid to get to a critical mass of information about the topic. But then the writing of takes a life of its own and starts producing itself.

To get over it, I usually pick an easy entry point, some part of the subject where it's easy to get started, and push on from there.

"To study the Way is to study the self. To study the self is to forget the self. To forget the self is to be enlightened by all things. To be enlightened by all things is to remove the barriers between one's self and others."

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post #7 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-03-2011, 07:52 AM
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Yeah I've had similar issues. Usually putting it off to last possible minute and scrambling in the end to finish. At the same time I'm worrying about how I'm going to fail for not doing it. Writing is also a very anxious subject for me as well and on occasion it can take me forever to finish one.

That said I have learned a few things that have helped me:

Always Make an Outline - Not only is it good for the structure of your paper but it allows you to break up the assignment into parts so that you can divide your time accordingly. Also, it has the added benefit of making it look less like an overwhelming task, baby steps.

Consider Paper for First Draft - A lot of us spent are entire K-12 education using regular pencil and paper. It's a medium with which we are comfortable. For me I tend to flow better on paper for some reason. It's almost like what has been written is set in stone. However, with a word processor I tend to agonize over the wording of a single sentence deleting then retyping OCD style.

If I think of anything else I'll let you know.
Best of Luck
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post #8 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-03-2011, 04:07 PM
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Originally Posted by NoSocialButterfly View Post
Sorry that you are having to deal with this as well. I wish there was some easy solution to this because I don't know what to do. My professor mentioned extended the deadline for me, but I haven't heard from her since Friday. Anyway, the paper is due tomorrow and guess what...I haven't started it. Oh, and because I'm stressing over this class, I'm behind on my art appreciation class, which I have a major assignment due tomorrow for it.

Thank you for your concern! I hope you were able to get help from your professor regarding your essay and that you were able to hand it in.

Anxiety has been affecting every aspect of my life. I feel like I'm mentally paralyzed. Right now, I'm stressed about handing in all my late assignments and passing all my courses. It's very hard for me to start my assignments on time as my anxiety paralyzes me completely. It's quite frustrating!

Same here, when I'm stressing over one assignment, I end up falling behind on my other assignments. I also e-mailed one of my professors regarding my overdue assignments but he hasn't e-mailed me back yet. This has increased my anxiety even more.

I don't have much time left to complete my work as it's due tomorrow. I hope I can force myself to hand in something as something is better than nothing at this point.
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post #9 of 9 (permalink) Old 04-03-2011, 04:55 PM
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You owe yourself credit for keeping on trying. Yeah you dropped out but you've kept going back. And you have no reason to feel ashamed for asking for help, you got a positive outcome from asking for help, she's offering you some. You're putting alot of pressure on yourself and it must be so difficult to focus on the paper while you're thinking about how it'll affect the future. I know it's hard but try to focus on the exact moment you're in.

When you start to write maybe just start by making bullet points about what you'll include. As soon as you get something down you'll be making progress. That might sound obvious but it helps me when I feel daunted by something I have to write. I just jot down really brief notes then write it up really roughly and it feels less intimidating.
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