Why are people so rude and judgmental?
As a person with social anxiety disorder, I've always felt like myself and many others dealing with SA have an acute awareness of how they appear to others and choose their words carefully to avoid offending or hurting others feelings. We're probably more empathetic than the average person. I know in my case that has always been true. Even when I don't like someone, I have never gone out of my way to make them feel like ****. I simply avoid them altogether. For the better part of my life I've isolated myself in fear of people and my perceived thoughts about how they would receive me as a 28 year old man who doesn't drive or work due to crippling social anxiety.
Recently though, my mom broke her leg and I have been obligated to start getting out there and doing all the daily things she can't do right now since she's immobile. In a short time I've gotten a crash course on grocery shopping by myself, cashing checks at the bank, picking up my mom's meds at the pharmacy, making phonecalls to set up doctor's appointments, etc etc.
As I get out there on foot, walking around town and interacting with people more than I ever have in my life prior, I'm realizing that I really wasn't all that wrong in my perception of people and their reactions, unfortunately..
In the last two days I've had a couple shi**y experiences with people..
Yesterday I was grocery shopping. I had my cart with my stuff, there was a long line in Dollar General that was backed up in front of some item displays.. this older woman comes up and stands behind me, without any items to pay for that I could see. She took her sunglasses off and was groaning to herself, huffing like she was so put out by the long line. With my anxiety I was thinking "Well damn, maybe she needs to get something and I'm in her way.." so, trying to be considerate I turned to her and simply asked "Sorry, am I in your way?" She reacted as though my simply asking the question was an insult and said "What? No..I'm just standing in line..if you were in my way I'd tell you to get out of my way!.." like I was some kind of idiot for even asking. I instantly felt stupid and just said "Oh okay, just checking."
The second thing was just today, I was grocery shopping again. Since I don't drive I walk to the store with a backpack on and keep some of the store's ten cent bags in it for when I get to check out. So.. I go up the store, get a cart.. as I'm taking some plastic bags out of my backpack another older woman walks out of the store with her daughter, and they pass me on the way to her car. This lady took one look at me, turned to her daughter and said plenty loud enough for me to hear her.. "See, that's what you can do if you don't go to school!" As if I was some homeless piece of trash or something?
This is exactly the kind of sh*t that always made me want to avoid people.. how can the average person be so thoughtless, rude, and judgmental? I mean damn, someone who walks to the store with a backpack must automatically be a homeless dropout or something?!
I would never judge a person or be an outright *** to them without knowing their situation. Even if I got a knee-jerk reaction to the way someone looks I'd just keep it to myself, but it seems like people go out of their way to express their opinions about others and they don't think about how it hurts. This world is f**cked up, that's all I can say..