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Old 08-04-2012, 01:56 PM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Default Where should a 'normal' 22 year old be by now in life?

I feel terrible I have not achieved much in life at all I have had so many problems growing up. I'm just barely starting a junior college and will be in college for at least 5 years so finish when I'm 27 or maybe even 28.

In your opinion where should a person of my age be according to societies standards?

- Living not with parents anymore
- Having a girlfriend, getting married soon maybe children?
- Career established finishing up college by now?
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Old 08-04-2012, 02:05 PM   #2 (permalink)
 
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Well, I've been out of touch with societies standards forever, so I might be wrong.

Living with the parents, going to school, and dating but not committed to anyone. 22 is too young to be tied to anyone when you have more important things to achieve. Do what you have to do, even if it means graduating at age 28. That is, my .02

Sounds like you're doing just fine for yourself.
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Old 08-04-2012, 02:41 PM   #3 (permalink)
 
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Your situation appears pretty average going by all the people I've known. It depends where you live though. Many I know here didn't leave home till late 20s or early 30s. They were studying. Almost no one (most of us now in our 30s) got married. I know only two couples who did that and they're the only ones who had kids. I attribute it to hanging around with more educated people. Quite a few of them intend to never have kids. Many of them didn't finish their education till their mid-late 20s or about 30 due to doing PhDs.
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Old 08-04-2012, 03:22 PM   #4 (permalink)
 
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There is not standard, or "normal". I (along with a lot of people) am not going to be finished university until I'm nearly thirty, and even then I'll always be changing and evolving, and learning. Relish that journey and try not to get caught up in silly comparisons and egoic bull**** that often comes with the transition into early adulthood. Work on being consistent and happy in your day to day, nothing else matters.
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Old 08-04-2012, 03:28 PM   #5 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JimmyDeansRetartedCousin View Post
There is not standard, or "normal". I (along with a lot of people) am not going to be finished university until I'm nearly thirty, and even then I'll always be changing and evolving, and learning. Relish that journey and try not to get caught up in silly comparisons and egoic bull**** that often comes with the transition into early adulthood. Work on being consistent and happy in your day to day, nothing else matters.
This a million times.
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Old 08-04-2012, 03:46 PM   #6 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JimmyDeansRetartedCousin View Post
There is not standard, or "normal". I (along with a lot of people) am not going to be finished university until I'm nearly thirty, and even then I'll always be changing and evolving, and learning. Relish that journey and try not to get caught up in silly comparisons and egoic bull**** that often comes with the transition into early adulthood. Work on being consistent and happy in your day to day, nothing else matters.
I pretty much agree with this sentiment. Myself and nearly all my classmates growing up finished university "as expected" but many, including myself have graduated with lots of school debt and have either faced the harsh reality that economy has changed or coming out realizing it's not something we want to pursue. Some are working in their respective fields, some are going back to school for further education or in completely different fields, while others are just working jobs and volunteering until positions are available. While in my program, I met several late 20's even 40 year olds who had careers previously, but decided to pursue something else. And I have had mentors in their 30s who told me how they considered changing careers, so really why the rush? Take the time to figure out what you really want to do, explore different things I would say that nearly all my friends are still living with their parents unless they're married. As for relationships, that varies too. Some are married, some are in relationships, some are still messing around. It's not a rush. Just coming out of a serious relationship, I think I fall into the category of people who still need to discover who they are, what they want and so forth, which apparently the 20's are known for. There's actually a term for it haha called quarter life crisis. And considering that there is like a 50% divorce rate...I'm not too much in a hurry to settle down. I think too many people feel pressured to do things to conform to societal norms, including rushing to settle down when they really don't know what they want. I think that's one reason younger couples don't last. However, it is always admirable to see the ones that do! So yeah, just enjoy the journey!
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Old 08-04-2012, 03:49 PM   #7 (permalink)
 
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I thought I would finish college at 21 and have a job before I even graduated. Not gonna happen. Things never go according to plan.
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Old 08-04-2012, 04:00 PM   #8 (permalink)
 
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Ever since I was forced to drop out of my university course at the age of 20, my life has gone downhill. I was unemployed for just over a year, then I finally got my first full-time job, but I only had it for 4 months. So I'm unemployed again, still living with my parents, no driving licence, and no girlfriend. Almost all of my old friends have what I don't have: a job, their own home, a car, and a partner (some are engaged and have children).

I completely understand the feeling, linxy5. I feel like I haven't achieved much in life either, and I'll be turning 22 in a few days
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Old 08-04-2012, 04:02 PM   #9 (permalink)
 
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Originally Posted by joseph1170 View Post
The econmoy is fairly bad right now so it is harder to achieve some goals. That you are going to college is extremely good but you do need to be able to work in different fields to insure that you get a job whenever you get out of college so have alot of back-ups. You do still need to be aggressive and open to finding a mate throughout this time. You are young so you have time.

Agrees with bold letters 100 percent!!
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Old 08-04-2012, 04:08 PM   #10 (permalink)
 
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There is this 22 year old who I consider normal, has already graduated and gotten accepted into a master's program, works at some library, is in a relationship, and lives on her own. She seems slightly above average to me, if that's anything to go by.
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Old 08-04-2012, 04:15 PM   #11 (permalink)
 
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I'm 22, I have no friends, no girlfriend, work a crappy dead end job, and I'm not even going to college. My only goal right now is to work up the courage to commit suicide.
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Old 08-04-2012, 04:16 PM   #12 (permalink)
 
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Originally Posted by ThatOneQuietGuy View Post
I'm 22, I have no friends, no girlfriend, work a crappy dead end job, and I'm not even going to college. My only goal right now is to work up the courage to commit suicide.
........... >.<
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Old 08-04-2012, 04:18 PM   #13 (permalink)
 
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i use to think like this. then i decided society is a joke and i dont feel so pressured. all i gotta say is try and stop living by the standards everyone is supposed to care about and just try. never give up and figure your life out. dont compare it to anyone elses, you arent them.
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Old 08-04-2012, 04:20 PM   #14 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trisquel View Post
........... >.<
What's that supposed to mean? I'm being completely serious.
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Old 08-04-2012, 04:24 PM   #15 (permalink)
 
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Originally Posted by ThatOneQuietGuy View Post
I'm 22, I have no friends, no girlfriend, work a crappy dead end job, and I'm not even going to college. My only goal right now is to work up the courage to commit suicide.
I might do the same. This world ****ing sucks with handling money and jobs.
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Old 08-04-2012, 04:29 PM   #16 (permalink)
 
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I'm 28 and I have no skills, and no education, but I'm turning my life around. I'm going into the military, learning some skills, getting an education and just bettering myself.

There is no set time or age to do or have anything. Doesn't it seem kind of superficial that you are judging yourself by the physical objects and achievements of others? Are these people as nice as you? Would they step on other people to get what they wanted? What kind of dark secrets do they have?

Worry more about yourself and what you CAN do as opposed to what you don't have. Life will be better this way.
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Old 08-04-2012, 05:17 PM   #17 (permalink)
 
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What's that supposed to mean? I'm being completely serious.
Nothing. You just summarized my life as well... =/
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Old 08-04-2012, 05:55 PM   #18 (permalink)
 
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Most kids are just starting their lives around that age. I didn't go to university until 22. Did community college first and had to start from scratch because i wasn't a good high school student. I know it's societies pressure to get rich and successful while you are "young", the world seems calibrated to youth. Anyway don't beat yourself up because a lot of people in this economy are going back to school in their "30's" now, so don't worry there is a such thing as a "late-bloomer".
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Old 08-04-2012, 06:04 PM   #19 (permalink)
 
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I turned 22 two months ago. I feel like I havent accomplished anything either. No job, no gf, no money. It's gotten me really depressed
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Old 08-04-2012, 07:26 PM   #20 (permalink)
 
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It will be better if you focus on what would you want to achieve now.
in the next six months or in this year.
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