Social Anxiety Support

SloopjohnB · 06-22-2009, 08:11 AM

I seem to have a hard time accepting what is a man and what does he do for people. I work, go to school and get good grades, treat the friends that I do have with respect and non-judgmental rapport.

This is what bugs me so much about getting over, I want to be happy and content but my confusion lies in how I should express it. I love so much in my life but I am afraid to show it.

Does anybody deal with this problem? The "wanting to be and do more" attitude but is mentally blocked because I would not when I was younger?

DAV3 · 06-22-2009, 10:46 AM

What is a man but a miserable pile of lies? (sry had to make the Castlevania reference

)

On a serious note, if you want to find out who you truly are it is best to simply not think about it at all (I hope that makes sense :S). The mentality of most SAers generally revolves around negative and irrational thoughts (like not feeling your good enough) that can occur at any time and continually build up. Once the negative thinking starts it only gets worse, and it can really warp your perception.

What has helped me with these thoughts is to isolate them as soon as they pop in my head. I generally think of happy thoughts or attempt to totally clear my head every time these negative thoughts happen (keeping yourself busy can also eliminate these thoughts). Most of the time it works for me.

I still have my bad days, but this technique has helped me out a ton. You could always give it a shot. If it doesn't work for you, there are many other techniques you can try. Your true identity will come out when you aren't even thinking about it. Just remember not to stress the little things and try to take a "blind leap" every once in a while. Good luck John, I'm right there with ya.

xyzhousexyz · 06-22-2009, 11:33 AM

I'm not sure i get your issue, is it that you want to do more, love and express yourself more with fam and friends, but feel your not supposed to? because your a man, and men are supposed to be hard and tufff?

06-22-2009, 08:11 AM	#1 (permalink)
SloopjohnB Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Madison, WI Gender: Male Posts: 276	What is identity and why do I question it? I seem to have a hard time accepting what is a man and what does he do for people. I work, go to school and get good grades, treat the friends that I do have with respect and non-judgmental rapport. This is what bugs me so much about getting over, I want to be happy and content but my confusion lies in how I should express it. I love so much in my life but I am afraid to show it. Does anybody deal with this problem? The "wanting to be and do more" attitude but is mentally blocked because I would not when I was younger?

06-22-2009, 10:46 AM	#2 (permalink)
DAV3 Status: Going with the Flow Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Virginia Gender: Male Age: 20 Posts: 52	What is a man but a miserable pile of lies? (sry had to make the Castlevania reference ) On a serious note, if you want to find out who you truly are it is best to simply not think about it at all (I hope that makes sense :S). The mentality of most SAers generally revolves around negative and irrational thoughts (like not feeling your good enough) that can occur at any time and continually build up. Once the negative thinking starts it only gets worse, and it can really warp your perception. What has helped me with these thoughts is to isolate them as soon as they pop in my head. I generally think of happy thoughts or attempt to totally clear my head every time these negative thoughts happen (keeping yourself busy can also eliminate these thoughts). Most of the time it works for me. I still have my bad days, but this technique has helped me out a ton. You could always give it a shot. If it doesn't work for you, there are many other techniques you can try. Your true identity will come out when you aren't even thinking about it. Just remember not to stress the little things and try to take a "blind leap" every once in a while. Good luck John, I'm right there with ya.

06-22-2009, 11:33 AM	#3 (permalink)
xyzhousexyz Status: Mission:Positivity>****** Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Bronx, New York Gender: Male Posts: 294	I'm not sure i get your issue, is it that you want to do more, love and express yourself more with fam and friends, but feel your not supposed to? because your a man, and men are supposed to be hard and tufff?