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Old 12-21-2010, 07:20 PM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Default What do you do when most people at work don't like you?

Most people at work don't like me for whatever reason and I am the subject of constant gossip. How do you guys deal with situations like these? Quitting isn't an option. They haven't tried to get rid of me yet although I think that could be coming in the next 6 months. I've been at my current job 2 years.
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Old 12-21-2010, 07:23 PM   #2 (permalink)
 
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Do you know what they are saying about you? Is it about your work performance, or something else?
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Old 12-21-2010, 07:37 PM   #3 (permalink)
 
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Not about my work performance. They think that when I've called in sick in the past I've been lying. I spoke to my supervisor about this and she said they have no reason to suspect that I was and I was not calling in excessively. I also overheard her say that she didn't like me after I e-mailed her about the above though.
I tend to get very anxious in confrontational situations and when I met with her I was nervous as all hell so maybe I seemed like a whiner. No clue.
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Old 12-21-2010, 07:38 PM   #4 (permalink)
 
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no one hates me at work..but if they did..i wouldnt give a flying fu**.
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Old 12-21-2010, 07:49 PM   #5 (permalink)
 
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Gossipers, eh? Well if you're going down, you could always go down fighting.

By this I mean stirring up as much **** as you can on your way out. Make their work lives a living hell. That'll give 'em something to gossip about!
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Old 12-21-2010, 07:52 PM   #6 (permalink)
 
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I wouldn't care cuz they're not the people paying me to work there.
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Old 12-21-2010, 07:53 PM   #7 (permalink)
 
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Erm, not helping. Was looking for more practical advice. I don't know if I'm going "out" or not.
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Old 12-21-2010, 08:22 PM   #8 (permalink)
 
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It was smart of you to ask about your sick calls, most employees wouldn't give a rip how they looked, even with the gossip, so long as they got away with it.

She doesn't sound very professional, saying she doesn't like you. Your HR people would not like that!

It's hard to give helpful advice without knowing more about your supervisor. But if you're in bad with her and with other employees, yes, you could be on the way out regardless of your performance. I've seen it happen, to a guy who was an icon in our industry and had worked for the company for 25 years, but he made things difficult so that people didn't like to work with him.

It's time for you to shine, keep your head down and focus on your work, give a little more than expected, bring cookies on Monday, etc. I'm not saying to brown-nose, but just show a sincere interest in helping the company and making everyone else's job a little easier.
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Old 12-21-2010, 08:23 PM   #9 (permalink)
 
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It isn't you. It's them. They're being too personal and unprofessional. Maybe this is something you should talk to the manager about?
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Old 12-21-2010, 08:39 PM   #10 (permalink)
 
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Most people at work don't like me for whatever reason and I am the subject of constant gossip. How do you guys deal with situations like these?
Don't like them back, and do your job well. If you are not a drain on the workplace's resources/money (i.e. you produce more output to keep the employer's margin at an acceptable level), you probably won't be fired.

As for the liking part, don't let that bother you. And if they actively attempt to display their dislike of you, you can exhibit your own dislike for them as well.
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Old 12-21-2010, 09:07 PM   #11 (permalink)
 
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Most of the people where I work don't like me either, the ones that like me tell me the others don't. I just go in and do my job and a little more so the bosses can't complain. I don't care about what the others say because I am not accountable to them and don't socialize with them. It is always good to keep resume updated and look if your are not happy there.
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Old 12-22-2010, 02:45 AM   #12 (permalink)
 
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Uh-oh. Do you have any clue as to why they don't like you? Are there any colleagues there who you like and get along nicely with?
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Old 12-22-2010, 02:52 AM   #13 (permalink)
 
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I Cry On The Inside....your around people at work more then you friends and family sometimes. so when I'm not accepted at work I feel so helpless. =(

I guess the only thing to do is to prove them wrong, but in my case i couldn't.

Probably why I felt helpless.

Stupid people are to arrogant to sway, I couldn't do anything about my situation, but maybe you can.
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Old 12-22-2010, 04:34 AM   #14 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Surrender View Post
Not about my work performance. They think that when I've called in sick in the past I've been lying. I spoke to my supervisor about this and she said they have no reason to suspect that I was and I was not calling in excessively. I also overheard her say that she didn't like me after I e-mailed her about the above though.
I tend to get very anxious in confrontational situations and when I met with her I was nervous as all hell so maybe I seemed like a whiner. No clue.
Your over thinking the issue, sending the email just made your supervisor more suspicious. I think you are to concerned about what people are thinking and in turn this is causing them to gossip, people are always very suspicious of anxious persons.

When you start questioning how what people might think of you, they suspect your are trying to hide something from them. I know it difficult for us SA types but try to relax and be open.

Try developing a personal relationship with your supervisor\co-workers then just people you work with. Show some interest in their personal life's and tell them about your self. It's always more difficult to lay someone off if they know more about you then just some anonymous person.
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Old 12-22-2010, 07:31 AM   #15 (permalink)
 
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I just ignore them, which is partly what would have caused it in the first place, continue with my folly, sometimes try to make a different impression and mend things then find I cannot keep it up.
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Old 12-22-2010, 07:35 AM   #16 (permalink)
 
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I was in the same position at my last vet clinic. It got VERY hard to ignore because it had escalated to turning off my oxygen during surgery or switching out my injectable drugs, falsifying records in MY name.
Did I speak to my supervisor? Absolutely and what was I told, "You guys are just going to have to police yourselves."
So, I DID quit. Took two weeks for myself and was hired by another vet clinic by the end of the month
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Old 12-22-2010, 08:25 AM   #17 (permalink)
 
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Sorry to hear that. I'd start looking for a second job, maybe a part-time one, so you'll have backup if they can you.
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Old 12-22-2010, 09:07 AM   #18 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by heroin View Post
Don't like them back, and do your job well. If you are not a drain on the workplace's resources/money (i.e. you produce more output to keep the employer's margin at an acceptable level), you probably won't be fired.

As for the liking part, don't let that bother you. And if they actively attempt to display their dislike of you, you can exhibit your own dislike for them as well.
This. Honestly, it's what I would do too if I were in your shoes.

In the meantime if you are seriously worried about being let go, look around for other jobs.

Sorry you're having to put up with this.
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Old 12-22-2010, 03:36 PM   #19 (permalink)
 
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Originally Posted by SilentOutcast View Post
Your over thinking the issue, sending the email just made your supervisor more suspicious. I think you are to concerned about what people are thinking and in turn this is causing them to gossip, people are always very suspicious of anxious persons.

When you start questioning how what people might think of you, they suspect your are trying to hide something from them. I know it difficult for us SA types but try to relax and be open.

Try developing a personal relationship with your supervisor\co-workers then just people you work with. Show some interest in their personal life's and tell them about your self. It's always more difficult to lay someone off if they know more about you then just some anonymous person.
I think you are dead on. How would you suggest going about getting to know someone you only have impersonal work related conversations with? (I mean just to get the work done).
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Old 12-22-2010, 05:02 PM   #20 (permalink)
 
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People who are bored and unhappy in their own lives need to focus on disliking and gossiping about other people. Trust me, if you are around gossipers, its not just you they talk about, its everyone :P
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