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Old 07-30-2010, 01:47 AM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Default So my boss told me to "**** off" today

I work at my local Walmart, in the produce dept, been there for almost two years.So i go in today and meet my manager in the backroom, at first he pisses and moans about why i didnt bring my clock in card and how everyone else forgot theirs.So i ask him how his days going and he says "**** off Rowland", i was shocked and didnt know what to do, after he said he was just "messin" with me.But it offended me and it was innappropriate.I think he thought i was being sarcastic or something, but i wasnt.So i went to the people manager and talked to her and her jaw hit the floor, she said that was not good.So she wanted to know if we could bring my boss in and talk to him, but i said i wasnt comfortable about it.So she said well we have to address this and to think it over and if you want to get together with her tomorrow and bring in my manager we could.So yeah im just flabbergasted, im a very hard and conciencious worker and a quiet guy who just does his job.For a few weeks now ive felt that his treatment of me hasnt been "right" and something was just different.
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Old 07-30-2010, 02:02 AM   #2 (permalink)
 
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That's unfortunate. It's more likely he didn't mean what he said, in my opinion. He probably was not having a good day/week/month and made a mistake by snapping at you.
That doesn't mean it's okay, and he should give you a genuine apology. Plus, good for you, for not taking his insult lying down. You stood up for yourself when you felt disrespected, and that takes a lot of courage.
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Old 07-30-2010, 02:18 AM   #3 (permalink)
 
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Maybe buy him some chocolate and a good ole candy cane.
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Old 07-30-2010, 02:19 AM   #4 (permalink)
 
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The people manager said do you want to bring him into the room and talk with him with her in the room.She said think about it and get back to her tomorrow.I feel really nervous about doing it, but i cant let it slide, what he said was unprofessional and dissrespectful.Was it his sense of humor? i dont know but i didnt find it funny.
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Old 07-30-2010, 03:40 AM   #5 (permalink)
 
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It doesn't sound like he meant it. You might face more problems now with the politics at those sorts of places. He'll be pissed that you sqealed, and ***** to everyone etc. I've seen it before.

I'd probably not involve him in the meeting. I'd tell the boss that you think it will make your work environment uncomfortable if he finds out. Just tell her that you'll let her know if the behaviour continues... and yeah, if it does, screw him (not literally)!

That's what I'd do anyway.
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Old 07-30-2010, 03:59 AM   #6 (permalink)
 
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The people manager should not involve you in her discussion with your manager. If you really feel that she should talk to him, tell her that you're uncomfortable with participating and that she should address it with him, without you. He may have something personal going on that will explain his behavior, and you don't need to know about it being his direct report. It's possible he's having a bad day, but it's unacceptable. He is not allowed to talk to you in that manner, and he needs a warning.
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Old 08-03-2010, 04:34 PM   #7 (permalink)
 
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So yeah the next day i went in and talked to the people manager again and told her im still uncomfortable with her bringing my manager in with me and talking to her.I said if anything happens again i would see her and let her know.So yeah i went to talk to my boss, my boss is a big italian guy and loud so hes pretty intimidating to say the least.I said to him i didnt appreciate him telling me to "**** off" when i asked him how his day was going.He totally denied saying it, and said you must be hearing things, but he clearly said it.The later he said he might have said **** you in a joking type of way but he wasnt being serious.The he said our relationship is pretty friendly at the moment and that if i wanted it to change he could make it so that he would give me more trouble and heck for things that i dont do well etc.I said to him i have nothing against him personally but i took as an insult and thought he owed me an appology.I said i was sorry i took it personally but it came across as not funny and i felt dissrespected.He had no remorse and said i should have went to him first and not to consult the people manager first.In hindsight i probably should have went to him first but i just wanted someone elses opinion first.
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Old 08-03-2010, 04:42 PM   #8 (permalink)
 
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This guy sounds like a real douche.
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Old 08-03-2010, 04:45 PM   #9 (permalink)
 
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Is this your boss?

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Old 08-03-2010, 04:56 PM   #10 (permalink)
 
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Other people in my dept have had problems with him also, so im not the only one.
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Old 08-03-2010, 04:58 PM   #11 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rko74 View Post
So yeah the next day i went in and talked to the people manager again and told her im still uncomfortable with her bringing my manager in with me and talking to her.I said if anything happens again i would see her and let her know.So yeah i went to talk to my boss, my boss is a big italian guy and loud so hes pretty intimidating to say the least.I said to him i didnt appreciate him telling me to "**** off" when i asked him how his day was going.He totally denied saying it, and said you must be hearing things, but he clearly said it.The later he said he might have said **** you in a joking type of way but he wasnt being serious.The he said our relationship is pretty friendly at the moment and that if i wanted it to change he could make it so that he would give me more trouble and heck for things that i dont do well etc.I said to him i have nothing against him personally but i took as an insult and thought he owed me an appology.I said i was sorry i took it personally but it came across as not funny and i felt dissrespected.He had no remorse and said i should have went to him first and not to consult the people manager first.In hindsight i probably should have went to him first but i just wanted someone elses opinion first.

Yeah, that's the funny thing about anxiety, we are always questioning if we have the right to feel the way we do. I personally would have done something similiar myself. I wouldn't have gone to him first because he seems unapproachable. I definitely think if his attitude and bad behavior continue you should go back to the people manager. Let him know that you are calling his bluff. Worst case scenario (lets hope this doesn't happen) you can claim a hostile work environment and have them pay you unemployment while you look for your next job.
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Old 08-03-2010, 05:55 PM   #12 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rko74 View Post
he said our relationship is pretty friendly at the moment and that if i wanted it to change he could make it so that he would give me more trouble and heck for things that i dont do well etc.
After a comment like that, I think you should go back to your peoples manager and drag this guy through the mud as much as possible. He could have just apologized but instead he threatens you even more. Seriously, eff him!
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Old 08-08-2010, 07:38 AM   #13 (permalink)
 
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Your boss was clearly angry/upset. Your question. How is your day going? was not appropriate.

Another example

A: My wife just died
B: How is your day going?
A: F$#% off! Isn't it obvious!!!
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Old 08-08-2010, 09:16 AM   #14 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mbp86 View Post
is this your boss?

how is my day going!?
I'll tell you how my day is going!
**** off!
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Old 08-08-2010, 09:42 AM   #15 (permalink)
 
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yes its not easy getting a job when you have sa and sometimes you just have to bite your tounge when your boss insults you.Sometimes you just have just got to get on with it and dont let it affect you and think of the money you need to pay your bills.
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Old 08-08-2010, 09:49 AM   #16 (permalink)
 
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Wow, I'm sorry today. Don't blame yourself but I know how you feel because I work and I'm in close contact with my supervisors and managers. It's best to just nod empathetically when their complaining to you and stay out of their way.
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Old 08-08-2010, 09:49 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ItemEleven View Post
Your boss was clearly angry/upset. Your question. How is your day going? was not appropriate.

Another example

A: My wife just died
B: How is your day going?
A: F$#% off! Isn't it obvious!!!
Yep. OP you were in the wrong here buddy. Total overeaction to a situation. He said "**** off" to you because he feels comfortable around you. It wasn't a personal attack, it was a friendly jab for a jab which you started.
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Old 08-08-2010, 11:02 AM   #18 (permalink)
 
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f**k off rowland!!
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