Showing interest in other people - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-01-2009, 08:06 PM Thread Starter
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Showing interest in other people

How many of you generally don't show any interest in other people?

I know that if I started asking people questions and trying to get to know them then I'd be coming off as fake. I don't find other people interesting and I don't have any interest in getting to know them.
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post #2 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-01-2009, 08:17 PM
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you mean to tell me there isnt a single person you have ever run across that you would like to get to know further??i admit, most people bore me but a few interest me...
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post #3 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-01-2009, 08:24 PM
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Yeah, I'm pretty much the same way. I'm really not all that interested in other people. I wish I were. I wish I could get excited at the thought of meeting new people and making new friends. I don't know if I feel this way because I genuinely dislike most people or because I'm so insecure with myself that I automatically reject them before they have the opportunity to reject me.
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post #4 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-01-2009, 08:28 PM
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For me it depends on the person.

If it is someone that will be a part of my life in the future, say my girlfriend or a neighbor for example, then I do try to get to know them. Yet if it is just someone that I probably would not really be friends with or have any reason to get to know, then I tend to not be so willing to get into a conversation with them.

Also, for some reason when I meet someone who I find interesting, I'm always too nervous to talk to them.



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post #5 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 06:40 AM
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Originally Posted by numero1 View Post
How many of you generally don't show any interest in other people?

I know that if I started asking people questions and trying to get to know them then I'd be coming off as fake. I don't find other people interesting and I don't have any interest in getting to know them.
haha normally i don't give a **** about others, unless i can sense they are trully honest which is REAAALLY hard to find, but unless i get that from a person i dont give a **** about gettin to know them
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post #6 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 09:51 AM
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It depends on the type of person for me. If someone's done something I highly admire, or is generally a friendly nice trustworthy kind of person then I tend to feel interested in them. When it comes to people I find rude, big headed or unpleasant in some way then I tend not to be interested.
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post #7 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 09:53 AM
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I never show interest in other people. Now sometimes I am interested, but keep to myself generally, I can't handle rejection and avoid it whenever possible.
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post #8 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 10:21 AM
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Meh I try to act interested, even when I'm not _really_ interested, it's hard though, unless it's something I know a lot about it'll be just them doing the talking and me saying stuff like 'Why did you do X', 'How did you do Y' etc.

What do I really want...
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post #9 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 10:36 AM
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Well i dont show much interest in other people like i see all this students in my school and class and all seem all happey happey preppi fun loving guys that like normal things that teens like do normal things that teen likes and well nothing seem interesting about them.and i hate all this teen trends like smoking alcohol partys getting a car all this stuff seems too much generic and unintresting and they wouldnt understand the stuff i like also.and the people i actually am intrested seem to have some kind of social circle that i feel like i would never become part of it and they dont seem to be realy intrested.
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post #10 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 01:12 PM
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Anyone get this?

Someone asks you "what did you do for the weekend?" and i'm fully concentrated on what i'm saying and answer "bla...bla..bla..and what about yourself?" suddenly they start talking and i'm not hearing anything, i'm still thinking about how i answered and can't pay attention to what the hell their saying and just nod saying "yeah, yeah" even though i'm not hearing anything

I don't even mean it it just happens
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post #11 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 01:15 PM
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I am attracted to the weird and the strange. If an average person walks up to me and starts complaining about their day I couldn't care less... But if someone is in a strange situation, I might ask questions to find out more.

For the most part I only care about myself, I know that's kind of mean... But I deal with my life, everyone else should deal with theirs. Live and let live.

I like to talk to people with SA, just because I like to compare situations and try to gain knowledge from it.

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post #12 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 01:24 PM
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I have this extremely irritating habit of asking too many questions about the other person/everything. But not everyone though - only people I am comfortable with and/or people I find interesting (alot of the times, it's culture-related stuff e.g accents, ethnicity, name meanings etc).

Even if someone were to tell me about their weekend, I will generally be interested and ask questions about it. Not necessarily because of small talk but I generally find other people far more fascinating than myself.
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post #13 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 01:25 PM
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I think I understand what you mean. The problem for me is that I can't find any people that I have anything in common with, therefore they're not interesting to me. It just makes it really hard to me to make small talk because I can't relate to them. It's just resulted in me avoiding people, which I know isn't right. But I'd rather that than having to end up in awkward and uncomfortable situations where I have to pretend to be interested and be on my toes to think of something normal to say.
Same for me too.
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post #14 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 01:39 PM
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I am attracted to the weird and the strange. If an average person walks up to me and starts complaining about their day I couldn't care less...
same here, normal ppl bore me
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post #15 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 01:55 PM
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Yeah, I only find interest in people if they have common interests as me, or if they try to get to know me then I might find some interest.
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post #16 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 02:31 PM
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I think I understand what you mean. The problem for me is that I can't find any people that I have anything in common with, therefore they're not interesting to me. It just makes it really hard to me to make small talk because I can't relate to them.
Same here. I feel like I never have anything in common with people, so most of the time I don't put in the effort to make friends and meet people. Unfortunately, even when I do make friends, I get bored with them very easily.
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post #17 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 06:32 PM
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Sometimes I am genuinly interested in what someone has to say but I'm too afraid to say anything or I'm worried if it would be rude to ask them a question when they technically weren't talking to me. Most of the time, I'm just cordial and listen even if the subject matter is boring. Everyone just seems like a carbon copy of everyone else, especially since in high everyone is trying to be cool so they all have to like the same thing. This generally makes it hard for me to relate to others conversation. Showing genuine emotion is also difficult for me. Even if I'm interested, I have this stoic look on face and people take it as I'm bored and ignore me.
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post #18 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 08:05 PM
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I have that horrible problem that even people that I like and have interest in I can't talk to them, I can't show them I am interested in knowing them when I am.
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post #19 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 09:56 PM
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People bore me a lot, but there are people who I come across every once in a while that I am interested in and they keep my interest. I often find people who interest me in the beginning and then they start boring me, so I cut contact. It's bad, but I can't fake interest.
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post #20 of 27 (permalink) Old 11-02-2009, 10:39 PM
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Most people have something about them that interests me one way or another, but cutting through all of that social dross to find it is often like searching for a needle in a haystack.
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