I'm feel so lonely and miserable... - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 8 (permalink) Old 12-20-2010, 07:45 AM Thread Starter
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I'm feel so lonely and miserable...

Hey guys i just need to vent a bit if you can stick with me, i'll try to keep it short.

Lately i've been thinking about my past and can't help but feel like i could have done so much better. The only thing i can think of are the people who have given me a hard time and never gave me a fair chance.

All through primary and high school i was made fun of or completely ignored, i spent my whole school life sitting off in the background somewhere with my head down doing my work in the hope no one would notice me. Never started any trouble, never bad mouthed anyone, never spoke bad of anyone, always polite and nice but people seem to look at me and treat me like a nothing. The worse day was the last day of school when they were giving awards to people for various things and i ended up winning the "Never smiles" award.

After highschool i did sign up for college however i only lasted 2 weeks and i couldn't handle it anymore and left.

My first job i landed i was harrassed by a co-worker to the point where work place standards got involved because the boss wouldn't do anything even when he started to get violent.

My second job i worked in a warehouse yet i was called into the bosses office constantly because i wasn't "happy enough" and he told me to think about how i can improve myself because i was to quiet ( in a warehouse ?)

It's been quite a few months now since i lost my job, i haven't left the house at all, i don't have contact with anyone but my parents on a day to day basis, answering the damn phone has even become to much for me and i don't know what to do.

It's gotten to the point where i'm sitting up at 3-4 in the morning in tears wondering how i left my life go to ****.

I just want to be normal, get my drivers license, have a job, have a couple of friends to hang out with that's it however i can't bring myself to achieve any of it, fear of failure or screwing up holds me back and i'm paranoid that my family see me as a failure because i haven't accomplished anything in life which is destroying me.

I'm 19 now and i want to start getting my life back on track, if you guys have any advice on how i can start bringing myself back into society after 7 months of iscolation would be much appreciated, i'm sick of my SA controlling me.
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post #2 of 8 (permalink) Old 12-20-2010, 07:52 AM
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I don't have a solution to your problem, but I just want to say that I greatly understand what you're going through, so you're not alone. I'm going through the same thing. If you want a friend, feel free to pm me, okay?
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post #3 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-02-2011, 12:36 AM
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I know this is an old post but I just came across it and it sounded so much like me. I, unfortunately can't offer advice, just support. My problem originally started because I'm an only child, a very sheltered only child at that.

I don't know what to do anymore...I've become very unhappy. Anyway, I hope you and I both can eventually overcome this.
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post #4 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-02-2011, 01:05 AM
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and books.. there's tons of answers and information in books. seriously everyone would be much better off if they read the right books

feel free to message me if you'd like me to share what helpful things I've learned with you
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post #5 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-02-2011, 01:23 AM
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I have the same tendency sometimes to dwell on mistakes of the past, thinking about opportunities I missed in high school, etc. Look back and see what you don't like, but realize that what's done is done and you can only affect what happens next, learning from your mistakes.

At the risk of sounding cheesy and nerdy, there's a good Star Trek TNG episode revolving around this topic. It's about a character who goes back in the past to fix his errors -- however, after doing so, he sees himself become a completely different, weaker person in the future as a result. A quote from it: "There are many parts of my youth I'm not proud of. There were loose threads, untidy parts of me that I'd like to remove. But when I pulled on one of those threads, it unraveled the tapestry of my life." In other words: your mistakes are part of who you are, maybe you needed to make them to give you a wake up call. So try not to get too caught up in regrets -- instead, start taking steps to avoid making the same mistakes again.
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post #6 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-02-2011, 04:24 AM
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Red face

I have so been there. it is definitely hard! I would sit there and cry and cry thinking that I can't stand my emotions, how will anyone be able to put up with me? Honestly the only thing that really helped me was praying, and reading self help books. Knowing that I had the most important person behind me for support (God) was enough to help me survive. i actually didn't get my license until I was 21, and I almost thought I was going to either faint or run screaming from the dmv from my SA. But I made it. And after that I kept praying vehemently for the other things in my life, and was provided for and blessed again. I met the man of my dreams and three months ago I actually got married! Which I thought would never happen!! Don't ever give up or lose faith. If you aren't a religious person, find some sort of thing to draw strength from for yourself and it will help you to make it through when you didn't think you could.
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post #7 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-02-2011, 04:37 AM
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I couldn't get a job before because I didn't make an imression of a social out-going person. Apparently they want someone with a bright smile and a talkative happy attitude. I'm bad at faking it. My eyes look sad no matter what. I guess, the only way to get a job is to actually become happy inside, so that means starting to fix other things in life that aren't working.
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post #8 of 8 (permalink) Old 06-02-2011, 04:42 AM
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I could have written this, except I'm 9 years older.
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