Humiliated at work - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-09-2008, 04:53 AM Thread Starter
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Humiliated at work

OK, so where i work, a daily part of my job is to sign for parcels and let the relevant person know they've arrived. So this morning a parcel arrived for one of my colleagues and i was supposed to let him know, so i walked round to his desk, only to realise he isn't around. It is a small but open plan office so the guy who sits to next to him sees me looking around and asks me who i'm after. I tell him but he doesn't hear me because my voice is quiet and unheard by the sound of the radio they have on. At this point my SA kicks in and i have to repeat myself not once but twice, at which point my supervisor buts in from across the room and says, "What team is <insert name of colleague i'm looking for here> part of, Sarah?" Now i'm so nervous my mind goes completely blank and i just stand there looking at her like a rabbit caught in headlights, unable to think. She asks me again and i try to say, "I don't know" but my voice comes out as a weak mumble so she just answers the question for me: "He's part of <insert name of another colleague>'s team, so you need to tell him." It wouldn't have been so bad if i'd have known she was only trying to help me, but she wasn't, she said it in such a condescending manner, like i was stupid, and half of my colleagues saw it too. I could feel my eyes tearing up as i walked away and when i got back to my desk, much as i tried not to, i let one or two out

This happened a few hours ago now but i still can't stop thinking about it. Now i have confirmed everyone's general opinion of me as a pathetic useless idiot
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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-09-2008, 06:08 AM
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Re: Humiliated at work

This has happened to me before, albeit it was in a school. I know how you're feeling right now. My advice would be to talk about what happened to some supportive and who knows about your SA.
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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-09-2008, 07:42 AM
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Re: Humiliated at work

When something like this happens to us, we always assume someone is thinking the worse, your right, sometimes they are, but, I think this has happened to everyone, even those that don't have SA, people forget what they were going to say, what they were going to write, where they were going, miss turns, you name it.
If she meant this in a condescending form, she has the problem, no empathy, really situations like this do happen to everyone unless you're perfect. But when were in the situation we only look at how badly we screwed up.

It's over, it's done, if this person is thinking negative thoughts, beep, her problem;-) so, you got confused......That doesn't mean you're stupid, that doesn't mean anything, other than you got confused;-)

Mental illness is what some have, not who they are.
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-09-2008, 09:12 AM
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Re: Humiliated at work

I also have SA, obviously, but on top of that, I'm also a very hateful person. Here's what I'd do: Just sit and observe everything she says and wait for her to say something where you can pounce on and be condescending and mean right back towards her. This may be tough with SA to speak up in such a manner, but if you get the hate a-flowin it could be worth it.

lol that's probably not going to help your work relationships but whatever it's a price to be paid for redemption. Plus the other workers with a soul will respect you more for standing up to the office bee-awtch.

When little kids laugh, that's the best - because they can't lie yet. They can't pretend to laugh like other people.
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 10-09-2008, 09:18 AM
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Re: Humiliated at work

Yeah people with SA usually feel like everyone saw and heard what was going on and laughing at you but most of the time people rarely even notice what's happening. I know that sucks. It happened to me many times in school and out places. I have to repeat my self because I lack confidence and talk quiet. I don't know what else to say but that you aren't a pathetic loser. Things happen and that person is an ***. Or maybe they didn't intentionally try and make you feel bad?
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