How to stop worsening SA

[Banzai]

Hi all,
Recently, my SA has taken a sudden dip. Today, for the first time ever, I showed the symptom of sweating whilst doing a presentation in front of class. Normally, I don't really show many symptoms whilst doing a presentation apart from stiffness, lack of eye contact and again, recently, "jittering".
I've also started sweating for other social situations as well such as doing grocery shopping by myself.

I really dont' know what to do. Right now, it's not like I can't do a presentation, go grocery shopping etc - if I have to, I will. It seems, everytime I get myself into things like that/"face my fear", my SA just gets worse but yet, if I just leave it, my SA will also just get worse.

Any advice?

[rincewind]

Are you feeling ill at all? If you're in the early stages of flu or something that might be making you feel worse than normal and explain some of the symptoms you described. Or has anything major changed in your personal life recently that could have affected your moods?

I think the best thing you can do is persevere and hope things improve again soon. It can be so easy to talk yourself out of doing things that exacerbate SA and if you get into a habit of avoiding them it just makes it harder to re-expose yourself to them in the future.

[shadowmask]

Are you in any kind of therapy?

[Banzai]

Originally Posted by rincewind

Are you feeling ill at all? If you're in the early stages of flu or something that might be making you feel worse than normal and explain some of the symptoms you described. Or has anything major changed in your personal life recently that could have affected your moods?

I think the best thing you can do is persevere and hope things improve again soon. It can be so easy to talk yourself out of doing things that exacerbate SA and if you get into a habit of avoiding them it just makes it harder to re-expose yourself to them in the future.

No. It's been getting noticeably worse since about a few months ago. As for events, I think whilst doing my GCSEs, that changed me alot. But even then (not sure how far back), I found it extremely difficult to do any sort of presentation in front of class. I seemed to get alot more nervous than the average person.

Originally Posted by shadowmask

Are you in any kind of therapy?

No. Therapy isn't really an option for me. The problem is, I can do presentations, I can go grocery shopping, I can have conversations with people etc so my SA is not "bad enough" to get any treatment, especially on the NHS. I fear that some time soon, I will become completely SA flooded.

[shadowmask]

You could try to find some books regarding CBT or other techniques and exercises for helping to control SA. You could also start taking supplements and exercising, if you're not already.

[rincewind]

Originally Posted by Banzai

No. It's been getting noticeably worse since about a few months ago. As for events, I think whilst doing my GCSEs, that changed me alot. But even then (not sure how far back), I found it extremely difficult to do any sort of presentation in front of class. I seemed to get alot more nervous than the average person.

Well, anyone with SA is going to have more problems doing presentations than an average person, I certainly do! The only advice I can offer there is that it does get slightly easier with practice, and even people who are normally very confident can get nervous before and during presentations, I've seen it happen many times. In my experience there are very few people who are naturally comfortable with public speaking, most people have to learn it slowly and painfully.

Originally Posted by Banzai

No. Therapy isn't really an option for me. The problem is, I can do presentations, I can go grocery shopping, I can have conversations with people etc so my SA is not "bad enough" to get any treatment, especially on the NHS. I fear that some time soon, I will become completely SA flooded.

Are you taking any sort of medication (eg anti-depressants)? I've never talked to a GP about social anxiety for similar reasons to you, but I knew I was depressed and it was closely linked to my SA, so I talked to him about that instead. I'm now taking AD medication, and my hope is that treating the depression will also reduce my levels of anxiety. If you feel anything like that it might be worth doing the same thing.

Originally Posted by shadowmask

You could also start taking supplements and exercising, if you're not already.

This is a good suggestion. I do a lot of cycling and it always makes me feel a bit better to get outside and burn off some energy after sitting in front of a computer all day at work

[Banzai]

Originally Posted by rincewind

Well, anyone with SA is going to have more problems doing presentations than an average person, I certainly do! The only advice I can offer there is that it does get slightly easier with practice, and even people who are normally very confident can get nervous before and during presentations, I've seen it happen many times. In my experience there are very few people who are naturally comfortable with public speaking, most people have to learn it slowly and painfully.

Sorry if I did not make myself very clear but that is my problem - I seem to be getting worse with practice. Everytime I do a presentation, I will show worse symtpoms than before. It's the same with everythign else.

Originally Posted by shadowmask

You could try to find some books regarding CBT or other techniques and exercises for helping to control SA.

Any suggestions for a light SA sufferer?

[rincewind]

Originally Posted by Banzai

Sorry if I did not make myself very clear but that is my problem - I seem to be getting worse with practice. Everytime I do a presentation, I will show worse symtpoms than before. It's the same with everythign else.

What are you thinking about during the presentations that is causing these reactions? Are you worrying about how good your presenation is, or how people are reacting to it, or something else? It usually helps me when I feel very confident about the material I have to present than it does when I'm unsure about bits of it and/or haven't had much time to prepare.

[Banzai]

Originally Posted by rincewind

What are you thinking about during the presentations that is causing these reactions? Are you worrying about how good your presenation is, or how people are reacting to it, or something else? It usually helps me when I feel very confident about the material I have to present than it does when I'm unsure about bits of it and/or haven't had much time to prepare.

I guess... it was just the fact that everyone was staring at me. I don't really know why though...

[rincewind]

Originally Posted by Banzai

I guess... it was just the fact that everyone was staring at me. I don't really know why though...

It sounds quite unusual, I don't think I've ever had anything like this happen to me...my SA in any given situation has either gradually improved over time or remained relatively constant. Have you been giving these presentations in front of the same group of people all this time?

[tutliputli]

The good thing is that your SA doesn't sound severe, but you may be at the stage where you want to think about getting some help. Don't feel like your problem is too small to see a doctor. If you leave things as they are, unchecked, they may well get worse. By the way, it's amazing that you did the presentation! You should feel great about that.

[Banzai]

Originally Posted by rincewind

It sounds quite unusual, I don't think I've ever had anything like this happen to me...my SA in any given situation has either gradually improved over time or remained relatively constant. Have you been giving these presentations in front of the same group of people all this time?

I think it's because I'm at the stage where I was [quite] normal and then suddenly started to get SA and then it goes downhill from there...so perhaps you were like that when you first got SA?

Originally Posted by tutliputli

The good thing is that your SA doesn't sound severe, but you may be at the stage where you want to think about getting some help. Don't feel like your problem is too small to see a doctor. If you leave things as they are, unchecked, they may well get worse. By the way, it's amazing that you did the presentation! You should feel great about that.

Thanks - I can do pretty much everything, just not very well

[rincewind]

Originally Posted by Banzai

I think it's because I'm at the stage where I was [quite] normal and then suddenly started to get SA and then it goes downhill from there...so perhaps you were like that when you first got SA?

This is a very good point...I'm so used to thinking of myself as having SA that I didn't even consider what it was like when I first started to develop it. That would have been about 15 years ago now so I don't remember it in detail (and I don't think I had many presentations to do at that age!), but I do recall gradually becoming more and more isolated from my friends over the course of a few months. For example, we used to go out and play football almost every day after school, but I started making excuses not to go out when friends called at my house, and eventually they just stopped coming round altogether.

Unfortunately since I'm still dealing with the same problems after all this time I obviously can't give you any useful advice based on what happened to me...all I can suggest is to not give up and keep making the effort to do the things you're having difficulty with. You also have the advantage of being able to understand what you are feeling to some extent, I had no idea about "social anxiety" when I was younger and just knew I was happier being alone and avoiding social situations. If I'd had somewhere like this to get information and advice I may have been better off than I was.

[Banzai]

Originally Posted by rincewind

This is a very good point...I'm so used to thinking of myself as having SA that I didn't even consider what it was like when I first started to develop it. That would have been about 15 years ago now so I don't remember it in detail (and I don't think I had many presentations to do at that age!), but I do recall gradually becoming more and more isolated from my friends over the course of a few months. For example, we used to go out and play football almost every day after school, but I started making excuses not to go out when friends called at my house, and eventually they just stopped coming round altogether. .

I can relate to all of this recently as well. Since finishing secondary school, I have not met up with a single friend, let alone attend a "reunion" type outing. Even before then, I gradually stopped attending any outings/communicating with friends.

[rincewind]

Originally Posted by Banzai

I can relate to all of this recently as well. Since finishing secondary school, I have not met up with a single friend, let alone attend a "reunion" type outing. Even before then, I gradually stopped attending any outings/communicating with friends.

In my experience once you start retreating from people like this it's an extremely difficult process to reverse, and the result can be to make it almost impossible to make new friends even when you actively want to do so
If you haven't been keeping in contact with your old school friends, have you been able to meet anyone new at college? I had opportunities to make new friends when I started at university and still wish I'd taken them, but I took the easy way out instead and ended up hanging around alone for years.