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Old 10-07-2012, 11:49 AM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Default How to react when people assume or call me gay.

I'd like to firstly say I have nothing against homosexuality. I think everyone is entitled to live the life they want.

So my problem is, some people that I've met and in my old high school think I'm gay. My friend told me that I shouldn't overreact if they call my gay because people that do that are gay themselves and are hiding it, and are insecure about themselves. Now, as a straight man, I find it offensive to be called gay. If someone asked me if I was gay, I'd reply by saying "no". but I would still get slightly offended. So I don't know if I should believe her or not. I mean, there are those stereotypical "macho" guys that would say "if anyone called me a gay ***, I would kick their ***." Isn't that overreacting too? Why can't I be mad and frustrated that some people have called me gay?

I'm a very misunderstood person that has social anxiety. No one understands and I'm trying to understand myself. I also have commitment issues and I'm a complicated person. I'm 20 years of age by the way.

I don't fit the stereotypical guy image but I'm not too feminine either. I'm tall, thin, introverted, and a nice genuine guy. I don't walk feminine, I don't talk feminine either. I do speak proper English though, not slang or vulgar. I'm not a fan of Britney Spears, Madonna, or Lady Gaga. I also do paint my nails or have manicures or wax my eyebrows. And personally, the thought of marrying another male and having sex with him bothers me. I want to get married, have children of my own, and be a father and for my children to have a mother. I'm traditional in that aspect I suppose. I've never had a proper girlfriend because I haven't found the right one and I'm also still a virgin.

So I'd like advice as to how I am suppose to act when some people call me gay? Thanks. I'll take all your answers and advice in consideration.
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Old 10-07-2012, 11:53 AM   #2 (permalink)
 
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woops, I meant to say "I don't paint my nails". Sorry, how can I edit my post? I'm new to this.
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Old 10-07-2012, 01:26 PM   #3 (permalink)
 
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woops, I meant to say "I don't paint my nails". Sorry, how can I edit my post? I'm new to this.
Good thing you mentioned that, I had a WTF moment midway through reading your post, lol (not that I have anything against guys that paint their nails and wax their eyebrows but it seemed inconsistent with the rest of your topic)

I think I know where you're coming from, people also ask me if I'm gay from time to time. Personally I just say "no, I'm not" and move on with my life, but I can see how it would get very irritating when you get asked that question over and over again. I think you should try and get less offended - remember you are the only one who gets to choose who you have sex/build a family with, so if you don't like men, fear not, you'll never be with one.

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My friend told me that I shouldn't overreact if they call my gay because people that do that are gay themselves and are hiding it, and are insecure about themselves.
Well, I guess it depends on how you define "overreact". Sure, if you start blushing and denying it when people ask you if you're gay, that's gonna raise a few eyebrows. And if you explode and kick the guy's ***, people will think you're dangerous instead. Really, the best course of action is to politely say no, and walk away calmly.

One thing you can do is if a guy asks you, answer "no, I'm not interested in men, glad we cleared that up *smile*", that'll piss'em off while remaining appropriate. If a girl asks you, well, improvise (perhaps she's secretly anxious and wants to talk to you!!)

Also, did you consider the possibility that this might just be a running joke on you, like someone posted online how you were doing the kinkiest gay **** in town or whatnot? How long has this been going on for?
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Old 10-07-2012, 01:31 PM   #4 (permalink)
 
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There's one problem with this world they criticize people too much, and they don't even know them from race, looks, actions to wealth. This is why humans gonna kill the economy gang related style.
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Old 10-07-2012, 01:34 PM   #5 (permalink)
 
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Just correct them and tell them that you're straight. I've never had people call me gay, but I guess it would get under my skin if people continually made that mistake.
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Old 10-08-2012, 03:48 AM   #6 (permalink)
 
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It used to happen to me, too. Being a little perverted seemed to have worked. Also, some of them know I like a girl.
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