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Old 07-04-2012, 11:33 AM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Exclamation Get extremely nervous around this girl

Since meeting this girl a few months ago, I've been getting really bad anxiety. So bad that my appetite shuts down time to time (I've lost 30 lbs and I was already thin). When we hang out I will go through these 3 minute panic attacks and will sometimes have to excuse myself and go throw up somewhere.

This is someone I see a lot and do hang out with. We hung out the whole day a few days ago everything went well I did get those 3 minutes urges where I felt like I had to throw up but didn't do it. By the end of the day when I got home I freaked out started throwing up and would wake up during the night and throw up almost every hour. The next day I broke down and cried a few times and shut down. I have not ate since.

The thing that bothers me the most is that I can't even tell her that I like her, and I sense she likes me and is waiting for me to make an advancement but my crippling anxiety prevents me. I already take 10 mg of lexapro a day and it helps me out in a lot of areas but this is one that it hasn't
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Old 07-04-2012, 12:00 PM   #2 (permalink)
 
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If you like her, and are sure that your vomiting or naseua is from anxiety then I say keep throwing up. You may want to try a benzo for a little relief. Bottom line is if you bail on her and you like her, it WILL be harder the next time you want to get to know someone. Do not give in to the anxiety. Our anxiety is a lie, It is not real. Eventually we all will have to face it if we want to get better. It seems like you have already broken the ice, so the hard part should be about over. I think backing down from the situation you're in will only make it worse in the long run. It's scary, but pushing through the scary times is what will make you better.
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Old 07-04-2012, 12:13 PM   #3 (permalink)
 
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Originally Posted by mrpositivity View Post
Do not give in to the anxiety.
This man knows. Key to everything this piece of advice.
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Old 07-04-2012, 12:29 PM   #4 (permalink)
 
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NOT A STEP BACK ! JUST DO IT,do not let anxiety stop you !!!!!! you will regret it every day....trust me i know what am talking about
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Old 07-04-2012, 01:44 PM   #5 (permalink)
 
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I get really nervous around girls too, some times to the point I cannot even look at them. I never know what to say or do around them.

I wish you the best of luck.
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Old 07-04-2012, 02:43 PM   #6 (permalink)
 
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Honestly, I'd take the pressure off and not plan to ask her out. You're getting an extreme reaction to a completely innocuous situation, she's just a girl, might be hot, but you gotta deal with some things, if you're puking out of nervousness the pressure of a relationship ain't gonna be much help. Tbh, if you're spendin this much time together she probably likes you back. You realise even if she's not interested its not the end of the world, and it really doesn't mean nothing about you, you know how many girls have turned me down? Bout 1 for every 4 doesn't, that's a 25% success rate, get some thick skin son and take it easy on yourself.
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Old 07-04-2012, 06:03 PM   #7 (permalink)
 
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I don't feel like I should back down. I know I need to get some courage and tell her, but I really dont know how to bring it up or what to say.

Lol I know that makes me sound like I'm 12 years old but expressing my feelings has always been rough for me.

I feel if I walk away and never say anything I would never get over it. I've done it once a few years ago and it bothers me still to this day

Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice.
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Old 07-04-2012, 06:14 PM   #8 (permalink)
 
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I wonder that if once you tell her you like her, your anticipatory anxiety about the whole situation will go down....
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Old 07-04-2012, 06:17 PM   #9 (permalink)
 
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I wonder that if once you tell her you like her, your anticipatory anxiety about the whole situation will go down....
I feel like it will even if I don't get the response I want

It's just overcoming that mountain of angst that is in front of me
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Old 07-04-2012, 06:20 PM   #10 (permalink)
 
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I feel that my weight loss is a bigger concern, but I've gone too far with this not to come out with something positive
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Old 07-04-2012, 11:30 PM   #11 (permalink)
 
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I feel like it will even if I don't get the response I want

It's just overcoming that mountain of angst that is in front of me
Well then you know what you gotta do!
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Old 07-04-2012, 11:51 PM   #12 (permalink)
 
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Hang in there buddy and get that girl!!
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Old 07-04-2012, 11:59 PM   #13 (permalink)
 
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She is still sticking around, so that's good (and rare). I used to not be able to talk to girls, and it definitely sucks. Women have a short attention span, so you gotta make a move before another guy comes into the picture. If you think you feel bad now, just wait until that happens!
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Old 07-05-2012, 12:02 AM   #14 (permalink)
 
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Also try to think about how she might view you. Looking through her eyes, do you think she likes you? Or does she just not see you in that way?
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Old 07-05-2012, 11:31 PM   #15 (permalink)
 
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Originally Posted by ThatOneQuietGuy View Post
Also try to think about how she might view you. Looking through her eyes, do you think she likes you? Or does she just not see you in that way?
I sense it. I had someone ask me if we're hooking up today.

It's really the only time my SA is triggered is being around her or knowing that I will be. The lexapro has helped me out everywhere else
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