frustrated that i still live at home with parents and siblings
this has been bugging the crap out of me lately. I think its in the genes to go crazy after the age of 24 if you still live at home with parents and younger siblings. I feel so tied down. i come from a traditional asian family. they expect me to take care of them forever or something. but i'm extremely independent. Why the hell do I want to move out?
1. i won't miss their food, cause they cook unhealthy chinese food and they also buy 10 packages of cookies at a time. I already have gastrointestinal problems that may proliferate into something different, so I need to control my binge eating disorder, i.e emotional eating disorder. i can eat up an excess of 1000 calories at a time. i feel disgusting afterwards. if i lived on my own, i wouldn't be surrounded by all this crappy bad food.
2. They expect me, as the "oldest" in the family, to do EVERYTHING FOR THEM. they're getting older, and they need me to open their door for them, translate things into chinese for them, answer the door for them. My other sisters scathe by with literally no expectations of them whatsoever. Don't ask them to translate, do this or that. don't even bother to ask them cause they can just ask me, right?!.
My parents feel as though i'm the golden child who must obey them and do everything they want from me.
i.e marry a chinese boy
i.e live with them instead of shipping them off to an old folks' home.
As I last recall, they had no expectations of my younger sisters to marry a certain person and to live with them forever and ever. They had no expectations of my sister to go to a CERTAIN university, highschool, junior high-which my parents had inadvertantly pushed me to into!
3. I hate my younger sisters. they are the rudest, most condescending idiots i've EVER met. My sisters make fun of me for everything-"why are you wearing that horrendous shirt?" "brush your hair!" "don't take that job, it's not suitable for you", "eww, you look disgusting", "why are you eating those foods?" it goes on and on and on. They are 20 and 18 respectively, by the way. You would expect them to grow up at this point.
This is a typical conversation between my mother and my sisters. My mother "have you eaten dinner yet?" my sisters: "shut up, don't talk to me." "don't be home late" My sisters "screw you".
I just need autonomy and freedom. That's all I ask for.
but here's the worst part: i THINK i may be the last to move out. why? well, the youngest one is away from home because she attends university. my other sister DOES NOT have any student loans to pay back cause dear old parents paid for hers, but not mine obviously. It will be another year before I can think of practically moving out.
Right now, I only have 3 thousand dollars in my bank account. Also, I will be 25,000 in debt by December, and I am still jobless. Hell its kinda hard to find a job when you health problems (i have to uriante every 20 min), and I have social anxiety(which has made me quit many many jobs before.)
Both of my sisters have more money in their bank account than I do at this point.
If my sister moves out before I do, I will be the only one left with my parents. Not only is this embarassing, but my parents will become sort of "emotionally attached" and even more "clingy" towards me.