Social Anxiety Support

deadwarrior666 · 11-05-2009, 12:19 PM

Sorry for ranting..

Is there a hope for me? AT age of 22... am still where i was.. with no hope of getting mate. My younger bro is going to get married soon to his gf...

it makes me feel so sad

I never had gf.. never even kissed. I feel so f*****ing hopeless now

its driving me insane... i dont desrve this..... do i?

my family keeps taunting me.... and now they have become agressive. they just make fun of me...

they say i will never have a mate... am not worthy.. bull****...

ShyViolet · 11-05-2009, 12:35 PM

If it makes you feel any better I'm 29 and still a virgin.

drealm · 11-05-2009, 12:46 PM

The only way I've been able to avoid sexual frustration is by getting a sufficient amount of hobbies and by being so busy I don't have time to think.

Your family is taunting you about this? That's pretty ****ed up. Sure it's expected from peers, but your own flesh and blood? God damn that ticks me, sorry to hear that man.

And yes there is hope for you. Statistically speaking most SAD guys do eventually get laid at some point in their life. Often it's just later.

Fuzzy Logic · 11-05-2009, 12:50 PM

Your own family? They should be ashamed of themselves.

Medicine Wheel · 11-05-2009, 12:52 PM

I am also 22, virgin, never kiss, or had a GF. The thing I realized was that everyone is not the same. You don't have to follow what everyone else considers the "normal lifestyle." When the time comes you will find someone. If your family is bothering you because of it you need to tell them to leave you alone. If they don't stop do what I did, just distance yourself from them. But its really not that bad being a virgin.

JFmtl · 11-05-2009, 01:00 PM

That your family is tauting you about it is really cheap. As for the loser virgin part, well it's useless to get frustrated and bitter about it, if it has to happen, it will happen someday, otherwise it's not the end of the world, it's possible to live without a girlfriend lol. As Medecine Wheel just said, there is nothing wrong with being a virgin and i could add that being frustrated and obsessed about it sure won't help you to find a mate. We SAers have probably much more work to do about it to be successful in relationships, it is possible as some SA guys are successful in that department, but it's not a life or death thing.

And of course, well, Internet is for porn

deadwarrior666 · 11-05-2009, 01:01 PM

the problem is i get ridiculed during family functions.. they think am biggest looser. they dont understand abt my SA.. they think am insane.

I try to avoid them but... still. it sucks... The problem is in our culture, my younger bro cant get married until i get. so my family is eager tat i should get girl... its frustrating.

flyingspatula · 11-05-2009, 01:20 PM

that sucks about the whole problem with having to get married before your brother.

... but hey, im a virgin loser too and im 20 so don't feel bad. your day will definateily come, you just gotta get yourself out there and available but its HARD with SA so I don't really have any kind of advice other than to just try going out to random places since you can meet potential relationships anywhere.

DitzyDreamer · 11-05-2009, 01:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deadwarrior666

Sorry for ranting..

Is there a hope for me? AT age of 22... am still where i was.. with no hope of getting mate. My younger bro is going to get married soon to his gf...

it makes me feel so sad

I never had gf.. never even kissed. I feel so f*****ing hopeless now

its driving me insane... i dont desrve this..... do i?

my family keeps taunting me.... and now they have become agressive. they just make fun of me...

they say i will never have a mate... am not worthy.. bull****...

No, you don't deserve this. And if I were you, I would have a serious sit-down with that family of yours.

There is nothing wrong with you. You are only 22 years old, and as a men, you don't really have that "biological clock" that ticks.

shadowguy · 11-05-2009, 01:37 PM

Many of us in the same boat. Keep up the hope. All that matters is you're trying. People taunting you is messed up.

Screw what they think.

Emerald3 · 11-05-2009, 01:41 PM

I am also 22, and in my third year and feel so out of my depth. I know it's harmless but the amount of taunting or joking from people I know about not having had a boyfriend or have sex or any contact with a guy.

At uni it's kinda easier than in the 'real' world. And quite a lot more oppotunities but not if you're extremely shay and don't really associate with guys, aswell as scared to actually do anything.

its_a_rick · 11-05-2009, 01:44 PM

Ahwell, if it makes you feel any better I'm in the same boat, I'm 20 at the moment and don't expect anything to change any time soon but you never who you might encounter.

Moon Calf · 11-05-2009, 01:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ShyViolet

If it makes you feel any better I'm 29 and still a virgin.

Wow! Me too.

supersoshychick · 11-05-2009, 01:58 PM

older people are virgins too, your time will come.

Moon Calf · 11-05-2009, 01:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deadwarrior666

Sorry for ranting..

Is there a hope for me? AT age of 22... am still where i was.. with no hope of getting mate. My younger bro is going to get married soon to his gf...

it makes me feel so sad

I never had gf.. never even kissed. I feel so f*****ing hopeless now

its driving me insane... i dont desrve this..... do i?

my family keeps taunting me.... and now they have become agressive. they just make fun of me...

they say i will never have a mate... am not worthy.. bull****...

Maybe this will cheer you up. Jimmy Carr, one of my favorite comedians, didn't lose his virginity until he was twenty-six.

VIncymon · 11-05-2009, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by drealm

The only way I've been able to avoid sexual frustration is by getting a sufficient amount of hobbies and by being so busy I don't have time to think.

Your family is taunting you about this? That's pretty ****ed up. Sure it's expected from peers, but your own flesh and blood? God damn that ticks me, sorry to hear that man.

And yes there is hope for you. Statistically speaking most SAD guys do eventually get laid at some point in their life. Often it's just later.

I agree with the idea about hobbies. Do something you really get a kick out of.

shyvr6 · 11-05-2009, 02:36 PM

Normally, I would be mad at your family, but I guess it's just a part of your culture. If there is no hope in trying to make them understand, I would say to stand up for yourself and let them know that you don't care about their opinion, stop talking to them, or move away.

millenniumman75 · 11-05-2009, 06:04 PM

That is just plain messed up.

.

sadfox · 11-05-2009, 06:14 PM

you may want to try a hooker it will give experience of sex and you wont be a virgin its not ideal but you will at least know that having sex is not all that great not really that big a deal i was 25 when i did and thought is that it i wasnt missing out on that much anyway

XxArmyofOnexX · 11-05-2009, 06:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by iwannabecoolplzhelp

It's time to man up and throw the bone down on some phattie. You're just going to have to get up, go out and talk yourself up until you go up to some hot chica and be like "whats up mamacita wink wink"

Or at least fb or txt or something and tell girls u wanna go out with them. Don't tell them you wanna lay the pipe cuz then they will feel like sluts if they respond even if that's what they want. Just invite them over to watch a movie after dinner then you will be alone and ......... no more virgin dude.

Failing that, hookers might be your only recourse.

nice

11-05-2009, 12:19 PM	#1 (permalink)
deadwarrior666 Status: Richard Dawkins Fan Join Date: May 2009 Location: India, Mumbai Gender: Male Age: 22 Posts: 121	Feel like Loser Virgin.. :( Sorry for ranting.. Is there a hope for me? AT age of 22... am still where i was.. with no hope of getting mate. My younger bro is going to get married soon to his gf... it makes me feel so sad I never had gf.. never even kissed. I feel so f***ing hopeless now its driving me insane... i dont desrve this..... do i? my family keeps taunting me.... and now they have become agressive. they just make fun of me... they say i will never have a mate... am not worthy.. bull**...

11-05-2009, 12:50 PM	#4 (permalink)
Fuzzy Logic Status: SAS Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: United Kingdom, Northern Ireland Gender: Male Age: 23 Posts: 312	Your own family? They should be ashamed of themselves. __________________ “There is but a thin line between madness and genius. I have been trying valiantly to cross it, but I don’t think I’m mad enough yet.”

11-05-2009, 12:52 PM	#5 (permalink)
Medicine Wheel Status: hmm.. Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Tennessee Gender: Male Age: 22 Posts: 258	I am also 22, virgin, never kiss, or had a GF. The thing I realized was that everyone is not the same. You don't have to follow what everyone else considers the "normal lifestyle." When the time comes you will find someone. If your family is bothering you because of it you need to tell them to leave you alone. If they don't stop do what I did, just distance yourself from them. But its really not that bad being a virgin. __________________ i've forgotten how good it could be to feel alive

11-05-2009, 01:00 PM	#6 (permalink)
JFmtl Status: schtroumpf grognon Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Montréal Gender: Male Age: 22 Posts: 1,097	That your family is tauting you about it is really cheap. As for the loser virgin part, well it's useless to get frustrated and bitter about it, if it has to happen, it will happen someday, otherwise it's not the end of the world, it's possible to live without a girlfriend lol. As Medecine Wheel just said, there is nothing wrong with being a virgin and i could add that being frustrated and obsessed about it sure won't help you to find a mate. We SAers have probably much more work to do about it to be successful in relationships, it is possible as some SA guys are successful in that department, but it's not a life or death thing. And of course, well, Internet is for porn __________________ Reverend Lovejoy: Marge, just about everything’s a sin. [holds up a Bible] Y’ever sat down and read this thing? Technically we’re not supposed to go to the bathroom.

11-05-2009, 01:44 PM	#12 (permalink)
its_a_rick Status: So tired... Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Netherlands Gender: Male Age: 20 Posts: 214	Ahwell, if it makes you feel any better I'm in the same boat, I'm 20 at the moment and don't expect anything to change any time soon but you never who you might encounter. __________________ Yummy... boredom.

11-05-2009, 12:35 PM	#2 (permalink)
ShyViolet Status: SAS Member Join Date: Nov 2003 Gender: Female Age: 29 Posts: 1,942	If it makes you feel any better I'm 29 and still a virgin.

11-05-2009, 12:46 PM	#3 (permalink)
drealm Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: California Gender: Male Age: 22 Posts: 292	The only way I've been able to avoid sexual frustration is by getting a sufficient amount of hobbies and by being so busy I don't have time to think. Your family is taunting you about this? That's pretty ****ed up. Sure it's expected from peers, but your own flesh and blood? God damn that ticks me, sorry to hear that man. And yes there is hope for you. Statistically speaking most SAD guys do eventually get laid at some point in their life. Often it's just later.

11-05-2009, 01:01 PM	#7 (permalink)
deadwarrior666 Status: Richard Dawkins Fan Join Date: May 2009 Location: India, Mumbai Gender: Male Age: 22 Posts: 121	the problem is i get ridiculed during family functions.. they think am biggest looser. they dont understand abt my SA.. they think am insane. I try to avoid them but... still. it sucks... The problem is in our culture, my younger bro cant get married until i get. so my family is eager tat i should get girl... its frustrating.

11-05-2009, 01:20 PM	#8 (permalink)
flyingspatula Status: ◄╗Permanently ßanned Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Kansas Gender: Male Age: 20 Posts: 238	that sucks about the whole problem with having to get married before your brother. ... but hey, im a virgin loser too and im 20 so don't feel bad. your day will definateily come, you just gotta get yourself out there and available but its HARD with SA so I don't really have any kind of advice other than to just try going out to random places since you can meet potential relationships anywhere.

11-05-2009, 01:37 PM	#10 (permalink)
shadowguy Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Gender: Male Age: 20 Posts: 30	Many of us in the same boat. Keep up the hope. All that matters is you're trying. People taunting you is messed up. Screw what they think.

11-05-2009, 01:41 PM	#11 (permalink)
Emerald3 Status: Wants to be someone else Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: England Gender: Female Age: 22 Posts: 283	I am also 22, and in my third year and feel so out of my depth. I know it's harmless but the amount of taunting or joking from people I know about not having had a boyfriend or have sex or any contact with a guy. At uni it's kinda easier than in the 'real' world. And quite a lot more oppotunities but not if you're extremely shay and don't really associate with guys, aswell as scared to actually do anything.

11-05-2009, 01:58 PM	#14 (permalink)
supersoshychick Status: supersoshychick Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Paranoia Gender: Female Age: 19 Posts: 202	older people are virgins too, your time will come. __________________ Blog about social anxiety, doraphobia, depression, and rants about my personal life http://www.supersoshychick.blogspot.com My dream log http://dreaminguponreality.blogspot.com/

11-05-2009, 02:36 PM	#17 (permalink)
shyvr6 Status: Makin Waves Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Somewhere on a map. Gender: Male Posts: 9,645	Normally, I would be mad at your family, but I guess it's just a part of your culture. If there is no hope in trying to make them understand, I would say to stand up for yourself and let them know that you don't care about their opinion, stop talking to them, or move away. __________________ Music

11-05-2009, 06:04 PM	#18 (permalink)
millenniumman75 Status: Super Moderator Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Dayton-Cincinnati, OH Gender: Male Age: 34 Posts: 38,668	That is just plain messed up. . __________________ millenniumman75 You are a success story waiting to happen! Live and let live VACUUMS more than a Hoover.... Live and HELP live is better!

11-05-2009, 06:14 PM	#19 (permalink)
sadfox Status: SAS Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: hamilton scotland Gender: Male Posts: 78	you may want to try a hooker it will give experience of sex and you wont be a virgin its not ideal but you will at least know that having sex is not all that great not really that big a deal i was 25 when i did and thought is that it i wasnt missing out on that much anyway