Do you have a lazy eye and does it bother you when you're trying to speak to someone - Social Anxiety Forum
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Old 12-24-2010, 08:11 PM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Default Do you have a lazy eye and does it bother you when you're trying to speak to someone

And you have to look them in the eye but you're afraid that they'll laugh at your lazy eye

I'm not crosse yed but one eye is bigger than the other. And they'll make some stupid remark. You know how most teenagers are.

I think that's a reason why I'm almost labeled weird to girls because I never look at them in the eye because I'm afraid they'll just scream at my lazy eye and go "Ewww" or something stupid like that. That's why I try and just always turn to the side when talking to a girl
Ex: <_< or
>_>

Facing in that direction so my eye doesn't appear too small
I don't know why.
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Old 12-25-2010, 12:34 AM   #2 (permalink)
 
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I have lazy eye but I wouldn't say it's that extreme. I've just noticed it in my pictures. One of my eyes is a little bigger than the other as well, which I hate. I've noticed celebrities and good-looking people have lazy eye and I don't think it makes a huge difference in their appearance. I don't think it's that big of a deal. When I've talked to people who have an obvious lazy eye, I just felt bad when I didn't realize they were talking to me. Other than that, I don't think anything of it. In my opinion, it's better to talk with your face forward to the other person and potentially scare them with your lazy eye (which I don't think is likely) rather than talk from the side because that might come off as you not wanting to talk.
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Old 02-18-2011, 08:59 AM   #3 (permalink)
 
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Gotta bump this. I'm surprised not a lot of people have lazy eyes on here :O
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Old 02-18-2011, 11:05 AM   #4 (permalink)
 
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my brother had a friend who had a lazy eye but we never said anything and it did not bother us when we used to hang out around 2009 , so most people don't care, like me.
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Old 02-18-2011, 11:30 AM   #5 (permalink)
 
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Anyone who would judge you negatively based on your having a lazy eye isn't worth your time.
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Old 02-18-2011, 11:33 AM   #6 (permalink)
 
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One of my much older cousins has an obvious lazy eye that doesn't focus on you when you're talking to him. I don't judge him or anything like that but it makes me uncomfortable because I'm never sure when he's talking or looking at me.
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Old 02-18-2011, 11:47 AM   #7 (permalink)
 
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I have a lazy left eye due to the surgery I went through as a baby to correct a birth defect I was born with. Not only is my sight weak in this eye, it looks noticeably out of place and is the source of a lot of my SA. I feel shame over it though it's not even my fault, but you know how people are. I hate pictures of myself so much for this and never have a front view shot, always profile just so that I don't cringe so terribly knowing others see what I see every day when I look at my face in the mirror.
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Old 02-18-2011, 04:38 PM   #8 (permalink)
 
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When you say one eye looks bigger than the other it sounds more like you have Ptosis than a lazy eye.. I have the same issue with my left eye. I didn't even notice it until my mother began to point it out occasionally. Now It's just another body part I hate that makes me self-conscious. I rarely look directly at anyone anyways because I hate the way I look and don't like people looking at me (hah, that sounds kind of crazy..) Making eye-contact or looking anyone in the face makes me really nervous & uncomfortable.

At first I tried to convince myself that maybe other people wouldn't notice or care but then I worked with this guy who had a lazy eye. I really didn't like looking at him because all I could focus on was his eye and it really bugged me. Maybe because it reminded me of myself.. I don't know. So now I worry everyone has that same reaction when they look at me. Like, "Omg! Your eye looks so stupid!" lol -_-;
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Old 02-18-2011, 05:50 PM   #9 (permalink)
 
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I have had a lazy eye since i was a kid and it always ruins photos unless i photoshop and edit and change the color and lighting of a pic because in school photos and childhood pics it was so visible that kids and adults would always comment on it.
another reason i was probably called "stoner girl" in high school because of the lazy eye
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Old 02-18-2011, 06:00 PM   #10 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Arisa1536 View Post
I have had a lazy eye since i was a kid and it always ruins photos unless i photoshop and edit and change the color and lighting of a pic because in school photos and childhood pics it was so visible that kids and adults would always comment on it.
another reason i was probably called "stoner girl" in high school because of the lazy eye
That's exactly what I have to do...lol The comments never help either...I hate when people are so obviously stuck on this flaw on my face. I feel like it's all I am sometimes with how bothered others come across by it, let alone my own insecurity.
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Old 11-09-2013, 10:28 AM   #11 (permalink)
 
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Default Yes

I do have a bad lazy eye and it does bug me I try not to look at people when i talk to them and i wish i knew an android app to fix lazy eye in pictures cuz i don't have money for photoshop
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Old 01-19-2014, 12:04 PM   #12 (permalink)
 
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Default Definitely Been There...

I have had a lazy eye since early childhood, and in my opinion it was the most noticeable type of flaw in the world. My eyes have always turned inward, alternating which eye is straight, and which is "lazy." Being a child in public school, it never went unnoticed. The comments received ranged from the obvious "cross-eyed" remarks designed to hurt me, to the somehow more painful yet innocent questions from younger children ("Why does your eye do that?") Add these factors to an adult family member who thrived on constantly reminding us of our most vulnerable flaws ("Your eyes cross when you lie..."), and you have a girl who is incapable of believing that she could be pretty.

Most of my life, I wasn't able to trust someone when they claimed to not notice my eyes. No matter how sincere they were, whether friend or boyfriend, I just assumed they cared about me too much to be truly honest. No matter how many times a guy was attracted to me, in my mind it was always because of my body, or because they had lowered their standards to be with me. I let myself believe that I deserved so little; that I would be lucky to be with anyone who would have me despite my perceived deformity. I ended up staying with someone who took pleasure in reminding me of how lucky I was to have anyone at all...using my insecurities to keep me in my place. I stayed I that abusive relationship far too long.

What changed things for me was getting out of that relationship. At some point, I realized - with help and support and constant reminders from friends and family - that he was also flawed and insecure. That EVERYONE has something that makes them feel not good enough. That my inescapable "deformity" only seemed worse to me because I was living with it, and letting it control my decisions. It was after I finally decided to end that relationship that I found a group of friends who changed everything.

These people looked me in the eye. They never asked me what happened to my eye. They never associated me with this one thing about me that seemed like my only signifying characteristic. They accepted me, no questions, no awkward kindnesses. And in that group I found my best friend and partner. In that group, I was able to look at myself from a new vantage point, and see myself as others had always seen me. My eye wasn't my identity; it was only a piece of who I was as a whole. It actually contributed to who I was, making me more approachable, as I was willing to accept almost everyone as they were.

It took time, but I am finally at a point where I wouldn't want to look any other way. I'm finally able to look at pictures of myself and not see THE EYE first. I look back at old pictures of myself and see what I was missing. All because I finally had enough. All because I decided not to allow how someone else saw me dictate my quality of life.

Hang in there. Listen to your friends and family. They are able to see something that you aren't. Find something that makes you completely comfortable with yourself - a group of people, a job, artistic expression - and spend your time there. And most of all. Do not settle for something or someone that makes you feel "less than." If they can't look you in the eye, that is their issue, not yours.

Also, find someone you admire that you didn't realize had a lazy eye - did you know that Cameron Diaz has one? How about Russell Crowe?

I'm not wise or maybe even smart. I took a really hard road to get here, after all, but I got here. I still worry about it sometimes, but not every day. Not every time I look in the mirror or have to talk to someone new. I can explain it to kids now without crying. I can even joke about it sometimes. It's not gone, but I no longer despise my face. =o)
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Old 01-19-2014, 12:21 PM   #13 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Darkness View Post
And you have to look them in the eye but you're afraid that they'll laugh at your lazy eye

I'm not crosse yed but one eye is bigger than the other. And they'll make some stupid remark. You know how most teenagers are.

I think that's a reason why I'm almost labeled weird to girls because I never look at them in the eye because I'm afraid they'll just scream at my lazy eye and go "Ewww" or something stupid like that. That's why I try and just always turn to the side when talking to a girl
Ex: <_< or
>_>

Facing in that direction so my eye doesn't appear too small
I don't know why.
Dude, I suspect someone commenting on it is the best thing that could happen, like seriously. If they find it weird and don't say anything you can't do anything about it, but if someone comments on it you get to look all confident saying "yeah, it sucks, I've always had this eye blah blah blah" and it sort of becomes normal because it's been acknowledged. What people reject is lack of confidence, not some mild physical defect. Anyway most people won't say anything because it's not a big deal.
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