do you hate your siblings? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-08-2009, 05:48 PM Thread Starter
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do you hate your siblings?

i hate them so much. i hate sibling arrangements when there are 3 sibligns of the same sex. I'm the oldest of all of us, so my 2 younger sisters really have nothing better to do than to gang up on me and make fun of me ALL the time. It's really condescending, and I've grown up having to take the brunt of it. I hate the fact that I have 2 immature brats. Maybe it's a common pattern that appears, but is it always the case that the younger 2 siblings tend to gang up on the older one? It seems that way. Family dynamics? Ugh, whatever.

I am sick of them making remarks at me about the clothes I wear, what I eat, etc. "why don't you move out of the house if you hate it so much", "that shirt is ugly on you", "you walk funny", blah blah blah. Like grow up you a holes. they are 21 and 19 by the way, and i'm 23. They've been like this since they were teenagers. but you'd expect them to AT THIS POINT get over this crap and stop picking on others for stupid reasons. I have resorted to violence numerous times out of frustration, but they don't stop. One day, out of frustration, I told one of them I was going to commit suicide. I'm not depressed in any way or have any suicidal thoughts, but after that statement, they have been ignoring me more frequently. Well, is this what it takes to be taken seriously around here? A suicide threat???

I don't even talk to my siblings anymore. We have nothing in common anyway. Even when we're in the same room we don't say a word to each other. Sometimes I wonder whether I'm overreacting, or whether they are truly annoying ******es and I have a right to be upset. Who knows.
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post #2 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-08-2009, 10:57 PM
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Wow Im so sorry your siblings treat you that way. It cant help your anxiety. But know that people grow up. Maybe in the future, you can all get along?

I guess Im lucky to have never had any conflict with my siblings. We get along. I am 6 years older than my sister and shes the complete opposite of me. Outgoing, extroverted, popular type. I guess she balances me out when Im with her. We have some good conversations. We are so different yet so alike in some ways. We both like to talk about the same stuff. Just she brings it out of me.
My brother is 8 years younger. Hes the shy type but has alot of friends and is an overachiever. We dont have conversations, because well we both dont talk much. But we've never had any conflict/fights even though we dont talk much.
I love my siblings. I guess a part of me wants us to always get along because both my parents come from large familys, and they never talk or see their own siblings (my aunts and uncles). Its kinda sad.

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post #3 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-08-2009, 11:10 PM
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nope i don't hate my siblings

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post #4 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-08-2009, 11:14 PM
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Nope, mine are quite a bit younger than me but I could imagine it being terrible from what you've described. I used to hate my younger brother for no reason, and then I realized that I hated him because he was exactly like me. He has some of the same problems I do and I feel incredibly responsible for not being nicer to him or setting any kind of example. I try to be nice to him as much as I can now.

Our personality's defenitely don't mesh though.
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post #5 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-08-2009, 11:16 PM
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Only child here. Sibling relationships confuse the heck out of me, I don't understand them at all. It must be frustrating when they don't exactly work out ideally.

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post #6 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-08-2009, 11:22 PM
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Yes, but I can only seek vengeance on one of them as the other one is dead.

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post #7 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-08-2009, 11:30 PM
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Sounds similar to my situation with my sister. We've always bullied and made fun of eachother growing up and still do (not nearly as much). I still am afraid of what my sister, above anyone, thinks of my clothes, what I do, who I hang out with. My sister doesn't really like to do anything with me or even talk to me, because she's too busy clinging onto her failed (imo) relationship with her boyfriend, as opposed to cultivating one with me. Sometimes I really feel like it's an opportunity wasted. I HAVE a sister, but our relationship is nothing like what other people have with their siblings. I could say the same for my mom too.
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post #8 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-08-2009, 11:53 PM
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I don't hate them, but I also hardly ever interact with them.
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post #9 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-09-2009, 12:21 PM
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Nope. My sister is awesome.
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post #10 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-09-2009, 02:30 PM
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not really, we just haven't talked in a long time and we live in the same household

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post #11 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-10-2009, 02:22 AM
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Nope. My brother is my favourite person that I've ever known. Too bad he's moved away and I hardly see him. He's only two years older but has achieved so much more than me. Despite this,I'll never hate him.
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post #12 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-10-2009, 04:47 AM
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I don't hate my siblings, but they hate me. My theory is that they think the reason my parents didn't love them is because I was hogging up all the love. Truth is that my parents were incapable of love.

I also think that my sister is a coward and incapable of standing up to my father. So she just takes everything out on me. If she's mad at dad I'm the one who gets yelled at. My brother is too far gone for any analyzing. I honestly wish all my friends could meet my siblings so they would know that, as screwed up as I am, I managed to be this normal in a family that turned my siblings so much more insane.
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post #13 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-11-2009, 05:41 AM
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Siblings are like that sometimes but have they stopped now? I agree you shouldn't have had to go so far to get them to stop. I'm lucky in that I have a lot in common with my younger brother, and most of the time we're practically friends, although we do annoy each other ocassionally. He's one of the few people I feel completly comfortable around.
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post #14 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-11-2009, 09:34 AM
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I'm pretty close with my brother, when he's not being an *** because something went bad at work or with his girlfriend. And i get along well with my sister also. If hell breaks loose for one of us, the others will be there to lend a hand or a roof or anything.

We don't hang out often because they are both pretty busy and have social lives.
I'm the only one who is a lonely loser.

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post #15 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-12-2009, 11:28 AM
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I don't hate them, but haven't spoken to or seen my older brothers in 18 months. They have always treated me like a child so it got to the point where I couldn't be around them any longer. I love them and would love to see them (if they'd treat me like an adult, and with respect) but I know they'll be no different from how they've always been, so its easier to not have any contact with them.
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post #16 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-12-2009, 11:38 AM
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Nope. My brother is my favorite person. Step siblings are a different story though.
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post #17 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-12-2009, 01:56 PM
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I have three older brothers, the two oldest are nice to me, but the third one is, I think, really mean to me and I'm not really sure why either. At least, he doesn't say in words exactly how he thinks of me, for good or for bad. He doesn't communicate, he just says it in his actions which aren't that nice either. He basically berates me most of the time, or probably all of the time, by saying, he has a job, he has friends, he's in school and asking me what do I have?? And I'm all like, so what? You're trying to make me be a better person and more productive by making me feel bad about myself?? Like that is going to work. I just have no patience for that kind of thing especially when someone does that to you constantly, and thinks they're a lot better than you just because they don't struggle as much with something like depression and anxiety. Yeah, like he's had to deal with that **** since middle school, and all of a sudden he think someone's making this choice to be socially anxious overnight. As you can see I have a lot of pent up anger over this thing when I thought siblings were supposed there for you in tough times rather than say they're better than you at everything. Oh yeah, we used to be close but now we fight a lot and he claims that the bulk of the blame is on me since I don't have a job and I don't talk.
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post #18 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-12-2009, 02:25 PM
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Hate is a terribly strong word. I don't hate anybody. I don't relate well to my siblings, and we're not a very close-knit crew now that we're grown. I envy siblings that stay close into adulthood, and wish we had that, but have accepted that we don't and we won't.
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post #19 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-12-2009, 07:24 PM
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Yeah, I do. My sister makes fun of me and says comments like "that shirt is so ugly on you", etc. She is so judgemental and hurtful. Since she's like this, I actually stopped being around her. I'm not taking abuse even it's from my sister. She's very pretty, wears all the nice clothes, but is really disrespectful to my parents. The way that she talks to them floors me.

Me and my other sister rarely see eachother and the last time, I did see her she called me a loser. Lovely! My older sister whenever she sees me yells at me a lot. I'm not taking that from them.

Well at least I'm not in stuck in relationships that I'm totally unhappy in. If I were my sister, I would have said good riddance to her loser boyfriend, oh 15 years ago when they first met. He cheats and lies constantly. They don't even get along.
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post #20 of 57 (permalink) Old 05-12-2009, 08:40 PM
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Trust me, nearly all of that crap goes away with age and having your own space (ie, not living at home anymore!)

I 'hated' my brother when I had to live with him, but once I grew up and went away to Australia for a year, when I came home he had grown up too and since then we have gotten along VERY well and we have a lot of fun together.

Granted, I am sure some people have siblings that are just jerks, but in general, when you and they mature, things improve so much that you question how things could possibly be so different!


"I don't wanna be lonely, I just wanna be alone..."
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