Do some people just get on your nerves for unintentionally, with no good reason? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 12 (permalink) Old 04-06-2011, 01:17 AM Thread Starter
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Do some people just get on your nerves for unintentionally, with no good reason?

Like they are not intentionally trying to piss you off yet for some reason, you find them irritating.

I have a roommate, cool dude and all but some times he just gets on my nerve, even when he doesn't do anything wrong like ask me where I went or what did I do today. Perhaps it is his tone of voice, or the fact that he speaks as if he is always right or something =\
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post #2 of 12 (permalink) Old 04-06-2011, 04:59 AM
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Speaking personally, I blocked out a lot of people I found annoying. People I thought were too stupid, too proud, too violent, too lazy, too exclusive, too immoral, etc... If you asked me, most people ended up being excessive somehow. Took some time to admit this, but it eventually taught me something: it wasn't them, it was me.

Maybe this is going to be counterintuitive: There probably is no reason why you get irritated anymore, maybe there was once, but you've just learned to associate negative feelings and motivations with a certain person. They probably haven't done anything, and you react to them negatively out of habit more than much else. It spoils relationships and it's a drain on your energy. So maybe get out and take a walk, a deep breath, or remind yourself how cool the person is, or go find someone else to hang out with for an hour or so to distract yourself.

Some folks I know still try to make it out like it really is an irritating person, but their reasons are such bull and I wonder if they know it deep down. It's just a person, nothing more. How you deal with it from there is up to you.
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post #3 of 12 (permalink) Old 04-06-2011, 05:46 AM
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Most of the people I have found irritating were very nice people but would constantly bother me when I wanted to be left alone. They just didn't know when to go away. I think I've only lashed out a few times. But I'm still sorry that I did...
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post #4 of 12 (permalink) Old 04-06-2011, 05:48 AM
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I experienced it during lunch today with my friend. Just the tone of voice at one point made me slap myself in the head from the pain. I couldn't wait to be alone again and smiled and reciprocated through gritted teeth.
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post #5 of 12 (permalink) Old 04-06-2011, 12:03 PM
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I think that it is something like transference, in as much as, like cflage said, we place our own negative feelings onto others so as to get them out of our bodies. In time, our negative feelings toward these people become habit.

I also am sometimes annoyed by every damn thing my roommate does, even though he is a very cool guy (other than never leaving me alone, but I guess this is good for my SA : )

Learn from defeat. Learn how to win. If you really want it, you feed everything to your fire. - Kobe Bryant
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post #6 of 12 (permalink) Old 04-06-2011, 01:50 PM
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My mum. Sometimes she gets into these lazy moods and talks too much, and I have to leave the room because I feel like I'm going to spontaneously combust from irritation.
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post #7 of 12 (permalink) Old 04-06-2011, 01:57 PM
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This one girl at school who has the most smug look on her face. Worst thing is shes attractive but the smugness on her face and the arrogance in her walk ruins it.
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post #8 of 12 (permalink) Old 04-06-2011, 03:18 PM
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Yeh this guy at work really pisses me off, he just looks so arrogant and always rushing around and slamming things like his job is the most important, he puts me in a bad mood just thinking about him

She loves him more than he will ever know
He loves her more than he will ever show - Swap Meet
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post #9 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-02-2013, 08:15 PM
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I have a teacher who's body language voice and facial expressions just bug the crap out of me. She is kind of the lunch room police so she goes over to your table sometimes and makes sure everything is appropriate, but the thing I find the worst is when she joins in on the conversation. And sadly as time goes by less and less people agree with me when I say she's annoying. Makes me feel awful for not liking her like everyone else does.

Heck when someone compliments her I want to explode from irritation. When I explain this to people they just say to me I'm being a teenager which is probably true but man am I tired of being irritated.
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post #10 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-02-2013, 08:48 PM
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Originally Posted by ChoirBoy View Post
Do some people just get on your nerves for unintentionally, with no good reason?
No, because I don't associate with people very often in real life.
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post #11 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-02-2013, 09:00 PM
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Yes, a lot of people piss me off or annoy me for no good reason. Like, no one else will be irritated by certain people except me. That's the most annoying thing, worse than dealing with someone that most people don't like.
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post #12 of 12 (permalink) Old 01-02-2013, 09:02 PM
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I get this way a lot lately. My parents are the biggest culprit. Most of the time I can't even stand my mother's voice, and just listening to anything she says slowly infuriates me. I've had friends along the same vein. Usually these sort of feelings stem from some sort of resentment, or having been wronged in some way by said person in a way where I can't confront them or deal with it openly, so I just get agitated and go into passive-aggressive mode. Or another example is a friend I have on Facebook, who has the things I want, like a good family, caring parents, a good husband (whom I'm good friends with and always had a bit of a crush on), semi-fame (she's a well-known cosplayer with an amazing body and a huge following of fans who fawn over her), and just a generally good life-- but she's always depressed and posting pity-parties on her Facebook. And even though I know that even people with what I consider 'everything' can still be unhappy for a multitude of legitimate reasons, I still get so pissed off when listening to her complain.

"We're all going to die. All of us. What a circus!
That alone should make us love each other, but it doesn't.
We are terrorized and flattened by trivialities.
We are eaten up by nothing."
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Well, it feels pretty soft to me.
And if it takes sh*t to make bliss, well I feel
Pretty blissfully!"
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