As a man - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 3 (permalink) Old 08-22-2007, 11:46 AM Thread Starter
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As a man

it's probably not normal to seek out old friends or whatever for emotional support is it? I think this is the reason for my constant rejection. I come across as quite emotional perhaps and that's a very negative trait for a man to have. I used to present myself as very stoic I think (I was still quiet/shy and didn't think very highly of myself) but I didn't come across as awkward emotional and neurotic until later on. I think thats my problem now. I've got to somehow fake stoicism so I can be more desirable to people, as a man. I just really feel like I need some emotional personal support though and can't seem to find it at all (cept here of course)

I also shouldn't feel so emotional about the rejection either. Like say perhaps a girl I was very close friends with and I'd once had sexual experience with (very long time ago) doesn't respond to my messages on myspace (yet accepts my friend request for whatever reason) she probably thinks I'm just looking for action or something, rather than actually valuing the friendship I once had with her (we were close friends, not in a BF/GF kind of way, we just ended up doing stuff together once) Probably doesn't realize I want to speak to her like a friend

I don't know though. Maybe I just do have a personality disorder or something and it's impossible for anyone to really like me. It seems as though most people never valued the time they spent with me (old friends have absolutely no interest in talking to me it seems)
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post #2 of 3 (permalink) Old 08-22-2007, 12:50 PM
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Re: As a man

I know the feeling of contacting people and then maybe not getting what you had hoped for. I don't think it's you, it happens all the time. Some people I know have busy social lives but no-one to really talk to.

Have you tried counselling or therapy? It helped me a lot when I had no-one for support.

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post #3 of 3 (permalink) Old 08-22-2007, 02:41 PM Thread Starter
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Re: As a man

I saw a psychologist for a while recently but I felt he wasn't helping me out very much. I felt as though, even though he had the gift of embellishing my thoughts and experiences in an articulate way (from a perspective I might not have seen them from) that he really wasn't helping me in any way, so I stopped seeing him. I'm kind of a weirdo as well and mentioned that I enjoy/follow existentialism somewhat to him and he didn't seem to know what that was all about (rather he thought he did and tried to make it seem as though I wasn't as familiar with it as him) so I'd lost respect for him. He'd also constantly look over at his clock to see when time was running out, talk down to me, go off on tangents that didn't really relate to what I'd said etc. In the end his advice amounted to what a regular person could tell me.
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