Are you attracted to sad people? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 02:18 PM Thread Starter
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Are you attracted to sad people?

This is something I've been thinking about lately. Normal 'happy' people are just seem so mundane to me. There's something about people who emit that lone wolf personality type that is kinda sexy. I can't really put my finger on it, but it's like people who don't go around putting on a fake personality seem sexier, because they're not trying to conform... or something. It seems like all the pepppy girls are the ones that like me too, which is not what I'm after.

These type of people are the loner/cool type, kind of like James Dean. He was shy in real life, and he was the coolest dude ever. It was his personality that made him that way too. Don't really know what I'm getting at here, but I think most of you are great!

Josh Hartnett
Brad Pitt
James Franco
Ryan Gosling
Robbert Pattinson
Johnny Depp

The list goes on of people who are shy and emit a cool personality. Screw the peppy types, SA does suck,but I think we're cooler overall.

I might have been born at night, but it wasn't last night.. don't try it suckA!
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post #2 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 02:24 PM
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I think sad/depressed people are generally more intelligent so that's a plus.
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post #3 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 02:34 PM
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Uhhh can't really say I feel the same. But I see where you're coming from.
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post #4 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 03:56 PM
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I feel uncomfortable around loud happy people, but I don't feel attracted to sad people. I prefer someone who is shy and is not smiling all the time.

Amar es Liberar
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post #5 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 04:27 PM
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I like sad people, too. Seems like we connect more than really happy people. Most of the friends I've had online have been sad/depressed. I do feel a tad more attracted to them, I guess. Not always necessarily attracted to them in a "more than friends" way, but more in a "I get you" way.
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post #6 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 04:34 PM
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I have fantasies sometimes about comforting a crying girl. I don't know why it's so appealing. Maybe the fact that I can do my manly job of saving a damsel in distress. Yeah, that's probably it. It's funny because if a girl actually cried in front of me, I'd probably either panic like crazy due to not knowing what to do, or just tap her awkwardly and say 'there there'.
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post #7 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 04:37 PM
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Yes, I definitely know what you mean! People who are quiet and non-chalant (yet who still have a sense of humor) usually seem very mysterious to me, in an intriguing way. People who are constantly laughing and talking tend to get on my nerves.

Demons run when a good man goes to war.
Night will fall and drown the sun when a good man goes to war.
Friendship dies and true love lies.
Night will fall and the dark will rise when a good man goes to war.
Demons run but count the cost; the battle's won but the child is lost.

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post #8 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 05:00 PM
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There's no particular rule for me. But I tend to find less bubbly, slightly sad people easier to approach cos I don't feel they'll judge me. I smile a lot myself though. My facial responses are something like:
Happy
Feeling awkward
Heartbroken

Turning to poison while the bee-mouth sips...
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post #9 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 05:04 PM
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I agree, I think people who are the more loner type are cooler. Not so much depressed/sad, though. I would be more attracted to a guy sitting by himself somewhere minding his own business than the guy who is really personable and talking to everybody.
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post #10 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 05:07 PM
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Hmm, weird question to ask... I dunno really, not necessarily I guess, imo sadness is negativity and I don't like negativity. So not really, no.
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post #11 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 05:09 PM
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I like sullen personalities. Usually they're all married, though, with children. Explains the sadness.

"If you expect nothing from anybody, you're never disappointed." - Sylvia Plath
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post #12 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 05:10 PM
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Yes and No.

When you're miserable, you need to make someone even more miserable than yourself.
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post #13 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 05:11 PM
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Yes, very much so.
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post #14 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 05:16 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FitchForce View Post
This is something I've been thinking about lately. Normal 'happy' people are just seem so mundane to me. There's something about people who are sad and depressed that is kinda sexy. I can't really put my finger on it, but it's like people who don't go around putting on a fake personality seem sexier, because they're not trying to conform... or something. It seems like all the pepppy girls are the ones that like me too, which is not what I'm after.

These type of people are the loner/cool type, kind of like James Dean. He was shy in real life, and he was the coolest dude ever. It was his personality that made him that way too. Don't really know what I'm getting at here, but I think most of you are great!

Josh Hartnett
Brad Pitt
James Franco
Ryan Gosling
Robbert Pattinson
Johnny Depp

The list goes on of people who are shy and emit a cool personality. Screw the peppy types, SA does suck,but I think we're cooler overall.
I wouldn't consider those you have listed to be sad people.
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post #15 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 05:27 PM
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I tend to get along pretty well with sad people, though I wouldn't say it's a trait I'm attracted to. Most girls who show interest in me tend to be sad.
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post #16 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 06:25 PM
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When I was younger I equated sadness and depression with having some sort of depth or special insight. But, the more I got to know some of those people I realised it was more self-absorption and self-obsession they were displaying. And I include myself in that observation- negativity does nit make me interesting!
Happy and confident people can be as deep, intriguing and thoughtful as shy people, sad people, or other loners.
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post #17 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 06:55 PM
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Lol i don't understand the famous actors being linked to being "sad" people, but i like to be around people who are relatively mellow, not just downers,but just down to earth and not smiling all the time.

This too shall pass.
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post #18 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 06:56 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RockBottomRiser View Post
I wouldn't consider those you have listed to be sad people.

Lmao, not to mention all those people are ridiculously good looking, I think that's People magazines most beautiful people list. Shyness does not equal sad...what a joke!
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post #19 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 06:56 PM
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I get along with emotional people because we all seem to relate so it makes first time conversations a bit easier compared to someone who's bubbly and animated like crazy.
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post #20 of 49 (permalink) Old 09-23-2011, 07:17 PM
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I don't know if sad, but yes, I like quieter, more mysterious people more because I can often relate more, don't feel looked down upon, and they seem more intelligent mostly.

"This feeling always used to pass.
But seems like it's every day. Seems like it's every night now..."
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