MAN OH MAN! that is my problem right now too! im totally obsessed with this one guy as well. it is like my whole life revolves around him! for example, when i wake up in the morning i have trouble finding out what to wear for the day just in case i might just happen to run into him.
im literally always thinking about him every second of everyday, and i want to know everything about him and what he is doing! and everything that he has said to me in the past, i analyze his words to see if they meant anything. i am aware of irrational thoughts as well, but i honestly do think there is something between us, its weird. he has hit on me a few times.
the trouble is, hes friends with my boyfried, and for that I FEEL REALLY HORRIBLE, very guilty FOR THINKING LIKE THIS,. ive had this crush for a looooooong time and i cant seem to get over it!! it really causes a lot of distress in my life. im even pushing my boyfriend away from me and being emotionally distant with him although i love him dearly. and another thing, because i have this anxiety, in one way i want to see this guy when i get the chance, but then in another way i dont want to unless i look good and feel confident because i become very anxious and nervous around him, and start acting so stupid that it embarasses me and makes me LITERALLY depressed, so ive chosen to AVOID him at times. when im by myself or with my own friends and hes in the same bar/restaurant/area but may be across the room (and were not talking one on one), im ok, i can function with my friends, but when i come around him, i really lose my breath and become very anxious and cant speak!
but yeah i can relate with "whiteclouds" when she noted how she was obsessed with some guy and wanted to follow him home. ive felt like doing that too, driving by his place to see if i can catch a glimpse of him, and wanting to call him private just to hear his voice (although i managed to stop myself from doing that which is good!) but then i stop and think to myself, this is weird, im being weird, i do feel like a stalker and i need to stop thinking like this! but its really hard!
is something wrong with me! i really feel there is!!
i really dont know what to do or how to get over him! I DONT EVEN KNOW IF I WANT TO?!?!?! i would love to be with this crush but im in a wonderful relationship as well. so im torn in two.
. in one way i want to get over this crush because its tormenting my life, but on the other hand its like im trying or wanting to hold onto this crush just in case something can happen in the near future!
i also dont feel confident in my looks, and thats whats bothering me too, because this crush can get any beautiful girl that i cannot compare too. i feel like an ugly duckling.
IM SO CONFUSED!! IM LOST! can anyone else relate!! HELP!!!!!