Social Anxiety Support

jfk1116 · 03-05-2009, 08:19 AM

I am getting a little better at it now but this is me. If something good happens for instance like a good therapy session or a complament etc, than I feel like something bad will follow shortly later. It makes it almost impossible to look to the future when I think this way. I have improved some though through therapy.

Black_Widow · 03-05-2009, 10:15 AM

Yup, I get the same thing. I really wish I didn't keep automatically reacting in that way though.

rachelynn · 03-05-2009, 11:49 AM

Yeah...I can think this a lot.

Freiheit · 03-05-2009, 04:54 PM

Yep this always happens to me just when something positive happens to get me in a good mood I already know something awful will happen soon and piss me off since that how the pattern seems to be going. It sucks.

imt · 03-05-2009, 05:08 PM

I always feel like this. I just try my best take the future as it comes and don't predict anything, since my nerves will go bizarre because of my vivid imagination.

VCL XI · 03-05-2009, 05:37 PM

For me it's not a feeling, but an inevitability.

rpcullen · 03-05-2009, 06:27 PM

I don't really have that problem. For me I have my good days and my bad days. However, any progress I might make on a good day seems to fade as I go back to my SA habits the next day.

Its not the fact that something negative will happen later- its the fact that nothing will happen and things will always remains the same - this is what scares me. I don't want to be in the endless cycle of one-step-forward one-step-back for the rest of my life.

It seems like at this rate I'll overcome my SA when I'm 75 or something. I would rather have negative stuff happening to me every day because I'm "out there" doing things I want to do, then always staying in my "comfort zone" and wondering what the outside world is like.

I'm working on it... its hard but I'm working on it.

Bredwh · 03-05-2009, 10:05 PM

This is something called the Gambler's Fallacy. It is "committed when a person assumes that a departure from what occurs on average or in the long term will be corrected in the short term. The form of the fallacy is as follows:

1. X has happened.
2. X departs from what is expected to occur on average or over the long term.
3. Therefore, X will come to an end soon."

Example:

"Jane and Bill are talking:

Jane: "I'll be able to buy that car I always wanted soon."
Bill: "Why, did you get a raise?"
Jane: "No. But you know how I've been playing the lottery all these years?"
Bill: "Yes, you buy a ticket for every drawing, without fail."
Jane: "And I've lost every time."
Bill: "So why do you think you will win this time?"
Jane: "Well, after all those losses I'm due for a win.""

millenniumman75 · 03-05-2009, 11:10 PM

This is part of SA - waiting for the next disaster to strike, part of the negative thinking and self-esteem.

refined_rascal · 03-08-2009, 11:45 AM

It's totally irrational to think this way - but yes I do it all the time.

jfk1116 · 03-09-2009, 11:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by refined_rascal

It's totally irrational to think this way - but yes I do it all the time.

Youre exactly right. It is totally irrational, but very hard to improve on, althogh I have made a little headway in the past year.

fallingdownonmyface · 06-05-2010, 07:37 PM

I don't feel like it. It always happens. Everytime something good happens something bad happens with me.

CrisRose · 06-06-2010, 10:51 AM

I don't feel like something bad will happen but if I am really excited or happy about something, I get sad shortly after for no reason. It's like I can't let myself feel happy for too long

Hello22 · 06-06-2010, 04:46 PM

Yep cos once something in my life is going great, another area goes belly-up

ktbare · 06-06-2010, 04:57 PM

I just feel that whenever something good happens or I'm feeling what I suppose is "happy" that it's all bound to come crashing down and turn to sh#t, or that it was never truly real in the first place.

Brewer · 06-06-2010, 05:32 PM

Just recently I've been feeling this way. Over the last 2 or 3 days when something good/bad happens, the opposite takes place after. It's like clockwork.

matty · 06-06-2010, 05:43 PM

I tend to think the other way. when something bad happens I think that something good will follow. Even if I have 3 or 4 bad things in a row then I just think my luck will change soon enough. Then I just enjoy the good times while they happen.

Dusky · 06-06-2010, 07:40 PM

Hmm...I think this feeling is limited to close relationships/friendships for me. Anything that involves having to depend on someone to do something or anyone else being involved in general in a casual-not-professional way. Everything else usually goes the way I would expect it to.

recluse1 · 06-10-2010, 09:39 PM

Sometimes when something good happens and I feel happy about it, I often remind myself not to rejoice too much because if something bad happens after, then the harder I will crash or my sadness will be more intense. So to "protect" myself, I remind myself not to celebrate too much. Sounds illogical to "normal" people but that's how I really feel.

Neptunus · 06-10-2010, 09:41 PM

Yes! I often feel as though I'm fated for crap to happen to me!

03-05-2009, 08:19 AM	#1 (permalink)
jfk1116 Status: Taking Action Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Ca Gender: Male Age: 32 Posts: 515	Does anybody else feel like if something good happens than something bad will happen I am getting a little better at it now but this is me. If something good happens for instance like a good therapy session or a complament etc, than I feel like something bad will follow shortly later. It makes it almost impossible to look to the future when I think this way. I have improved some though through therapy.

03-05-2009, 10:05 PM	#8 (permalink)
Bredwh Status: Single White He-male Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Delhi, NY, USA (in the Catskills) Gender: Male Age: 26 Posts: 811	This is something called the Gambler's Fallacy. It is "committed when a person assumes that a departure from what occurs on average or in the long term will be corrected in the short term. The form of the fallacy is as follows: 1. X has happened. 2. X departs from what is expected to occur on average or over the long term. 3. Therefore, X will come to an end soon." Example: "Jane and Bill are talking: Jane: "I'll be able to buy that car I always wanted soon." Bill: "Why, did you get a raise?" Jane: "No. But you know how I've been playing the lottery all these years?" Bill: "Yes, you buy a ticket for every drawing, without fail." Jane: "And I've lost every time." Bill: "So why do you think you will win this time?" Jane: "Well, after all those losses I'm due for a win."" __________________ my intro thread + history/description of my SA

03-05-2009, 11:10 PM	#9 (permalink)
millenniumman75 Status: Mentor Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Dayton, OH Gender: Male Age: 37 Posts: 91,722	This is part of SA - waiting for the next disaster to strike, part of the negative thinking and self-esteem. __________________ millenniumman75 You are a success story waiting to happen! Live and let live VACUUMS more than a Hoover.... Live and HELP live is better! TROLL ALERT STATUS: CHAT -> BERT FORUMS -> ERNIE (troll activity on the increase) WATCH WHAT YOU TYPE!

06-06-2010, 10:51 AM	#13 (permalink)
CrisRose Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Long Island, New York Gender: Female Posts: 122	I don't feel like something bad will happen but if I am really excited or happy about something, I get sad shortly after for no reason. It's like I can't let myself feel happy for too long __________________ See I'm trying to find my place But it might not be here where I feel safe We all learn to make mistakes

06-06-2010, 05:43 PM	#17 (permalink)
matty Status: Mentor Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Brisnyland. Gender: Male Age: 27 Posts: 3,796	I tend to think the other way. when something bad happens I think that something good will follow. Even if I have 3 or 4 bad things in a row then I just think my luck will change soon enough. Then I just enjoy the good times while they happen. __________________ --The past is only the future with the lights-- --I'm Beat but cant be Broken-- Under Construction

03-05-2009, 10:15 AM	#2 (permalink)
Black_Widow Status: SAS Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: South-East London, UK Gender: Female Age: 32 Posts: 1,264	Yup, I get the same thing. I really wish I didn't keep automatically reacting in that way though.

03-05-2009, 11:49 AM	#3 (permalink)
rachelynn Status: Daydreaming Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: USA Gender: Female Age: 24 Posts: 585	Yeah...I can think this a lot.

03-05-2009, 04:54 PM	#4 (permalink)
Freiheit Status: o_O Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: USA Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 4,956	Yep this always happens to me just when something positive happens to get me in a good mood I already know something awful will happen soon and piss me off since that how the pattern seems to be going. It sucks.

03-05-2009, 05:08 PM	#5 (permalink)
imt Status: User Requested Permanent Ban Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Fourth Plateau Posts: 879	I always feel like this. I just try my best take the future as it comes and don't predict anything, since my nerves will go bizarre because of my vivid imagination.

03-05-2009, 05:37 PM	#6 (permalink)
VCL XI Status: smash everything Join Date: Jan 2004 Gender: Male Posts: 1,937	For me it's not a feeling, but an inevitability.

03-05-2009, 06:27 PM	#7 (permalink)
rpcullen Status: SAS Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Canada Gender: Male Age: 26 Posts: 4	I don't really have that problem. For me I have my good days and my bad days. However, any progress I might make on a good day seems to fade as I go back to my SA habits the next day. Its not the fact that something negative will happen later- its the fact that nothing will happen and things will always remains the same - this is what scares me. I don't want to be in the endless cycle of one-step-forward one-step-back for the rest of my life. It seems like at this rate I'll overcome my SA when I'm 75 or something. I would rather have negative stuff happening to me every day because I'm "out there" doing things I want to do, then always staying in my "comfort zone" and wondering what the outside world is like. I'm working on it... its hard but I'm working on it.

03-08-2009, 11:45 AM	#10 (permalink)
refined_rascal Status: SAS Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: United Kingdom Gender: Male Age: 42 Posts: 1,947	It's totally irrational to think this way - but yes I do it all the time.

06-05-2010, 07:37 PM	#12 (permalink)
fallingdownonmyface Status: SAS Member Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Bay Area California Gender: Male Age: 27 Posts: 734	I don't feel like it. It always happens. Everytime something good happens something bad happens with me.

06-06-2010, 04:46 PM	#14 (permalink)
Hello22 Status: Permanently Manned! Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Republic of Ireland Gender: Female Age: 25 Posts: 2,846	Yep cos once something in my life is going great, another area goes belly-up

06-06-2010, 04:57 PM	#15 (permalink)
ktbare Status: Existence is purpose Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Australia Gender: Female Age: 29 Posts: 641	I just feel that whenever something good happens or I'm feeling what I suppose is "happy" that it's all bound to come crashing down and turn to sh#t, or that it was never truly real in the first place.

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06-06-2010, 05:32 PM	#16 (permalink)
Brewer Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Edmonton, Alberta Gender: Male Posts: 10	Just recently I've been feeling this way. Over the last 2 or 3 days when something good/bad happens, the opposite takes place after. It's like clockwork.

06-06-2010, 07:40 PM	#18 (permalink)
Dusky Status: New Character Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 62	Hmm...I think this feeling is limited to close relationships/friendships for me. Anything that involves having to depend on someone to do something or anyone else being involved in general in a casual-not-professional way. Everything else usually goes the way I would expect it to.

06-10-2010, 09:39 PM	#19 (permalink)
recluse1 Status: SAS Member Join Date: May 2010 Location: Toronto, Canada Gender: Male Posts: 5	Sometimes when something good happens and I feel happy about it, I often remind myself not to rejoice too much because if something bad happens after, then the harder I will crash or my sadness will be more intense. So to "protect" myself, I remind myself not to celebrate too much. Sounds illogical to "normal" people but that's how I really feel.

06-10-2010, 09:41 PM	#20 (permalink)
Neptunus Status: User Requested Permanent Ban Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Navigating a sea of emotions Gender: Female Posts: 19,632	Yes! I often feel as though I'm fated for crap to happen to me!