Social Anxiety Support

Monroee · 08-01-2011, 09:52 AM

Just wondering who here has Bipolar Disorder & how their mood currently is along with what medications they are on.

Just curious. I don't know any other Bipolars in real life. So - I'm kinda desperate to talk to others & relate to them.

I'm on Effexor 37.5 mg. They are trying to wean me off of it because it stimulated a manic episode in me along with stress. Also Abilify 15 mg to control my manic anger that I have ever since the first mania. & Lamictal 300 mg which is my main medication treatment.

I also have weekly therapy. & A monthly visit to my psychiatrist who also does an hour session of therapy with me. I consider myself lucky in that regard as most psychiatrists do not do therapy as well. So - I technically have two therapists.

I'm a rapid-cycling Bipolar due to the Kindling Effect.

Anyone care to share their state right now?

(I feel like there are numerous Bipolar threads that just go dead. I want this one to remain active, pleaseeeee.)

Rest or Real? · 08-01-2011, 04:34 PM

I will attest. I am attempting to maintain stasis here at the moment. Bipolar mood swings are eating me alive lately, but the last couple of days have been better. Not such wild, drawn out fluctuations. Currently I am on the "up" side of the pole, and I won't be surprised if that lasts a while until I hover down most ruthlessly.

Medication isn't a tool at my disposal currently, but I was last on Seroquel 600mg, Lithium 900mg and Xanax 1mg as needed. Therapy was twice a month, which is nothing. I hope to start up every week once I'm done and settled with moving.

Thankfully I haven't hit one of my incredible highs or lows since being unmedicated (I have swung really fiercely, just no suicide attempts or blatant tears from reality), but the fear of such is always nagging at me. Really don't want to have to break, but I do need to wait for help. Just a few more weeks. Good thread idea by the way, I'm just none too sure of the amount of manic depressives around here.

Monroee · 08-02-2011, 01:40 PM

Thanks for replying, dear. You've been having a REALLY rough time lately. As you've been sharing with me. I really hope you start feel better soon, or can at least see a doctor/therapist. When is your next therapist appointment?

Are we the only two people with Bipolar Disorder? Not even anyone with Cyclothymia??

Fromheretoeternity · 08-02-2011, 01:51 PM

I have Bipolar Disorder and I'm getting treated for it with 300 mg of Quetiapine which helps my hallucinations and stables my moods. My moods were like a rollercoaster and when I first started taking my medication and when I was discharged from hospital I tried to commit suicide and continued cutting myself but now I see the benefits of my medication. Yes, my low self-esteem isn't the best but hopefully later in time it'll develop.

Monroee · 08-02-2011, 02:44 PM

Nice to see another Bipolar here, FromHeretoEternity.

Wow - you are really young to be diagnosed & medicated for Bipolar Disorder. It shocks me & I feel horrible that teenagers can be afflicted with it so early & have to destroy the best years of their life. I know depression destroyed mine. I didn't start experiencing hypomania until around 17-18. Then mania at 19-20.

On the other hand, its good that you're getting treatment right now, to prevent the kindling effect. Where the Bipolar gets worse over time & becomes treatment-resistant. I was put on the wrong medications & now I'm a rapid-cycler, also because it went untreated when it started. I only got properly diagnosed about a month ago when I was hospitalized for mania. That's when doctors finally saw it. I was self-diagnosed for a bit though once my hypomania started to get more severe.

I want to lower my medication however because of severe everyday headaches & feeling extremely blunted in emotions & personality.

Fromheretoeternity · 08-02-2011, 02:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EarlGreyDregs

Nice to see another Bipolar here, FromHeretoEternity.

Wow - you are really young to be diagnosed & medicated for Bipolar Disorder. It shocks me & I feel horrible that teenagers can be afflicted with it so early & have to destroy the best years of their life. I know depression destroyed mine. I didn't start experiencing hypomania until around 17-18. Then mania at 19-20.

On the other hand, its good that you're getting treatment right now, to prevent the kindling effect. Where the Bipolar gets worse over time & becomes treatment-resistant. I was put on the wrong medications & now I'm a rapid-cycler, also because it went untreated when it started. I only got properly diagnosed about a month ago when I was hospitalized for mania. That's when doctors finally saw it. I was self-diagnosed for a bit though once my hypomania started to get more severe.

I want to lower my medication however because of severe everyday headaches & feeling extremely blunted in emotions & personality.

They got mine at the early signs of it, the psychiatrist said I may have early signs of Bipolar Disorder then I got hospitalized and got put on medication and got told I was getting treated for Bipolar Disorder. I hope that one day, you'll find a medication that benefits like mine does. At first I was wondering how my medication would help my moods because it was an anti-psychotic and not an anti-depressant but the psychiatrist said that an anti-depressant would make my hallucinations worse.

Monroee · 08-02-2011, 03:03 PM

Thanks, I hope I find the right combination as well. Lamictal worked great when it was at 200 mg. But then the mania & anger came out of literally nowhere, so they upped it along with the anti-psychotic. So, we are with really good drugs, just not sure of the correct dosages yet.

Yeah, anti-depressants are well-known for making Bipolar Disorder worse. I took Effexor (an anti-depressant) & I ended up with my largest & longest mania.

Moselle · 08-02-2011, 03:07 PM

I have never been professionally diagnosed as bipolar, but I've shown enough signs of it that I believe I probably have it. I mentioned it to my boyfriend ages ago to get his opinion since he's taken at least 3 years of psychology, but he called me a hypochondriac. Then just recently he told me he thinks I might be bipolar. I've learned to hide when it happens because I didn't want others to think I was crazy. Usually if I'm upset and then suddenly fine I'll sit quietly for some time as though I'm still unhappy or just feeling neutral instead of just acting happy right away. It's much harder to hide going from happy to upset though. I can be in a great mood and then suddenly sadness or anger slaps me in the face.

I realize I don't have a severe case of bipolar disorder, but I also feel like it's just budding. Hopefully it won't ever get too severe.

It's rough knowing how to cope with it. Most people don't understand it very well. I always feel like people think bipolar means that you don't have enough self control to act right or that you take things too seriously or are just overly dramatic. :/ People just aren't educated on topics like these. I took a semester each of psychology and sociology so I have to remind myself that I have a semester more of understanding than most people I'll meet. (Not trying to sound cocky. A lot of high schools don't offer those courses and only a limited number of students can actually take them.)

Fromheretoeternity · 08-02-2011, 03:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EarlGreyDregs

Thanks, I hope I find the right combination as well. Lamictal worked great when it was at 200 mg. But then the mania & anger came out of literally nowhere, so they upped it along with the anti-psychotic. So, we are with really good drugs, just not sure of the correct dosages yet.

Yeah, anti-depressants are well-known for making Bipolar Disorder worse. I took Effexor (an anti-depressant) & I ended up with my largest & longest mania.

I'm on 300 mg and my psychiatrist was seeing about putting me up to 400 mg but she's going to wait. I wasn't sure at first if anti-depressants would help but I got told they'd just make things worse.

Monroee · 08-02-2011, 03:12 PM

Is it possible that you could make an appointment with a doctor? That might be beneficial for you, Moselle.

I totally agree about the misconceptions about Bipolar Disorder & the ignorance about it. I'm a Psychology of Abnormal Behaviour Major in college, so I'm more aware of psychological disorders than mostly everyone around me. I got interested in once I started experiencing flipping depressions & I wanted to know what was wrong with me. After that - I wanted to be a therapist.

Anyways - my father is the worst however. When I told him he said, "all women are Bipolar". Wow... thanks for trivializing, Dad.

Edit: I also thought I was just a mild case of Bipolar, but it got incredibly worse over the past year. It usually gets worse if left untreated. It usually comes out in the early twenties.

Fromheretoeternity · 08-02-2011, 03:16 PM

My dad didn't think I had Bipolar, he thought it was just me being a teenager then when I saw a psychiatrist. He thought I was just a little bit depressed. He didn't think I had it because he said to the psychiatrist, " I don't think she has Bipolar because my uncle has it and he saw aliens."

Monroee · 08-02-2011, 03:18 PM

That's kind of ironic because if your/his uncle had it, than that makes it even more likely that you have it, since its genetic. Hah.

Also - it takes quite a few years before it starts coming out full-blown. Like I mentioned. It only started becoming life-threatening when I turned 19-20.

Fromheretoeternity · 08-02-2011, 03:22 PM

His uncle isn't genetically part of the family as I've been told. I don't think my dad understood that it takes quite a few years for it to come out full-blown.

jokatemcd · 08-02-2011, 06:56 PM

hi - i was reading up on the thread, and i wanted to say hello to my fellow bi-polars

i've been living with it for 18 years now and still havent gotten it fully under control. I was 14 when things started going crazy for me and beyond just depression... ive been on pretty much every med you can think of to try at all different levels... im on an interesting med cocktail at the moment that seems to be helping.
i, too, would love to have this thread continue, as i also do not know many people with bipolar who are willing to really talk about it, especially as adults...
i just downloaded the android app for this site, too, so i am hoping to keep in close contact! lol

im off now to fill out my profile so hopefully by the time anyone reads this there will be some info about me to find out, too.

thanks - Jo

Monroee · 08-03-2011, 06:04 AM

Welcome to SAS, jokatemcd.

Glad to see you found this thread. It's amazing how many people here keep showing up & saying they have this disorder. I'd love to hear more about your experience with it when you get the time.

Monroee · 08-03-2011, 07:15 AM

I now understand why my doctor wanted to sedate me so.. I'm crying like a f-king baby right now & am borderline suicidal. (NOT that I have a plan, don't take this the wrong way) but I feel very much depressive right now. No need to give me advice, that's what PsychForums is for.

Rest or Real? · 08-03-2011, 09:26 AM

You'll be all good, EGD, I just know it.

To anyone with bipolar disorder: Do you find obsessing to be a prominent force, be it with a person, a hobby, anything? I know it isn't uncommon to choose something and be overtly passionate about for a period of time before becoming burn out. Just wondering, I may have a form of OCD. For example, I listen to the same song over and over daily, and have been for a couple months now, haha. The song changes, and I listen to other music interspersed between the constant replaying of the song I am obsessed with, but I just find it a little odd that it can hamper my mood if I don't hear the song at least a few times. LOL I sound ridiculous, hooray MI.

Monroee · 08-03-2011, 10:18 AM

I think obsessing is common in mania. I know you've been quite manic for awhile, Tenebrous.

& Thanks for the reassurance.

guppy88 · 08-04-2011, 09:17 PM

They say I'm bipolar, but I doubt I have it. They put me on lithium for a long while, but I stopped because I knew I wasn't bipolar, and I'm fine now.

I'm trying to get into the air force, and i'm hoping a few year in the fire department and getting my EMT-P will change their mind, but I'm digressing.

If you're bipolar it's important to know that your emotions will change when you're feeling bad.

ladyloveless · 08-05-2011, 09:25 AM

They told me I was bipolar and I went through a bit of counseling but my mum basically refused to believe that anything was wrong with me. She's just sort of pretended it didn't exist and I never really got any sort of help.

I just turned 18 a few months ago. I don't have a car or a job or anything. I don't know what to do; I know that I need help.

Right now I'm at that sort of mellow in between low and high, which I know wont last much longer. I can feel myself slipping into deep depression and I don't know what to do.

08-01-2011, 09:52 AM	#1 (permalink)
Monroee Status: Circus Freak Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: USA. Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 3,059	Bipolar Disorder Just wondering who here has Bipolar Disorder & how their mood currently is along with what medications they are on. Just curious. I don't know any other Bipolars in real life. So - I'm kinda desperate to talk to others & relate to them. I'm on Effexor 37.5 mg. They are trying to wean me off of it because it stimulated a manic episode in me along with stress. Also Abilify 15 mg to control my manic anger that I have ever since the first mania. & Lamictal 300 mg which is my main medication treatment. I also have weekly therapy. & A monthly visit to my psychiatrist who also does an hour session of therapy with me. I consider myself lucky in that regard as most psychiatrists do not do therapy as well. So - I technically have two therapists. I'm a rapid-cycling Bipolar due to the Kindling Effect. Anyone care to share their state right now? (I feel like there are numerous Bipolar threads that just go dead. I want this one to remain active, pleaseeeee.) __________________ (((>.<)))

08-01-2011, 04:34 PM	#2 (permalink)
Rest or Real? Status: Nunca; nadie Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: USA Gender: Male Age: 23 Posts: 1,191	I will attest. I am attempting to maintain stasis here at the moment. Bipolar mood swings are eating me alive lately, but the last couple of days have been better. Not such wild, drawn out fluctuations. Currently I am on the "up" side of the pole, and I won't be surprised if that lasts a while until I hover down most ruthlessly. Medication isn't a tool at my disposal currently, but I was last on Seroquel 600mg, Lithium 900mg and Xanax 1mg as needed. Therapy was twice a month, which is nothing. I hope to start up every week once I'm done and settled with moving. Thankfully I haven't hit one of my incredible highs or lows since being unmedicated (I have swung really fiercely, just no suicide attempts or blatant tears from reality), but the fear of such is always nagging at me. Really don't want to have to break, but I do need to wait for help. Just a few more weeks. Good thread idea by the way, I'm just none too sure of the amount of manic depressives around here. __________________ Your tongue is a rudder. It steers the whole ship. Sends your words past your lips Or keeps them safe behind your teeth. But the wrong words will strand you. Come off course while you sleep. Sweep your boat out to sea Or dashed to bits on the reef. - Brand New

08-02-2011, 01:40 PM	#3 (permalink)
Monroee Status: Circus Freak Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: USA. Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 3,059	Thanks for replying, dear. You've been having a REALLY rough time lately. As you've been sharing with me. I really hope you start feel better soon, or can at least see a doctor/therapist. When is your next therapist appointment? Are we the only two people with Bipolar Disorder? Not even anyone with Cyclothymia?? __________________ (((>.<)))

08-02-2011, 01:51 PM	#4 (permalink)
Fromheretoeternity Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: in a dark city Gender: Female Age: 16 Posts: 527	I have Bipolar Disorder and I'm getting treated for it with 300 mg of Quetiapine which helps my hallucinations and stables my moods. My moods were like a rollercoaster and when I first started taking my medication and when I was discharged from hospital I tried to commit suicide and continued cutting myself but now I see the benefits of my medication. Yes, my low self-esteem isn't the best but hopefully later in time it'll develop. __________________ "The darkness is death - we can speak, but we are not heard. We can scream but they turn their backs. We can run, but we cannot catch them. It is the dream where arms and legs won't work the way they should, and the air is too thick to breathe. Loved ones walk a mile ahead, forgetting to stop as we fall behind. This is the reality of the darkness. We are buried alive inside ourselves."-Dana-Christene Umanetz

08-02-2011, 02:44 PM	#5 (permalink)
Monroee Status: Circus Freak Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: USA. Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 3,059	Nice to see another Bipolar here, FromHeretoEternity. Wow - you are really young to be diagnosed & medicated for Bipolar Disorder. It shocks me & I feel horrible that teenagers can be afflicted with it so early & have to destroy the best years of their life. I know depression destroyed mine. I didn't start experiencing hypomania until around 17-18. Then mania at 19-20. On the other hand, its good that you're getting treatment right now, to prevent the kindling effect. Where the Bipolar gets worse over time & becomes treatment-resistant. I was put on the wrong medications & now I'm a rapid-cycler, also because it went untreated when it started. I only got properly diagnosed about a month ago when I was hospitalized for mania. That's when doctors finally saw it. I was self-diagnosed for a bit though once my hypomania started to get more severe. I want to lower my medication however because of severe everyday headaches & feeling extremely blunted in emotions & personality. __________________ (((>.<)))

08-02-2011, 03:03 PM	#7 (permalink)
Monroee Status: Circus Freak Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: USA. Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 3,059	Thanks, I hope I find the right combination as well. Lamictal worked great when it was at 200 mg. But then the mania & anger came out of literally nowhere, so they upped it along with the anti-psychotic. So, we are with really good drugs, just not sure of the correct dosages yet. Yeah, anti-depressants are well-known for making Bipolar Disorder worse. I took Effexor (an anti-depressant) & I ended up with my largest & longest mania. __________________ (((>.<)))

08-02-2011, 03:07 PM	#8 (permalink)
Moselle Status: SAS Member Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: USA Gender: Female Age: 19 Posts: 32	I have never been professionally diagnosed as bipolar, but I've shown enough signs of it that I believe I probably have it. I mentioned it to my boyfriend ages ago to get his opinion since he's taken at least 3 years of psychology, but he called me a hypochondriac. Then just recently he told me he thinks I might be bipolar. I've learned to hide when it happens because I didn't want others to think I was crazy. Usually if I'm upset and then suddenly fine I'll sit quietly for some time as though I'm still unhappy or just feeling neutral instead of just acting happy right away. It's much harder to hide going from happy to upset though. I can be in a great mood and then suddenly sadness or anger slaps me in the face. I realize I don't have a severe case of bipolar disorder, but I also feel like it's just budding. Hopefully it won't ever get too severe. It's rough knowing how to cope with it. Most people don't understand it very well. I always feel like people think bipolar means that you don't have enough self control to act right or that you take things too seriously or are just overly dramatic. :/ People just aren't educated on topics like these. I took a semester each of psychology and sociology so I have to remind myself that I have a semester more of understanding than most people I'll meet. (Not trying to sound cocky. A lot of high schools don't offer those courses and only a limited number of students can actually take them.)

08-02-2011, 03:12 PM	#10 (permalink)
Monroee Status: Circus Freak Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: USA. Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 3,059	Is it possible that you could make an appointment with a doctor? That might be beneficial for you, Moselle. I totally agree about the misconceptions about Bipolar Disorder & the ignorance about it. I'm a Psychology of Abnormal Behaviour Major in college, so I'm more aware of psychological disorders than mostly everyone around me. I got interested in once I started experiencing flipping depressions & I wanted to know what was wrong with me. After that - I wanted to be a therapist. Anyways - my father is the worst however. When I told him he said, "all women are Bipolar". Wow... thanks for trivializing, Dad. Edit: I also thought I was just a mild case of Bipolar, but it got incredibly worse over the past year. It usually gets worse if left untreated. It usually comes out in the early twenties. __________________ (((>.<)))

08-02-2011, 03:16 PM	#11 (permalink)
Fromheretoeternity Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: in a dark city Gender: Female Age: 16 Posts: 527	My dad didn't think I had Bipolar, he thought it was just me being a teenager then when I saw a psychiatrist. He thought I was just a little bit depressed. He didn't think I had it because he said to the psychiatrist, " I don't think she has Bipolar because my uncle has it and he saw aliens." __________________ "The darkness is death - we can speak, but we are not heard. We can scream but they turn their backs. We can run, but we cannot catch them. It is the dream where arms and legs won't work the way they should, and the air is too thick to breathe. Loved ones walk a mile ahead, forgetting to stop as we fall behind. This is the reality of the darkness. We are buried alive inside ourselves."-Dana-Christene Umanetz

08-02-2011, 03:18 PM	#12 (permalink)
Monroee Status: Circus Freak Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: USA. Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 3,059	That's kind of ironic because if your/his uncle had it, than that makes it even more likely that you have it, since its genetic. Hah. Also - it takes quite a few years before it starts coming out full-blown. Like I mentioned. It only started becoming life-threatening when I turned 19-20. __________________ (((>.<)))

08-02-2011, 03:22 PM	#13 (permalink)
Fromheretoeternity Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: in a dark city Gender: Female Age: 16 Posts: 527	His uncle isn't genetically part of the family as I've been told. I don't think my dad understood that it takes quite a few years for it to come out full-blown. __________________ "The darkness is death - we can speak, but we are not heard. We can scream but they turn their backs. We can run, but we cannot catch them. It is the dream where arms and legs won't work the way they should, and the air is too thick to breathe. Loved ones walk a mile ahead, forgetting to stop as we fall behind. This is the reality of the darkness. We are buried alive inside ourselves."-Dana-Christene Umanetz

08-02-2011, 06:56 PM	#14 (permalink)
jokatemcd Status: SAS Member Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: Albany NY Gender: Female Posts: 22	hi - i was reading up on the thread, and i wanted to say hello to my fellow bi-polars i've been living with it for 18 years now and still havent gotten it fully under control. I was 14 when things started going crazy for me and beyond just depression... ive been on pretty much every med you can think of to try at all different levels... im on an interesting med cocktail at the moment that seems to be helping. i, too, would love to have this thread continue, as i also do not know many people with bipolar who are willing to really talk about it, especially as adults... i just downloaded the android app for this site, too, so i am hoping to keep in close contact! lol im off now to fill out my profile so hopefully by the time anyone reads this there will be some info about me to find out, too. thanks - Jo

08-03-2011, 06:04 AM	#15 (permalink)
Monroee Status: Circus Freak Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: USA. Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 3,059	Welcome to SAS, jokatemcd. Glad to see you found this thread. It's amazing how many people here keep showing up & saying they have this disorder. I'd love to hear more about your experience with it when you get the time. __________________ (((>.<)))

08-03-2011, 07:15 AM	#16 (permalink)
Monroee Status: Circus Freak Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: USA. Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 3,059	I now understand why my doctor wanted to sedate me so.. I'm crying like a f-king baby right now & am borderline suicidal. (NOT that I have a plan, don't take this the wrong way) but I feel very much depressive right now. No need to give me advice, that's what PsychForums is for. __________________ (((>.<)))

08-03-2011, 09:26 AM	#17 (permalink)
Rest or Real? Status: Nunca; nadie Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: USA Gender: Male Age: 23 Posts: 1,191	You'll be all good, EGD, I just know it. To anyone with bipolar disorder: Do you find obsessing to be a prominent force, be it with a person, a hobby, anything? I know it isn't uncommon to choose something and be overtly passionate about for a period of time before becoming burn out. Just wondering, I may have a form of OCD. For example, I listen to the same song over and over daily, and have been for a couple months now, haha. The song changes, and I listen to other music interspersed between the constant replaying of the song I am obsessed with, but I just find it a little odd that it can hamper my mood if I don't hear the song at least a few times. LOL I sound ridiculous, hooray MI. __________________ Your tongue is a rudder. It steers the whole ship. Sends your words past your lips Or keeps them safe behind your teeth. But the wrong words will strand you. Come off course while you sleep. Sweep your boat out to sea Or dashed to bits on the reef. - Brand New

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08-03-2011, 10:18 AM	#18 (permalink)
Monroee Status: Circus Freak Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: USA. Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 3,059	I think obsessing is common in mania. I know you've been quite manic for awhile, Tenebrous. & Thanks for the reassurance. __________________ (((>.<)))

08-04-2011, 09:17 PM	#19 (permalink)
guppy88 Status: SAS Member Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: United States Gender: Male Posts: 528	They say I'm bipolar, but I doubt I have it. They put me on lithium for a long while, but I stopped because I knew I wasn't bipolar, and I'm fine now. I'm trying to get into the air force, and i'm hoping a few year in the fire department and getting my EMT-P will change their mind, but I'm digressing. If you're bipolar it's important to know that your emotions will change when you're feeling bad.

08-05-2011, 09:25 AM	#20 (permalink)
ladyloveless Status: SAS Member Join Date: Aug 2011 Posts: 1	They told me I was bipolar and I went through a bit of counseling but my mum basically refused to believe that anything was wrong with me. She's just sort of pretended it didn't exist and I never really got any sort of help. I just turned 18 a few months ago. I don't have a car or a job or anything. I don't know what to do; I know that I need help. Right now I'm at that sort of mellow in between low and high, which I know wont last much longer. I can feel myself slipping into deep depression and I don't know what to do.