Anyone else do this?
Even though I have been working steadily for about 7 years, meaning I have plenty saved up, that I have earned myself and so should be able to buy whatever I like with it. I really worry when I want to spend a large amount of money on something I want.
In the past, it's always been on things like a new TV, or feeling like I should wait for prices on new consoles to drop before I buy them. But currently, there is a concert that I really want to go to. I always use a particular ticket exchange website so I can get really good seats, which means I always pay far more than I should BUT, I have done this for 4 or 5 concerts in the past few years and they are always really great experiences. As long as I am with at least one friend, I can deal with the crowds/travel etc.
But even though I know I will enjoy it and not regret spending the money, I still always have this internal fight before I "pull the trigger" on purchases. Like I am scared that somehow I'll wake up tomorrow and have no money and will need all my savings. Or maybe I feel a kind of guilt for such an extravagant expenditure on myself, when some people can barely afford food, gas etc. Even though I have done it maybe once or at most, 2 times a year. I think part of me feels too that I don't deserve to be happy, so I shouldn't treat myself. And it's always in the back of my mind like, "You shouldn't be blowing savings on concerts, it should be for "serious," "grown up" things like a house."
Hell, sometimes I even agonize over a 99p iTunes download like, "Will I listen to the song enough times to make it worth it?" "Do I really like this song, or do I just think I do because I'm hearing it a lot lately?" Even though it's a 6 year old song and the only reason I'm hearing it a lot is because I specifically searched it out on YouTube to listen to it.
Anyone else get like this?