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Hate the office atmosphere

2K views 11 replies 11 participants last post by  JamesM2 
#1 ·
I've worked at my place which is a large printing company for 10 years, been in the office for about 6 years. There's about 12 people in our open plan office who do Repro which is what I do and there's account managers and the 2 MD's. I still can't after all these years feel comfortable around them, there's a few little gangs who constantly talk to each other, but there's me and 2 others who do the same job and we are constantly busy so there is less chat but we get on.

I just hate being sat there alone with the others talking about what they've done at the weekend or where they're going on holiday and I can't join in, I sometimes feel like they don't know I'm in the room and tonight while they were talking I just had the urge to escape the room and luckily it was finishing time anyway, but I just had to get out with a slight feeling of panic. This is my everyday feeling and I can't relax.

Ah that felt better! :)
 
#2 ·
I feel the same way although I'm new at my job and I do talk to everyone. If there's ever a group of people talking and I'm not joining in I feel bad. The thing is I typically don't want to join in unless there's a person around that I have some interest in , I just feel like people will think negatively about me if I'm not joining in and usually I wouldn't care, but in a job environment you kind of need to make people like you so your life is easier. I don't have much to tell you besides look forward to the days your off.
 
#4 ·
I don't mind working by myself especially when I'm busy because I had newbies making small talk with me and standing too close. I take my personal space seriously. A few months later, those newcomers ignore me and hit it off with other coworkers. Our boss decided to hire three guys who were already friends. Being in the office was obviously a pain in the *** with those rowdy guys.
 
#5 ·
That's painful. What I can tell you about this from my experience is that people and situations are dynamic, up to a certain extent.

I worked in an open office before, when the elevator doors opened all the people from the different sections were noticeable. That was overwhelming for me.

In my section I felt ignored, people were chatting and I had a difficult time to jump into the conversation.

To make small changes I noticed I need to watch better what kind of nutrition I consume, that I sleep enough, make healthy choices.

And eat some sugary products at times to keep my energy flowing.

Volunteering also worked for me.

Reading and watching useful stuff so you can jump into a interesting conversation at the right pace.

At that time (in the office) I was a red bull addict, I drunk like 3 cans a day.

Since I abstained from red bull and soft drinks in general I sleep and feel better.

I drinks loads of water, white and green tea and at times orange juice and some red wine.

What's a lovely activity before getting out of bed is visualization (in my opinion)

I visualize myself during a social interaction or while I'm working. Not what I'm saying but how I say it.

I believe you can attract or expel people with the way you move and talk. Play with it, it's fun :)

If you guys can add some advice that would be great.

A long post, I hope you guys forgive me ?..
 
#6 ·
I tell you what sucks, my company was "small" we had an office section and a factory section, was about 6-7 of us in the office and 10-12 in the factory.

6-7 in an office environment was..cosy but it was 5 women and 2 guys, the women all happily talked to each other while me and the other guy quietly sat and got on with our own work as we had different roles. I felt awkward when there was less than 6-7 of us as it sometimes meant I'd have to talk!

But now the company has downsized, the boss didnt need the stress, now the office is like 3 at most, quite often 2 (me and one of the women) that just means theres a whole lot of expectation for me to speak otherwise its dead silent and my god is it quiet...I just have nothing to say, I can't do small talk, I cant talk about what I did at the weekend as I didn't do anything, she has a child, I can't talk about kids because I don't have or want any, its so damn forced...

At least its laid back, I guess, or its suppose to be, everything says it is and I just nod and agree yet inside I certainly don't feel laid back!
 
#7 ·
I've worked in a few office environments. In my first job, which I was at for just over nine years, I worked between two offices. The accounts and the sales office. Fortunately, both were small and I never had to work with more than two or three people. I could handle it. They never had any social events, Christmas Parties or anything like that. In the sales office, it was a case of come in, do your job, perhaps have a small amount of banter and go home again at the end of the day. We all faced in the same direction also, so there was no direct eye contact or anything like that. You had to physically turn in your chair to look at people, talk to them e.t.c. The accounts office was a little more stressful because I had to work near the Finance Director (our depot was also the head office of the company) – who I absolutely loathed for about eight of those nine years.

I was made redundant from there in the summer of 2010. I can’t say I miss the place even though it was only a few miles from home and very convenient. My position basically become untenable after they slowly but surely removed work from me and distributed it around others – including someone who I actually trained up only months earlier. Constructive dismissal, basically. I ended up being signed off by my doctor with anxiety, stress and depression for four weeks (I could see what was happening, despite everyone denying it) before my redundancy notice was given to me. Oh yes – this was on my first day back from sick leave. What a wonderful ‘welcome back’ present… :rolleyes:

In my current job, which I’ve been at for almost five years, the social situation is considerably worse for someone with SA. It’s an open plan office in which I work with six other people – all women. There’s two ‘pods’ of three (basically desks put together in a square) and two desks at each end – of which I’m at one of them. So, there’s a lot of overlooking each other in this job compared to the last. The pay is a little better (still barely more than minimum wage) and the atmosphere is usually okay. We have two directors. One you basically see once or twice a day as he walks through the office to make his coffee. The other has a more ‘hands on’ role and is the ultimate ‘Jekyll and Hyde’ character. Never mind judging his mood from week to week, or even day to day. His mood can literally change by the hour. :shock

All my current job has done is show up all my lack of basic social skills and my inability to be accepted by others. It’s actually forced me to join in with things and mix with people. Some say it’s good for me and to be honest, I have put in a lot of effort to try and break out of my shell. I’ve taken it as an opportunity to try to really change myself for the better, even though I’ve made myself ill in doing so. However, all it’s really done is show me that despite my best efforts, still no one wants to know me unless they're criticising me or making jokes at my expense. I knew this as a teenager, had a bit of a break away from it in my early twenties, made an effort to change myself in my latter twenties and now that I'm 30 – I’ve come a full circle and back with the opinion I had as a teenager. Only this time I'm wiser, I've tried and I know I simply can't make any in-roads to climb the social ladder. I'm still very much on the bottom rung and in my opinion, now kept there by others rather than it all being down to myself. Try to climb it (i.e - join in conversations or start you're own) and you're very quickly made to feel as though you're three inches tall. Not once, not twice but every single time. :(

I've learnt over the years that SA is something others need to understand and help you deal with. It’s not something you can fix all by yourself. Sadly, next to no one understands the condition and merely see you as a moaner or someone being purposefully awkward – when infact we're only responding to the treatment we get. Well – that's how I see it anyway.

Roll on retirement. It can't come soon enough. :time
 
#8 ·
Had a job for 10 years?

you're an elite astronaut.

I had peak duration of 3 months glory for three decades
then about 3 days maximum

Then ratchet mechanism is a one-way road. One lost job = Never allowed to work. Dropped for how long? Finding next for a day = not ever any job, ever. Classified criminal. Industry purpose is to ensure no work. >:)
 
#9 ·
you're an elite astronaut.

I had peak duration of 3 months glory for three decades
then about 3 days maximum

Then ratchet mechanism. Dropped for how long? Finding next for a day = not ever any job, ever. Classified criminal. Industry purpose is to ensure no work. >:)
The way he says it is fairly decent and careful.
The times that we have the job is bound to the masonry.
 
#10 ·
I wouldn't want to work for a company who publishes a vacancy

Every job I had was in a crumbling business. They want my help to fix things.

A boss wants to find an elite operand better than anyone else

I never thought of verifying a company's success by GDP, turnover

I took every job and liked the jobs. Everywhere I went, others got redundancy where I was in the meeting - about news... we're letting these teams go... you, and you... and (me) has to stay. Or people disappeared around me without knowing before, at several places I've been.

More comfy about trying recruiters - they wouldn't ever say anything about their clients except `Fantastic!`

I've wanted to question about the status and why it's come up which is easy on both sides but the employee left or booted out, or company needs something and quiz me bout my last place - when ended and Why!?

Stirring a bowl of soup of turmoil. Not just unemployment candidate is miserable or company in a mess. Recession
 
#11 ·
I work in an office with just 2 other people though people from other departments come in and out. Anyway all the people in my office talk about is the weather, what they did at the weekend, commenting how long it is to the next weekend, what they watched on TV, DAY IN DAY OUT ugggh! I'd MUCH prefer just full on silence all day than listen to that. And when they're not talking about that it's just shady talking about other co workers. My Office Manager is the most 2 faced person I've ever known, as nice as pie to everyone's face then gossips and slags you off behind your back
 
#12 ·
Open office environments are great places for extroverts - not so great for extreme introverts such as myself. It's very uncomfortable to be sitting at a desk in the middle of a room with heaps of people coming and going behind me all the time, or (my personal pet hate), stopping right behind me to have a conversation with each other while I'm trying to work. Every phone call I make people can hear, everything I'm working on or reading in my spare time people can see on my monitor.

All in all it's a lot like high school, complete with the popular kids who can't do anything wrong - everything they do is apparently absolutely hilarious and when they're not around everyone's like "OMG where's so-and-so!? Did you hear what he said earlier today - OMG it was sooo funny!!". I have to put my earphones on to drown out the incessant chatter - people discussing their weekends, where they're going on holiday, and so on. Next to no work gets done in the mornings because everyone is too busy arranging their lunch plans with each other, and forget about any work getting done at all on Fridays because all anyone can talk about is the weekend and how much alcohol they're going to drink when they get home.
 
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