Originally Posted by LostInReverie
1. That's what I was wondering. Where's the motivation? Is he happy or isn't he? Happiness should always be the motivation, no?.
In my life, happiness and health are, about 99% of the time, motivational for me. Being healthy is being happy, but being happy doesn't mean you're healthy. Ultimate strength comes from a balance of happiness and health. Like I said, what's the ideal place for an SAer? Behind locked doors. But you can't truly expect to go on living your life behind doors: it's unrealistic and unhealthy. I know someone who is diagnosed with drug-induced psychosis. To him, life is perfect. He loves every aspect of it and he's "happy" (he's clean, now, too). BUT, he went to a different school last year, he hasn't seen his friends in over 2 years (and these are kids he's been friends with since he could walk/talk). He claims he's happy, which is fine, but is he leading a normal life? No. Is he in the position to go out and get a job? No. Does he have a girlfriend? No. Is he in any way mentally stable enough to interact with the world and have friends, etc, etc? No. You can lead a life where it's just you and your happiness, but you aren't gonna make a difference in the world. You aren't going to fulfill your happiness to the extent which it was made to reach. I hope you understand what I'm saying, and that I'm only trying to help. Do you have any friends? Anyone you can talk to in person? Are you happy? Are you healthy? Just think about it for a second. The nice thing about our lives is that we can say no at any time of the day and change. We can't go back in time and change what happened, but our timely decisions can definitely affect how our future will be. That's the beauty of living. You could get up from your computer right now and say, "You know what? F this. I'm unhappy and I don't wanna continue living like this, and I'm not going to, because I don't have to. I wanna be happy and I know that I can be happy if I wanna be happy". You have so many positive qualities about you. Everyone does. And if I could meet everyone on SAS, I would, and I guarantee I could find wonderful and beautiful things about everyone. Anyone could. You just need to sit down and get to know the person. But first, you need to get to know yourself. What do you wanna do? What are your goals and ambitions? Work on them. Life isn't a prison-sentence, so don't live it that way.
Originally Posted by LostInReverie
2. If I could, I would, dude. Not everyone is as strong as you are. I never claimed my life was rational. If my fear is strong enough to stop me from interacting with others, then I suppose it must be worth it.
Is it worth it? If your fear is strong enough to make you be scared of others, that doesn't mean it's a rational fear or that it's "worth it"; it simply means that you've let it gain far too much power. If something is impeding you from living a normal life, then it needs to be adjusted. It's hard, yes. And it may even sound totally unrealistic and irrational, since you've been living a life of fear and anxiety for longer than you can even remember, but that doesn't mean that it can't be ameliorated. I know you seem to be opposed to the stereotypical social upbringing, but to function in our world, you need to function in society. It doesn't mean you have to conform, but it means you have to function. Look at Hunter S. Thompson or at The Beatles or all these eccentric figures, who despite their differences, not only functioned in society, but even revolutionized societys' ways of thinking. This obviously doesn't mean you should go out and change the world tomorrow, but it means that it's all in your reach; it's in anyone's reach, but some people just have to work harder than others to actually reach for it.