When you feel rejected/are rejected
Being someone with social anxiety my emotional and social levels are probably retarded compared to a person who has a lot of friends. I was curious to know if when you feel rejected you feel a strong emotional outburst and almost can't control yourself? I've tried to make friends posting on forums where normal people post and such, and I am always usually rejected or ignored for some reason. When I begin to sense that people dislike me I will (often get drunk) and make really messed up posts insulting people, talking about how great I am, hitting on peoples girlfriends, post nude pictures that girls had sent me of themselves (things that would get someone beaten the hell up if it were real life) and then I will just leave the forum. I always feel terrible about it after the fact, I'm really not a jerk or a mean person but it seems that people don't even like the nice me. I've noticed a lot of trolls do the same (but they usually start off as trolls) I just become a troll I think because nobody could ever really like me or be my friend, even when I try to open up and be myself. It's a desperate need for attention but if no one likes me just being me, I think it's the only way I can get people to notice me. It's difficult to explain really. I just feel like some kind of feral animal trapped in a corner and in desperation my personality changes.
It's the same in real life for me as well I think, but I'm a passive person, so when I feel rejected and have no friends (my old job the only person who'd talked to me after 1 1/2 years of working their was some mexican gangster who would just bully and insult me) I feel the same way except I react by just wanting to kill myself or become a drug addict or something. Sucks being a natural loser I suppose.