Okay so I know that I have SA even though I have never been to the doctors or anything. Every time I want to ask my parents to go to the doctors or to find help I end up crying because I am terrified of going. In school I have just been there and talked to two people tops while in a class. I would have had all A's in my classes, but in Science I could not talk in front of my class and give a presentation.
I was able to live with that, but during about the last month of school I have been having stomach issues. My stomach constantly felt "like butterflies" or really light, almost nauseous but not quite. Then it was about the last week of school i began feeling like I would have to run to a bathroom all the time, whether it was coming out from above or below
On the last day of school me and my friends were going to go to skating plus for a Birthday party. I knew that I wasn't going to be able to handle it, but I didn't want to miss the party. I went and everything was good till after about 2 hours which left 1 hour of agony left. I took a sip from my drink and felt like I was instantly going to throw up every where. I went to go skate which helped. (I kinda suck at skating so I kept falling on my knee) After falling the fifth time on the same knee I had to rest. I was really thirsty and hungry so I took a bite of cake and a sip of the drink. Automatically felt it again! I rushed to the bathroom about 5 minutes later, and I had diarrhea. I felt so embarrassed I just wanted to die! I got through it and just skated the rest of the night then left.
But today my mom and sister wanted me to go walking with them a couple of miles. I thought, "alright, what could go wrong?" Got ready and was about to leave when right when we were leaving I felt like I was going to barf. Told them I didn't want to go and my sister just said, "fine be lazy." And I regretted not going with them so I just went by myself. I felt fine going by myself I just couldn't handle going with them. They went farther than me so I got back home first. When they got back I tried to get some courage up and tell them I was scared to go with other people for some reason. All I got out was, "The reason I didn't go with you was because I couldn't handle it." So they assumed I couldn't handle walking as far as they did, which I don't blame them, I would assume that to. Went to my room and here I am.
So I don't know what wrong with me anymore. I thought it was just SA but I think I might also have IBS? Also I heard of this agoraphobia. IDK what it is but I want to find out. But also like I said I am too scared to talk to my parents about it, let alone a doctor about it. I would love to get help I just don't know how to get the courage, every time I try to say something I end up crying.