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Old 08-27-2011, 11:10 PM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Default Whats an excuse you've used to cancel plans

I intern at this small agency, I love the people I work with they are very cool, and easy going. But My anxiety keeps me from being myself. I barley ever talk when there.

This pass friday everyone was going to go rock climbing, I was all set to go but I canceled giving the excuse that I am sore from working out and didn't feel I could do it. I do work out but wasn't THAT sore.

I just chickend out. Thought it would be to awkward. I really wanted to go, I gave myself the, "I wanna go back to sleep" excuses.. I didn't even believe the lie I told myself.


Anyone function 'properly' in the work place or school despite their anxiety??

What excuse have YOU used to cancel plans???
I would appreciate any advice
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Old 08-27-2011, 11:12 PM   #2 (permalink)
 
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I'm too desperate for attention to cancel any plans.
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Old 08-27-2011, 11:59 PM   #3 (permalink)
 
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I've deliberately missed trains before
Pretended I had a dentist/doctor's appointment
Also just repetitively saying "no" until they eventually give up asking and trying to persuade you, or just disappearing off somewhere and ignoring my phone and seeing how many missed calls I get before they give up lol
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Old 08-28-2011, 12:27 AM   #4 (permalink)
 
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I think I'm dying.
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Old 08-28-2011, 01:32 AM   #5 (permalink)
 
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I've had a tendency to just not show up to things. Which obviously makes you feel even worse in the long run.

The first time I was invited out with my current (very small) group of friends I actually showed up. It was at quite a busy bar and as I arrived started having a panic attack seeing so many people around. So I just left. The worst part is one of them saw me there
Thankfully they did invite me out again and that time I plucked up the courage to do it. And it was one of the most fun nights out I can remember, not that I have many to draw upon lol. So I guess just going for it pays off.
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Old 08-28-2011, 03:46 AM   #6 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by xyzhousexyz View Post
What excuse have YOU used to cancel plans???
I would appreciate any advice
DON'T refuse invitations when you have SA. It's one of the worst things to do.

Believe me, when you're cancelling a party after another party, you'll end up being alone because then no one would want to invite you again !

I know how anxiety works, I know how it feels to chicken out because of that. But you owe it to yourself to not listen to your unfounded fears.
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Old 08-28-2011, 06:50 AM   #7 (permalink)
 
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I usually say I have got to help out a family member.... That usually works!!

I've never been a fan of hanging out with work people, I have to sit with them for over thirty hours per week, why on earth do I want to see them anymore?
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Old 08-28-2011, 07:36 AM   #8 (permalink)
 
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I used to tell people that I was grounded... but that made everyone think I was some sort of bad egg. :O Now I just tell people that I already have plans with some other friends (I usually don't).
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Old 08-28-2011, 07:42 AM   #9 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
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DON'T refuse invitations when you have SA. It's one of the worst things to do.

Believe me, when you're cancelling a party after another party, you'll end up being alone because then no one would want to invite you again !

I know how anxiety works, I know how it feels to chicken out because of that. But you owe it to yourself to not listen to your unfounded fears.
You can say that again, I've kinda learned that the hard way. Now nobody ever really wants to hang out with me.

Anywho, the excuses I've used:

-I'm not feeling too good because of (my period, stomach ache, food poisoning, etc).
-Oh I have some family stuff to take care of!
-I have to take my brother to places, sorry!
-I have homework to take care of, gosh I got so much this weekend!
-Mom isn't letting me go (I don't use this as much anymore cuz it makes me look like an idiot at 20 yrs old... but seriously though -- she hardly lets me go anywhere yet kicks me out of the house on random days I got nothing planned for)
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Old 08-28-2011, 07:53 AM   #10 (permalink)
 
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My period!!!
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Old 08-28-2011, 08:08 AM   #11 (permalink)
 
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Sometimes i intentionally sleep deprive myself or have an irregular sleep cycle before something to make sure I won't feel like going.
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Old 08-28-2011, 09:06 AM   #12 (permalink)
 
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You should never turn down an invite somewhere if you are bored/tired of sitting doing nothing. Sometimes my friends would invite me clubbing or whatever and I'l just be honest and say I'm not in the mood. If they ask why I would say straight ' It's a waste of money,and I'm gonna come home depressed because I didn't get any action anyways'. That would usually get them off my back.
Rock climbing would have been fun.I love it when there is an good activity to do because it usually diffuses any social tension or anxiety. I have been to a few get togethers before that are wack. You walk into the place and there is no getting outdoors to breathe or any pool table or ANYTHING to do. just people sitting in a circle talking.that is wack.

Yeah you should just tag along because it's true what people are saying above...if you keep turning them down, don't get angry or surprised when you are never invited again. This happened to me and my best friend had the decency to tell me off.

But haha if I was a women I would use the period as an excuse over and over again. Nobody fcks with that lovely topic
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Old 08-28-2011, 09:34 AM   #13 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Aedan View Post
DON'T refuse invitations when you have SA. It's one of the worst things to do.

Believe me, when you're cancelling a party after another party, you'll end up being alone because then no one would want to invite you again !

I know how anxiety works, I know how it feels to chicken out because of that. But you owe it to yourself to not listen to your unfounded fears.
Amen.
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Old 08-28-2011, 09:40 AM   #14 (permalink)
 
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http://www.youtube.com/v/OF4mlPxVWUk
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Old 08-28-2011, 09:51 AM   #15 (permalink)
 
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I don't make excuses most of the time. I'm usually dragging my awkward self wherever I have to go.
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Old 08-28-2011, 11:05 AM   #16 (permalink)
 
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I have to work out, I have homework, I have to work in the morning, I fell asleep so you and should have called me to wake me up, I promised to help my dad/friend/etc. with something, I'm sick.
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Old 08-28-2011, 12:35 PM   #17 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Aedan View Post
DON'T refuse invitations when you have SA. It's one of the worst things to do.

Believe me, when you're cancelling a party after another party, you'll end up being alone because then no one would want to invite you again !

I know how anxiety works, I know how it feels to chicken out because of that. But you owe it to yourself to not listen to your unfounded fears.
Agreed, though I still have trouble accepting invitations to go out with a person and their friends when I don't know the person in question (e.g roommate) too well.

I can't help but feel phony when I lie, even when it's for a good cause -- there aren't too many good causes out there. I'd rather just tell the people/person no, or ignore their calls.
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Old 08-28-2011, 02:00 PM   #18 (permalink)
 
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I use so much lies to cancel things because I chicken out like 10-15 minutes before the actual thing..

And I have a feeling I will do it again this Tuesday .. I know myself by now , I am prepared for it but at the last minute I will chicken out - I know , I know it is a very bad thing to do since you always have to confront your SA to eventually overcome it..
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