just registered so i could reply. so yup im new here.
i havent read all of the responses but i feel i have read enough and very much want to input my feeling/ideas/learning's. please read, i intend to help. hope i do. i will summarize and bullet point to avoid epic assay.
1) many of you guys mentioned medication. well. i used to be in 500 mg of quetiapine and have had all of that kind off malarkey.
my point here is, these are a number one culprit. many of the work blocking messages. hint hint. tho, they do not help. they are not the soul cause. if possible weening yourself off them very slowly will be almost pain free. it goes tits up when you try and be a hero. don't do that. ask for help. remember they get top dollar for those drugs. sorry meds.
2) sleep. vital for the mind to function. the human body is the best example in the known universe of intelligent life. but, they are flesh and a machine. self care and maintenance are a total must. food for the mind, sleep for the mind. pizza makes you go to sleep. they dont help you mid chat. try fruit, fructose will give you mental energy. it wont work after a stomach full of junk. aim for 9 hours sleep.
3)it seems to me, it has a lot to do with perception here. i have had to learn this the hard way, and its took near obsession to perceive clearly.bias perception is an enemy here.
when we start to talk, and we blank and we panic? hmm. well.
as far as i can see it now. we panic because we know that in the past we froze and looked a goon in public. lets face it, no one, mentally challenged or not want to look a public goon. its not a panic attack from no where, it a very normal fear response. it no biggy. its where it stems from. even tho i am on the ball i still dont like clouded public places. we need to be less self obsessed. sounds offensive to be told that, but its not. its what happens to anyone that is troubled, we start to search internally for the answer and appear self driven. you can do that your hole life if you like. i bet you dont. lol. this causes over self awareness. makes it very difficult to speak in public and makes bad stuff seem unbarable. feels like you might as well be mic'ed up and speaking to the world i know.
what i have found that works is. accept that a good portion of people are in a bad situation themselves and have consciously decided to make everyone else pay for it by being a dick head. these are the people that home in on your troubles and then whoop you with em. no worries. they are in a lot of trouble themselves. shame they cant be more respectable. then theres the other half. the half worth sticking around for. the half that are listening and feel terrible inside with you when you mutter or blank. the people who are a little more emotional advaced i recon. for me, relisizing who was a waist of time until they "saw the light of No need to be a dick". once i new who was sound, and who was not, i then found it easier to speak. a lot less blocking. stop blaming yourself. please. it is you and them speaking.... also,,,, where you about to say something you know you have already said? was it boring? did you stop yourself? perhaps a good job done ? lol
4) method of communication. my most annoying enemy/natural trait, and i bet its yours. because we humans are identical to similar in these ways..... i will say it how i see it as i cant put it into normalish words. we think using what looks like a family tree in my mind. the idea is to get from a to b. to have an idea and portray it aloud. or sometimes just to think, as we blank there to sometimes no? i call it perception and manifestation. sounds cool huh? lol we start at the bottom of this tree and work up to the what we want to say or figure out. the problem we all have is when we mental side track or try to multitask to much info. we should try to take not of ourselves in thought. you tube is the perfect example. your looking at how to fix your car tutorial then half a hour later your looking at rare sea creatures. well, what have they got to do with each other? nothing. how can one expect yourself to to remember car wheel when it has 0 relevance to octopuses our what ever. this is so important in speech. keep the side tracking thought (which has its uses) to the minimum for now. try to say audibly (confidently loud without shouting) your desired statement. dont rush. if you go slowly fine, if you pause. which is definately gonna happen at some point, dont panic its fine. everyone else is healthly nervous too. its normal. those decent people will bare with you. i have a couple of much used frazes. one is. bare with me, my thought have gone, followed by a long errrrmmm.
let me tell you. it is far far far better to pause, think and give a thought out viable answer than it is to be like 95% and just say anything because you like the sound of your own voice to much. they look more stupid than someone pausing for sure. but dont we all sometimes lol. remember. no one can see into your thought. really. no one.
2) eat well, feed mind and body. cars dont run well on meths. same as your mind doesnt run well on sucrose and gluten starch crud. i eat junk food. just minimally. especially when this issue plays me up bad.
3)perception. are you looking at it through your own glasses. ofcourse you are. lol
try to see it from other angles. its a good idea to a a degree of trust in what is said. so that you can bounce ideas with blocking yourself. for example. i think that guys trying to be smart and take the jiff. well. these days i would have the same thought followed buy. something like. oh well, what a bad example of a human. (INTERNALLY) then i say my piece. truth is, he might be toying with you. but stuff him. every one of those decent people whom i talked of, thinks the person being like this is a total door nob. same as you. they are with you. and if they are not. Time to question yourself if they are who you would like to spend your time with. i wont sit near those sorts anymore. they are toxic. they need to man up and grow up. there loss and bad skills.
4) method of comunication/thinking method/ thought to mouth/ what ever lol
DIRECT, LOUD AND CLEAR. ENUNCIATE. NO SIDE TRACKING/THINKING. DONT INTERUPT IF ITS NOT OBVIOUS. BLA BLA.
just one thought for the day. valuable info to free you from troubles.
define in your mind the deference between worry and paranoia. are paranoid? really? i bet you are not all of the time that you think you are.
paranoia is irrational worry. worry without any reason.
i dont need to explain worry to anyone. but one is rational the other irrational. both are normal human traits. add this to real life. you will notice you are having normal human worries and you are not as messy as you will have yourself believe. start to believe in yourself without adding unrealistic pressure, and this issue will become the past.
although life is a mixture of good and bad things, its not ever one or the other solely. so it cant be all bad, or good. you will never know so relax and go with the flow.
sorry if its a bit broken worded. my head is too at this momment. sleep deprived. thats ok tho. im gonna nurture my self better. and get some decent sleep.
i really hope anyone who read this can draw from it the possitve ideas about life i have shared...... generally, it is the hopeless that become the hope.