Sometimes i can't laugh or smile - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-05-2010, 06:38 PM Thread Starter
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Sometimes i can't laugh or smile

whenever i'm in class or lunch and socializing with workers, i have a hard time laughing or even smiling at their jokes. I think it's probably a facial muscle thats not letting me do this and really bugs me. could this be part of anxiety and what can i do to overcome it! i want to be normal again!
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post #2 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-05-2010, 06:48 PM
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Hey man, I see what you mean.

Even with people close to me sometimes it just feels like I'm not in the mood to be joking around (well not nearly as much as some others want to)..

It's an aspect of myself that I've always despised.

Just try and work around it and learn your limits.

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post #3 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-05-2010, 07:05 PM
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I have a hard time smiling, but only when i'm in a bleh kinda mood witch is most of the time. Looking at funny pictures or vids on the net always helps me. Anxiety probably dose have a role in this. It's hard to smile and laugh when your all stress out and over the edge.
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post #4 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-05-2010, 07:45 PM Thread Starter
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thanks guys for your replies.
means a lot.
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post #5 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-06-2010, 12:07 AM
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I'm like that too. Sometimes I'll find something genuinely funny or I'll see someone smile at me and I'll want to smile back but I can't make myself.
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post #6 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-06-2010, 01:46 PM
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I have a difficult time with this especially when I have something hanging over my head that I'm stressed out about, or sad. I find that I can't focus on what's so funny about the joke someone is telling or why others are laughing because I feel like I'm not there but somewhere else with my thoughts. I put on a fake smile as best as I can to fit in and seem at least a bit amused, even though I'm not technically "there."
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post #7 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-06-2010, 01:59 PM
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My guess would be that it's like the public restroom fear. You can't relax your body from the fear or anxiety which means you can't go to the bathroom. I would say to maybe try some relaxation techniques and see if that may help you enjoy your co-workers jokes.
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post #8 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-07-2010, 06:20 PM Thread Starter
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thank you again.
it happened today. i really hate this, i cant even laugh with my friend one on one anymore. i just feel like leaving, covering my face so they won't see me laugh. i have already taken medication for this but nothing has really changed. i can't go on like this anymore!
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post #9 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-07-2010, 06:44 PM Thread Starter
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im starting to also notice that this only happens when a specific person is in the room. but i dont have a crush on the person. We`re just really close friends..
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post #10 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-07-2010, 09:32 PM
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I have this exact same problem.

Currently taking 20mg of Paroxetine (Seroxat). It's not very useful. Better than nothing.. but only just.
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post #11 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-09-2010, 09:26 AM
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This happens to me too. And like most forms of anxiety, the more you focus on it and try to make it go away, the more trouble it causes. I have a lot of trouble smiling sometimes. Alcohol helps, but obviously is not a real solution ;-)


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post #12 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-09-2010, 09:37 AM
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When speaking on one-on-one, or in a small group, I throw out smiles/smirks every 5 seconds. But if it's like a calssroom, in my job, or especially with strangers trying to small-talk, where out of nowhere someone makes a funny, I can't bring myself to even smirk.
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post #13 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-10-2010, 10:02 AM
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the only time I'm ever able to laugh in front of people is if something really funny comes totally out of left field and I'm caught off guard- as a result I'm branded as not having a sense of humor, which also adds to the general anxiety
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post #14 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-10-2010, 05:37 PM
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Anxietyboy, this is a common symtom of social anxiety. The tension causes facial muscles to freeze. If you're seeing a therapist or have a gp you might want to talk to them about this. It seems to happen mostly with males like other physical signs of nervousness such as excessive sweating or blushing. I've heard of guys who say thy get so tense that they can't even turn their necks. If I remember correctly beta blockers tend to offer some relief. Again talk to your doctor and ask what they recommend. I would imagine this is very distressful for you.

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post #15 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-10-2010, 06:03 PM
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Sometimes I smile too much because of my anxiety and sometimes I can't smile even if I think something's funny. That is mainly due to depression. I recall one particular time I was hanging at a friends with a few other people and they put in a Jeff Dunham dvd and were all laughing but I just couldn't, didn't connect with any of it and they noticed and thought I wasn't enjoying it and kept picking at me....then I watched the same thing at home on my lonesome and laughed a lot.

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post #16 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-10-2010, 06:38 PM Thread Starter
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Thank you all so much again.
Yes it is very stressful and its getting worse! i cant ever stoping thinking about something and it makes me very anxious..
i was having an attack yesterday while eating at a resturaunt with friends. Whenever the attention was on me i would think about it too much which led me to once again not be able to smile...

This is ruining me, i think i might have to go see my doctor about this again!
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post #17 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-10-2010, 06:52 PM
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i hate when im too nervous to smile and then people say "cheer up" because most of the time im not angry or sad im just anxious :/
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post #18 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-11-2010, 12:52 AM
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Try watching something that makes you laugh alot. Then try anchoring that to social situations when others are laughing so you end up thinking about what you watched. I find that im automatically thinking negatively when there is laughter or someone is cracking a joke. Its not a physical problem if you can laugh on your own.
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post #19 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-11-2010, 12:57 PM
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yeah i use to get this a lot before i started taking meds....it made it extremely awkward whenever someone would tell a joke or smile and i couldn't laugh or smile back so i started to try and avoid any situations like that...it really sucked
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post #20 of 31 (permalink) Old 01-11-2010, 05:55 PM Thread Starter
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what meds do you take?
the only one i have taken is called valium
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