Scared

[hmf22]

I did something tonight that let about 10 different people know that somethings wrong with me. I didn't get specific at all, but I know that most likely someones going to ask about it sooner or later. I think I'm ok with that- I know I can talk to these people, and it would be a good for me. The only problem is I feel SO exposed right now. I'm so used to hiding safely inside myself, and right now, it's all out in the open. I'm starting to second guess myself and wonder if I did the right thing, and I feel like at any moment someone could just tear me down now that I'm not safely hid behind the wall I usually put up. It almost feels like I'm in a different reality. It's weird, I'm not used to this feeling, and it's scary!!

[rdrr]

if your talking about tipping people off about your sa; don't get to know pre-med or psych students. they might pick up on it. If you are willing to tell them and beating them to the punch, make sure you are totally confident that you can not worry about it after and have those anxious thoughts get in your head. Putting yourself out there with personal issues is scary because it's something foreign, and people tend to stick to their comfort zones, sa or not. Also it might be a relief you don't have to hide behind the wall anymore and you can just be yourself and accept you have something you'd like help on changing.

[theuprising]

Originally Posted by hmf22

I did something tonight that let about 10 different people know that somethings wrong with me. I didn't get specific at all, but I know that most likely someones going to ask about it sooner or later. I think I'm ok with that- I know I can talk to these people, and it would be a good for me. The only problem is I feel SO exposed right now. I'm so used to hiding safely inside myself, and right now, it's all out in the open. I'm starting to second guess myself and wonder if I did the right thing, and I feel like at any moment someone could just tear me down now that I'm not safely hid behind the wall I usually put up. It almost feels like I'm in a different reality. It's weird, I'm not used to this feeling, and it's scary!!

How could someone tear you down? You shouldn't take anything anyone who doesn't "know" you to heart, they are just judging the outside showcase of you, not YOU. You should listen to the things people who "know" you say since it could allow you to see things differently.

I don't know, the way I see things now is that I see myself something entirely different than my body and mind, but simply the observer, and to a lesser extent, the decider. Anything other people say about me is simply a critique of my mind or body, not ME, but the problems I have, and that's a big distinction. I mean you don't have to make a big spiritual/buddhistesque schism in yourself, but try to differentiate critiques of YOU, from critiques of your mental processes, habits, and other problems you have.

EDIT: when talking to people about your problems, DO NOT be ashamed of them, if you are, it will bring the people around you down with you, and people don't like being dragged down (this is unless, of course, you're going through some venting, in which it is completely appropriate to release pent up emotions). Talk about your problems like what they are, its something your dealing with, everyone has problems they need to deal with.

[Prakas]

I'm not sure what all happened, but hopefully they won't look at you any differently. Are these people really close to you, or just acquiantances?

Overtime the feeling of being scared should go away, you can't change the past and will learn to accept it which is the hard part.

[pixies]

Originally Posted by theuprising

How could someone tear you down? You shouldn't take anything anyone who doesn't "know" you to heart,

Yeah I agree, and in fact, I wouldn't take anyone who doesn't fully understand social anxiety to heart either. I doubt anyone will give you any trouble about it at all, but even if they did, to an 'outsider', social anxiety sounds so silly. Think about it, we are scared of talking to people and scared of going to parties and social situations... When you think about it, it sounds so trivial and so silly. I'm sure some people would be able to understand, but really, I think the only people who could truly understand how devestating and powerful this problem is, are people who have experienced it themselves or experienced something similar.