Really badly want sex and girlfriend

[bluepaint]

I'm 22 years, never had a girlfriend. I've had 2 one night stands - pretty drunk both times. I'm currently under the delision that being drunk is the only way I can meet and attract girls - which means I binge drink a lot which isn't healthy.

I really badly want sex and a girlfriend. It's almost all I think about. I'm quite attractive physically I think & tall (191cm / 6''3).

The problem is: it seems like all girls go for is confidence - which is pretty hard to be when you're very nervous / anxious all the ****ing time.

What do I do? What can I do? Are there any girls that doesn't require you to be confident and skilled socially? And how and where could I meet such girls?

Even just a sexual partner (friend with benefit) would be amazing! Any idea where one might find that? I don't really have any female friends right now.

Anyone else sexually frustrated?

[TPower]

Women are attracted to status. If you have it, confidence is not a factor.

Be cool, be popular. Be the center of attention.

They'll end up in your pants before you know it.

[NoHeart]

Stop whining, there's more to life then your own goddamn sex drive.

[mooncake]

Originally Posted by TPower

Women are attracted to status. If you have it, confidence is not a factor.

Be cool, be popular. Be the center of attention.

They'll end up in your pants before you know it.

Some will, maybe, but what you've just mentioned is a complete turn-off to some of us.

[elvin jones]

If drinking makes you feel relaxed to the point where you are no longer socially anxious, you need to find other ways to recreate that feeling. Or moderate your alcohol consumption. Drugs and alcohol are a crutch that even naturally social people use sometimes.

I say keep meeting girls, even if it is just for hooking up, so you get used to interacting with people. Once your comfort level slowly increases over time you'd be able to do the same thing without alcohol.

[ineedtopunchsomeone]

dfgdfg

[Breakthrough1]

Just tug one....

[custard]

Look for an older woman. Even 10+ years older. They are far more understanding. You have what they want and they will be able to teach you what you need to know. Custard

[awfulness]

Originally Posted by ineedtopunchsomeone

It's okay, I relate. I'm female but I constantly think about sex. It's a problem for both genders with social anxiety.

Also I'm a nympho...so that might be a problem too...

if your problem is that you crave sex, you would have no problem getting it since you're a female. not being sexist, no offense intended, that's just how the gender roles in this society works.. not saying that's going to magically satisfy you. it'll probably feel empty after a while. but regardless, sex is easy for you.

oh, and id have sex with you. like, without even knowing what you look like, just hearing youre a nympho and you crave sex, yea i'd have sex with you. and so would TONS of guys. because that's how guys are.

[thephantommenace]

Originally Posted by awfulness

if your problem is that you crave sex, you would have no problem getting it since you're a female. not being sexist, no offense intended, that's just how the gender roles in this society works.. not saying that's going to magically satisfy you. it'll probably feel empty after a while. but regardless, sex is easy for you.

oh, and id have sex with you. like, without even knowing what you look like, just hearing youre a nympho and you crave sex, yea i'd have sex with you. and so would TONS of guys. because that's how guys are.

Not necessarily. While men are much more forgiving when it comes to financial and social status, they are much more shallow when it comes to looks. If you are a women who is considered below par in physical beauty, men might not approach you.

[Rossy]

Sas=Sex anxiety support

[wildgrl]

I can honestly say- I have ZERO advice when it comes to this. None, zip, nadda.

Originally Posted by ineedtopunchsomeone

It's okay, I relate. I'm female but I constantly think about sex. It's a problem for both genders with social anxiety.

Im not "Nympho", but I definitely am part of this club. Fact is, if anyone knew about how much I think about sex, I think i'd die of embarrassment. And ive even thought about having a one night stand too...just to find out what it feels like to have sex with a guy.

hint:

"Umm..Tara?? Why do you have so many battery chargers?"

[Kakumbus]

Screw the people who say there is are more to life then sex, imo it is irevelant if you are rich or healthy and whatever if you canot get sex EVER. Now i wonder, how the hell do you not feel confident? you had sex with girls twice, that should unlock the part in your brain that makes you believe you can attract a girl.

I used to think, that getting a girl attracted to me was the biggest achievement on earth, now i still think that, the difference is, now i know i can, cause it happened, so i dont feel bad talking to a girl anymore.

[JakeBoston1000]

1st. stay off the computer as much as possible.
2nd. approach as many girls as possible and get rejected alot.
3rd. don't whine when you get blown off and played around with,it's just the way it is for average guys.
there is no 4th. if you do the first three you will get laid.

And yes i have major social anxiety and yes i have been with ALOT of girls and got rejected by ALOT of girls.

To all guys on sas.it's not rocket science, it's called having balls and not stopping until you get what you want.(i am genetically very nervous too so it's no excuse!).I also have crohns disease,no job and no life.(and i'm old and not very bright as well) and i'm still getting laid.(yes, she's good looking and much younger-28.How come i can do it but no one else ever seems to do anything but complain.Unless you are physically extremely unnattractive there are no excuses.If you don't be aggressive and take the initiative and talk to women they will avoid you like the plague.The quiet,nice guy will always be lonely.FAKE IT if you have to.Women won't change but you can(or at least fake it).It is really the only way to get a girl to go out with you.Confidence and personality.(if your not rich or famous that is).

[sweetluvgurl]

Originally Posted by mooncake

Some will, maybe, but what you've just mentioned is a complete turn-off to some of us.

Agreed.

[ineedtopunchsomeone]

hgfghgfh

[hollybambam]

I think you'll find that most girls appear to not be attracted to guys who aren't confident because they aren't sure what said guy wants. If a guy is confident, at least there are less mixed signals. Girls are afraid of rejection too. It's not easy for all girls, I would know.

I'm not attracted to popularity, it scares me. If a guy is popular, there will be too much attention drawn to me. That's all from me :P

[tehuti88]

Whoa! When I tried to post this it told me I didn't have permission so I figured the thread was deleted or something. Nope, still there. So...I guess I'm taking a chance here. (ETA--looks like a post I replied to was deleted. So if my post ends up modified or deleted, so be it, I guess. )

Originally Posted by awfulness

if your problem is that you crave sex, you would have no problem getting it since you're a female. not being sexist, no offense intended, that's just how the gender roles in this society works.. not saying that's going to magically satisfy you. it'll probably feel empty after a while. but regardless, sex is easy for you.

No. Untrue. (And don't pull out the "No offense" card.)

Originally Posted by awfulness

if we are talking solely about sex, women can get it easily. men might not approach women who are below average in looks (as much), but in a bar or party setting if that woman does the approaching she will have a much higher chance of a one night stand than a guy who's unattractive in looks and/or personality.

No. Untrue.

Would you please stop believing you can speak for all women?

Originally Posted by awfulness

oh, and id have sex with you. like, without even knowing what you look like, just hearing youre a nympho and you crave sex, yea i'd have sex with you. and so would TONS of guys. because that's how guys are.

You do realize that with your claims you're making all MEN look bad, right? "Women don't even have to try to get sex, guys will be all over ANYTHING!" is pretty much what you're claiming.

And I'm sure there are many guys who would disagree with you, such as those who go for looks. Take a look around, there are plenty guys around here who would never go for a woman without good looks.

I really hope I'm not going to end up banned for getting into this YET AGAIN, and for probably getting some innocent guy's thread locked. But it's so frustrating. You are not a woman. You can speak for yourself, but you cannot speak for all women. You've had women who were able to directly contradict you from experience yet you still claim these things; why? I don't presume to speak for YOU. You're not in my shoes; what makes you think you can speak for me?

[madisonjane]

Find another hobby. Obsession with sex will destroy you.

[awfulness]

Originally Posted by tehuti88

Whoa! When I tried to post this it told me I didn't have permission so I figured the thread was deleted or something. Nope, still there. So...I guess I'm taking a chance here. (ETA--looks like a post I replied to was deleted. So if my post ends up modified or deleted, so be it, I guess. )



No. Untrue. (And don't pull out the "No offense" card.)



No. Untrue.

Would you please stop believing you can speak for all women?




You do realize that with your claims you're making all MEN look bad, right? "Women don't even have to try to get sex, guys will be all over ANYTHING!" is pretty much what you're claiming.

And I'm sure there are many guys who would disagree with you, such as those who go for looks. Take a look around, there are plenty guys around here who would never go for a woman without good looks.

I really hope I'm not going to end up banned for getting into this YET AGAIN, and for probably getting some innocent guy's thread locked. But it's so frustrating. You are not a woman. You can speak for yourself, but you cannot speak for all women. You've had women who were able to directly contradict you from experience yet you still claim these things; why? I don't presume to speak for YOU. You're not in my shoes; what makes you think you can speak for me?

i got a pm from a mod giving me a warning for possibly starting a gender war or whatever.

listen. i don't want to debate or argue, i just want to clear this up. i'm not speaking for all men. of course there are lots of men who will not have sex with certain women. Me included. of course a woman who's not that good looking won't be easily having sex with a guy who looks and acts like brad pitt. i totally understand that and it's not what i was saying.

here, ill give an example. i, a straight male, decided to post an ad on the gay casual encounter section in craigslist. all i posted was a very blurry washed out picture of my body and genitals. i posted in the ad that i was insecure and didn't want to post my face, and to only respond to my ad if they don't care what i look like. A handful of men responded, with their phone number and pictures of their face(and genitals), saying that they want me to come over on the spot to have sex with them. some of them were gross, some of them were at least above average.

a good amount of men, but not all men, are horndogs who will have sex with anything that's even remotely attractive. I guarantee you. post an ad on craigslist as a woman, and you will have a swarm of men, some at least decent looking, who are willing to have sex with you. no matter WHAT you look like.

now, are these the types of men that you'll date or even want to be friends with? no, theyre probably gross and sleazy and won't respect you or treat you well.

so i really really don't mean any offense and don't want to spark further debate. i just want to share what ive just been through, that kind of shocked me as well. like, did a bunch of guys seriously want to have sex with me just from a blurry picture?

and as a man, i will be very hard pressed to find a way to get sex with women as easily as i can get sex with gay men.

edit: and to reiterate.. i am NOT saying women have an easier life than men. im really scared you'll misunderstand me .