Social Anxiety Support

Lilith40 · 11-16-2008, 08:03 AM

I'm sure some of you already know that I sometimes mention that I have facial tics from time to time. I'm fine with having them now. It's just learning how to deal with the ignorant. As in people who won't believe that I'm not trying to start anything despite what my face looks like at the moment. Shoot, my face is straight most of the time.

Generally speaking a lot of people with social anxiety would like to practice saying something when they feel like they should say something. However each time I do try to correct somebody by asking if they do have a problem with my facial tics, why are they talking about me, or at least try to show that I'm not trying to start anything. I get called "weak", a "punk", or a "p*ssy" or pretend to be innocent and act like they have no idea what I'm talking about!

It's a common believe that when someone tics, they have something to say. Well that's not all the time to me. That happens rarely. These people who are against me determined to get me to talk as they don't believe I have a facial problem. These are the outgoing people who like to be in people's faces. I'm not like them, I just try to resolve a conflict and be on my way instead of wasting my time joking on everyone.

I'm just tired of all this since I have tried but according to a lot of people, they feel that what I've done wasn't a try at all and it sickens me. I know that my next step is to just ignore them. It does feel good at times but with my reputation as the school "punk" due to my facial tics, I'm not sure what to do.

Since one of the annoying people is in my class and listens to everything that I do. I'm going to talk to my friend and just say that I find those people sad and they should find something else to do. Knowing the guy, he'll go off during break to go bark at his friends (I can't seem to think of him as anything other than the group's dog).

What to do?

ghostofme · 02-08-2009, 10:32 PM

I think I know how you're feeling. I had really bad allergies in my eyes a couple of years ago that made them really red and like I was always staring at people. My friends thought that my eyes looked dead and many people thought that I was weird or gross because of them. This really made my S.A. worse and I could not speak with most people normally. I'm not a doctor so I don't really know what to do about facial tics, though it sounds like you want advice dealing with the ignorant people rather that the facial tics. You sound like a very nice person, and a quote from an essay came to mind that I hope might help you. I know that is does not completley apply to you, but it says,
"The self-loathing I feel is neither physically nor intellectually substantial. What I hate is not me but a disease.
I am not a disease."
For me SAS is my "disease" but it is not who I am. You should ignore these people at your school, because they do not know who you are, and are not worthy to know who you are as long as they hold their own distorted picture of you in their minds. Hope this helps

.

11-16-2008, 08:03 AM	#1 (permalink)
Lilith40 Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 61	Not Sure What to Do I'm sure some of you already know that I sometimes mention that I have facial tics from time to time. I'm fine with having them now. It's just learning how to deal with the ignorant. As in people who won't believe that I'm not trying to start anything despite what my face looks like at the moment. Shoot, my face is straight most of the time. Generally speaking a lot of people with social anxiety would like to practice saying something when they feel like they should say something. However each time I do try to correct somebody by asking if they do have a problem with my facial tics, why are they talking about me, or at least try to show that I'm not trying to start anything. I get called "weak", a "punk", or a "p*ssy" or pretend to be innocent and act like they have no idea what I'm talking about! It's a common believe that when someone tics, they have something to say. Well that's not all the time to me. That happens rarely. These people who are against me determined to get me to talk as they don't believe I have a facial problem. These are the outgoing people who like to be in people's faces. I'm not like them, I just try to resolve a conflict and be on my way instead of wasting my time joking on everyone. I'm just tired of all this since I have tried but according to a lot of people, they feel that what I've done wasn't a try at all and it sickens me. I know that my next step is to just ignore them. It does feel good at times but with my reputation as the school "punk" due to my facial tics, I'm not sure what to do. Since one of the annoying people is in my class and listens to everything that I do. I'm going to talk to my friend and just say that I find those people sad and they should find something else to do. Knowing the guy, he'll go off during break to go bark at his friends (I can't seem to think of him as anything other than the group's dog). What to do?

02-08-2009, 10:32 PM	#2 (permalink)
ghostofme Status: SAS Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Gender: Male Age: 17 Posts: 12	I think I know how you're feeling. I had really bad allergies in my eyes a couple of years ago that made them really red and like I was always staring at people. My friends thought that my eyes looked dead and many people thought that I was weird or gross because of them. This really made my S.A. worse and I could not speak with most people normally. I'm not a doctor so I don't really know what to do about facial tics, though it sounds like you want advice dealing with the ignorant people rather that the facial tics. You sound like a very nice person, and a quote from an essay came to mind that I hope might help you. I know that is does not completley apply to you, but it says, "The self-loathing I feel is neither physically nor intellectually substantial. What I hate is not me but a disease. I am not a disease." For me SAS is my "disease" but it is not who I am. You should ignore these people at your school, because they do not know who you are, and are not worthy to know who you are as long as they hold their own distorted picture of you in their minds. Hope this helps .