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Old 02-03-2010, 07:43 PM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Default My cousin won't talk to me...

I don't know if it's just my SAD kicking in with negative thoughts but...

What do you guys think of this?

So me and my cousin are really close (at least I still think) and he's pretty much my best friend. Well He moved away a few years ago to be with his gf. So we kept in touch through myspace. So I would talk to him atleast once or twice a week when he wasn't busy working or whatever. He even visits sometimes and we'll go hang out and do stuff. But just a couple of months ago I messaged him and he took a while to respond. (he usually responds to my messages fast) and he was like "hey man I'm sorry I couldn't get back to you faster. I've just been working a lot" and I was like thats fine ok. So this happens a few more times. He usually jokes around with me, but this time his responses have been short and not too "funny". So I'm like ok he's probably just really stressed at work. Then I made a facebook account just to try something new. He told me he had one too, so I was like "ok I'll add you on there then" so I found him on there and requested him. Well, he never accepted it. I even messaged him on myspace letting him know that I requested him, but he never messaged me back. That was the last message I ever sent him. I even asked my sisters bf if there was something wrong? he never answers my messages anymore (he's friends with my cousin too) and he said that he's just really busy with work. But him and my cousin still talk every day. So I thought if he has time to talk to my sisters bf, why can't he talk to me and let me know whats going on? My other sister just recently text him to see if he would answer and he did. He said he's coming to visit again and he invited her to go to some event. So I just recently got a cell phone and I text him "hey this is my new number blah blah blah" and he never text back. Now I know I have long distance and he should have got my text. I even text him another time just to make sure...still no response.

Now I'm wondering if I did something wrong? I can't think of anything bad I said the last time we had a conversation.

I just think it's really weird...what do you guys think?
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Old 02-03-2010, 08:24 PM   #2 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fox Kid View Post
I don't know if it's just my SAD kicking in with negative thoughts but...

What do you guys think of this?

So me and my cousin are really close (at least I still think) and he's pretty much my best friend. Well He moved away a few years ago to be with his gf. So we kept in touch through myspace. So I would talk to him atleast once or twice a week when he wasn't busy working or whatever. He even visits sometimes and we'll go hang out and do stuff. But just a couple of months ago I messaged him and he took a while to respond. (he usually responds to my messages fast) and he was like "hey man I'm sorry I couldn't get back to you faster. I've just been working a lot" and I was like thats fine ok. So this happens a few more times. He usually jokes around with me, but this time his responses have been short and not too "funny". So I'm like ok he's probably just really stressed at work. Then I made a facebook account just to try something new. He told me he had one too, so I was like "ok I'll add you on there then" so I found him on there and requested him. Well, he never accepted it. I even messaged him on myspace letting him know that I requested him, but he never messaged me back. That was the last message I ever sent him. I even asked my sisters bf if there was something wrong? he never answers my messages anymore (he's friends with my cousin too) and he said that he's just really busy with work. But him and my cousin still talk every day. So I thought if he has time to talk to my sisters bf, why can't he talk to me and let me know whats going on? My other sister just recently text him to see if he would answer and he did. He said he's coming to visit again and he invited her to go to some event. So I just recently got a cell phone and I text him "hey this is my new number blah blah blah" and he never text back. Now I know I have long distance and he should have got my text. I even text him another time just to make sure...still no response.

Now I'm wondering if I did something wrong? I can't think of anything bad I said the last time we had a conversation.

I just think it's really weird...what do you guys think?
It maybe nothing, sounds like he is ignoring you though. I would just give it some time dont text or email him anymore. Dont think of it as there's something wrong with you it sounds like there's something wrong with him.
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Old 04-04-2013, 04:15 PM   #3 (permalink)
 
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Fox Kid, please don't think that you did anything wrong. I had a similar situation with my cousin. He used to be very nice and friendly, and he would e-mail me from time to time. After a while, he stopped answering my e-mails. Initially, he told me that he was just really busy with school. Then one day, he responded to an e-mail by telling me that his life and his family were none of my business. That was my first hint that there was something wrong with him, not me. Later I learned that he is bipolar. Needless to say, I have not been in contact with my cousin since then. It's sad, but I am much happier now than I was before when I kept thinking I was doing something wrong. It's not you, Fox Kid. It's your cousin.
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Old 04-04-2013, 04:21 PM   #4 (permalink)
 
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Who knows why he isn't responding to you. But if he's causing you this much anxiety (or stress, I guess would be the better word), then maybe he isn't worth your time. I'm sorry this is happening to you
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Old 04-04-2013, 04:32 PM   #5 (permalink)
 
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Put yourself in his shoes. Are you being clingy?

-If so, learn to space out a relationship. Don't spend all your time trying to be with just one person (cause he ain't yer spouse!).

-If not, maybe he is busy or has a problem like 'cousinproblems' said. Although having a creepily suspicious name, 'cousinproblems' is right.

If you want you can find out his problem or if he is busy. That's kinda nosy in my opinion. Better to text him, "do you need some space?"

-If he says "yes", you can stop wasting effort.
-If he ignores you, you can assume that means "yes".
-If he says "no", you can come across as a considerate person who cares about others.
Either way you win.
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