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Material possessions

1K views 22 replies 19 participants last post by  VirtualNinja 
#1 ·
Anyone else put most of their time and love in material possessions? Since I lack a social life/love life/family. It feels wrong since growing up your supposed to value the people in your life.
 
#2 ·
Yeah relationships are more important. But yeah I do find myself choosing material things over actually doing things with humans most of the time....its the curse of SA.
 
#3 ·
I would say sometimes yes. I grew up poor so now that I'm in adult and I can afford things I really enjoy buying stuff. I notice it makes me happy for a little bit but it goes away pretty quick .
 
#4 ·
I'm a minimalist by choice. The less i have, the better i feel.

You wouldn't be too impressed with my room. Basically a desk, mattress and a computer. That suits me fine though since i like the space. And If i have to move, i'm ready to go in under 30 minutes.
 
#6 ·
I have a few things I'm very attached to and put a lot of effort into maintaining. Other things, like clothing, I don't care about at all.

Actually, come to think of it, I have a souvenir from a trip I took about sixteen or seventeen years ago. It's a piece of batik cloth. I'm not sure why I still carry it around with me instead of donating it or putting it in a storage bin somewhere. So I definitely do get attached to things, even if they don't really serve a useful purpose.
 
#7 ·
Not really, no.

I've never really been big on owning stuff :)

Or as my mom put it: "Student life will fit you so well, as you're used to getting along with so little"

To me, items are only as good as they are in use. And they are obtained for that only - to be used.

However, I usually take quite good care of my belongings, because that way I have to spend less money on getting new stuff.
 
#10 ·
I'm trying to get rid of things and get away from finding comfort in having so much stuff. I'm tired of the responsibility of taking care of and storing all of it. Before I used to equate having a big house filled with stuff to being prosperous. Now, it makes me feel tied down and anxious.
 
#11 ·
I have too much stuff. It is good stuff and most of it serves a purpose, but I have traveled enough and lived out of a backpack with only what I really need and I know my life is different and I have less to worry about doing. I either have to clean up the stuff or put it away when I am at home.
 
#12 ·
Give your own personal interests/desires priority over what you "should" value. Yes, valuing people in your life can be important, but as long as you can't own up to what you value the most in this moment, you will feel broken and lack trust with yourself. If you get more value out of material possessions, then own up to it. You do not need to change and value people or relationships just because that is what you are "supposed" to value. You have your reasons for not enjoying the presence of other people so accept that you prefer material possessions more at this time while to continue on your journey towards self love/acceptance.

As you continue, you may one day realize that people feel more valuable to you than material things, but don't try and put the carriage in front of the horse. When that time comes, you will naturally value human interaction. You are not "broken" because you value material possessions over human relationships. Please understand this.
 
#15 ·
Well said. I've noticed that a lot of people who were sheltered as children seem to rely more on material things to keep them mentally stable. While some are prone to addiction, a strong indication that these behaviors aren't unhealthy is when they don't let these material things interfere with basic human needs. You could play 8 hours of video games a day, and I wouldn't care as long as you spent the remaining time doing something productive or working. If you're still able to make enough money to survive and pay the bills, while spending hours playing around with your material possessions, then own it. Where I draw the line between hobbies and addictions is when the hobby is taking away money from basic necessities and being unable to pay the bills. Once that happens, you really need to get help.
 
#14 ·
I wouldn't classify myself as a hoarder, but I do own a lot of things: enough video games to open up my own arcade, music equipment (mostly guitar stuff because I don't see the need for tons of violin accessories), shoes. I used to collect so much books as a kid too. And if I don't control myself, CDs, cassettes, and vinyl will probably overflow my shelves. I don't consider this unhealthy when all of these were accumulated within a large time span. Most of these items I've had since I was a kid, and the ones I didn't need, I had no problems getting rid of. A lot of them were also handed down to me from my two older siblings and friends.

I'm much less of a messy hoarder than my sister though. She has clothes blocking the floor of her room, and continues to buy more. I'd be lying if I said I never feel like dressing up, but most days, I'm okay with just a v-neck tee, jeans, and boots. I love fashion, but strangely I don't like shopping for clothes. Trying stuff on is irritating when I just want to get what I need in 10 minutes and be out of the store right away.
 
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#18 ·
I'm definitely a materialist and more stuff=better. My room is messy and full of stuff. I have more furniture what I need and some of them are piled over each other, because there just isn't more room... I live in this "creative chaos" I like all the details and visuals of having a room full of stuff that I like. It also brings certain kind of safety for me. I get anxious in tidy and bright places and that is also very uninspiring for me.

The cars... most valuable things in my life, in every sense. I always felt that they are the substitute of relationships for me. I'm not trying to be a sexist, but you know how women are sometimes disgracefully referred to as cars or other way around... But these cars, you see pictures of them, you see them in movies, these old cars have been there long before I was born, they're like celebrities you can have around.

I don't need to fear my cars, their judging, or them leaving me. As long as I can take care of those cars and don't "chop" them, I'm enough for them. I just wish it would work like that with women.

Without my material possessions I have nothing, so I damn right "put most of my time and love in material possessions"
 
#20 ·
I'm definitely a materialist and more stuff=better. My room is messy and full of stuff. I have more furniture what I need and some of them are piled over each other, because there just isn't more room... I live in this "creative chaos" I like all the details and visuals of having a room full of stuff that I like. It also brings certain kind of safety for me. I get anxious in tidy and bright places and that is also very uninspiring for me.

The cars... most valuable things in my life, in every sense. I always felt that they are the substitute of relationships for me. I'm not trying to be a sexist, but you know how women are sometimes disgracefully referred to as cars or other way around... But these cars, you see pictures of them, you see them in movies, these old cars have been there long before I was born, they're like celebrities you can have around.

I don't need to fear my cars, their judging, or them leaving me. As long as I can take care of those cars and don't "chop" them, I'm enough for them. I just wish it would work like that with women.

Without my material possessions I have nothing, so I damn right "put most of my time and love in material possessions"
I could of wrote all of that. My room is a mess and doesn't really bother me I feel comfortable with all the useless junk. My cars are definitely important and super clean ironically. Being materialistic is wrong but what else do you do if your all alone in the world. I get more excited around cars then women at this point. Im gonna end up a socially awkward middle aged bachelor that drives a Corvette. Without the responsibility of family it's like you can just buy what makes you happy and not feel guilty.
 
#19 ·
Not really attached to material possessions ( still very angry if something broke), but used to buy stuff because it would be cool to try it out, then leave it abandoned on a shelve for months, and not sold to a pawn shop due to anxiety. Quite of a messy hoarder...

Now, I become indifferent to have more material possessions. I just try conditioning myself to believe there is an imaginary friend in my room, playing with augmented reality apps to cope with loneliness.
 
#21 ·
Ehh. Most of the stuff I own (have owned) is junk. I tend to keep stuff for sentimental reasons and go crazy every now and then and just throw all kinds of crap away. I get tired of looking at junk eventually and get rid of it. My methodology is this. If I'm tired of dealing with something that's in my living space but I'm not sure if I want to keep it, I put it out in the garage for a couple of months. If I don't miss it, I throw it away. If I miss it, I keep it. Obviously, if I don't miss it I don't need it. This is outside of necessities like tools and ladders and stuff like that. I generally never throw tools away. Really goes for anything that's actually valuable. Obviously if I have something that's worth a lot I wouldn't toss it in the trash but I don't have much that meets that description.

I tend to have hoarding issues if I hesitate to throw stuff away. I tend to think everything is going to be useful someday. I don't have room for that mentality so I just toss stuff.
 
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