Social Anxiety Support

ch3cooh · 11-03-2009, 08:25 PM

I find that even the people that have gotten close to me and that I feel safe around I still have the instinct to keep them away. For instance last Thursday I was out to dinner with my coach and as we were leaving I said, "I'll see you saturday."

Confused, he asked, "Where are you going to be tomorrow?"

The truth was I had a volunteer event with the SPCA, a fairly honorable thing to do. But before I could answer that voice in my head that seems to represent my SA screamed at me "DON'T SAY"

"I um uhhh have a uhhh thing that I kinda um have to uhh go to." I stammered out.

This kind of stuff happens all the time, everyone stays away where they can't do any damage. When I got my dog someone invited me to lunch and I had to decline to go to OKC to pick up my dog. When they asked what I had going on, it was another stammer stutter fest. i couldn't even admit that I was adopting a dog from a rescue group.

I guess part of it is finding the self-confidence to own the good things that I do, and also understand that the 3 or 4 friends I do have accept me as I am and won't ridicule me for these things.

**** this is hard, it sabotages my relationships with people.

matty · 11-03-2009, 08:56 PM

You do need to own the good things because they are good. They are honerable things and you should express that you are proud of it. Like you are.
No one will think anything wrong with you let alone your friends for volunteering or adobting a dog.
Easier said then done I know.

I adobted a dog, it was 6, over weight and very neglected and rough. Ended up being an amazing dog.

11-03-2009, 08:25 PM	#1 (permalink)
ch3cooh Status: SAS Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Oklahoma...OK! Gender: Male Posts: 53	Keeping people away I find that even the people that have gotten close to me and that I feel safe around I still have the instinct to keep them away. For instance last Thursday I was out to dinner with my coach and as we were leaving I said, "I'll see you saturday." Confused, he asked, "Where are you going to be tomorrow?" The truth was I had a volunteer event with the SPCA, a fairly honorable thing to do. But before I could answer that voice in my head that seems to represent my SA screamed at me "DON'T SAY" "I um uhhh have a uhhh thing that I kinda um have to uhh go to." I stammered out. This kind of stuff happens all the time, everyone stays away where they can't do any damage. When I got my dog someone invited me to lunch and I had to decline to go to OKC to pick up my dog. When they asked what I had going on, it was another stammer stutter fest. i couldn't even admit that I was adopting a dog from a rescue group. I guess part of it is finding the self-confidence to own the good things that I do, and also understand that the 3 or 4 friends I do have accept me as I am and won't ridicule me for these things. **** this is hard, it sabotages my relationships with people.

11-03-2009, 08:56 PM	#2 (permalink)
matty Status: Falling Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Brisbane Gender: Male Age: 24 Posts: 202	You do need to own the good things because they are good. They are honerable things and you should express that you are proud of it. Like you are. No one will think anything wrong with you let alone your friends for volunteering or adobting a dog. Easier said then done I know. I adobted a dog, it was 6, over weight and very neglected and rough. Ended up being an amazing dog.