I was overprotected and now I can't function as an adult
Here's my situation in a nutshell: I'm 30 years old, an only child and I have been protected all my life, even up to now. All my early memories involve me being ridiculously shy and scared (I now realize I probably suffered from Selective Mutism). In 3rd grade, I was "analyzed" unknowingly while I played and a therapist observed me. The observation didn't benefit me and treatment was never pursued. I grew up, each grade becoming more difficult socially and academically. My dad doesn't believe mental issues exist so up to now he doesn't see anything "wrong" with me. He's a total hermit so he doesn't see it as an issue. My mom only let me socialize with cousins under her supervision. On the rare occasions that I hung out with actual friends, I was never allowed to stay overnight, even when I was 18. I never spoke for myself (even now, my dad will order for me at restaurants unless I speak up first).
I had my first job at a fast food restaurant when I was 22 and it was too much to handle, I didn't stay more than 3 months. Then I got a job working as an office assistant but the phones gave me so much anxiety, I couldn't do my job well and was relieved when my boss said she no longer needed me (it was a mutual agreement). Once I got to college, at 18, I suffered academically and couldn't find any interest and motivation. I moved to the dorms but got incredibly homesick and long story short, I am still living at home, STILL trying to finish my degree (10 years later) online and my only social interaction every day are my parents, who never go anywhere and are complete hermits. I work in a shop seasonally for Christmas for 2 months out of the year. I literally feel like I'm sinking into a deep hole. I can't see a way out. I tell my mom how much I am suffering but she doesn't seem to understand and just thinks that I need to put myself out there more. Yeah, if it was that easy, I would do it. Also, I am too anxious to drive so I feel embarrassed that if I make new friends, I can't drive places to meet up with them and I don't want to have to get a ride from my parents all the time. Public transportation is almost nonexistent and I live in a tiny town where no one is my age. I know I have to do something because literally all my 20s were spent in college and I only hung out with people less than 10 times in those 10 years. I am just waiting to graduate (assuming I am successful this time around) and will leap into job hunting but I don't want to find a part-time job until then because with my lack of motivation and extreme anxiety, I don't want to risk failing again. My mom thinks a college education will instill instant confidence but it definitely doesn't work that way and I can't make her realize that.
I know no one can help me but myself. I just want to know I'm not alone because I feel so helpless and hopeless. I know it's not right of me to blame my parents (they only wanted to love and protect me) but it really really affected me that they never encouraged me to be independent or social.
Thank you so much for reading this.