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Old 08-06-2011, 03:28 AM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Default How to stop blushing?

I have a tutorial group and the tutor stares really directly into my eyes and I blush immediately- how do I make it stop?
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Old 08-06-2011, 05:40 AM   #2 (permalink)
 
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14 views and no answer....
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Old 08-06-2011, 05:58 AM   #3 (permalink)
 
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Hi

I don't really have an answer for you on how to make it stop. When I blush, it comes on so suddenly that there is no stopping it. how are you treating your sa right now?

I did look around a little on the internet and found this article
http://www.self-confidence.co.uk/art...ting-blushing/

hope it helps!
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Old 08-06-2011, 06:09 AM   #4 (permalink)
 
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The worry and fear about blushing sets us up to blush more often. It is the fear of blushing, and how we think others view it, that "convinces" us that blushing is a dreadful thing. However, the act of blushing itself is not an "automatic negative thought" or ANT.
If you blush, then that is just an unfortunate fact of life right now.
By definition, an automatic negative thought (ANT) is irrational, and it is always wrong. You are right: If you feel that everyone notices you blush, is judgmental about it, and thinks less of you because of it, these are automatic negative thoughts.

People who are not blushers do not feel that blushing is terrible, awful, or embarrassing. Most often, they don't even notice it. If they do notice it, it is because you pay attention to it, point it out, make a comment about it, or look embarrassed, humiliated, and defeated by it

Conversely, if you continue right on with what you are doing or saying when you blush and, if you put no effort into concentrating on the symptoms, others will not usually even notice it. Even if they do, you will have learned not to care.

First, cognitive therapy for social anxiety directly address all the "germs", catalysts, or triggers involved in the cycle of blushing maintenance. Since blushing is maintained by our anxiety, in cognitive therapy we learn to think, believe, and feel differently than we have in the past about our anxiety.

Sometimes people want "blushing only" therapy. We learned very quickly that this does not work, because the root cause of blushing is social anxiety. For blushing to be eradicated, then social anxiety must be eradicated, too. Cognitive therapy to overcome social anxiety and its symptoms, whether it be blushing, excessive sweating, hands that shake, or neck twitching, is always necessary.

So, adopting a "so what, who cares" attitude and taking the pressure off yourself is the best solution. This is very hard to do on your own, and happens much more frequently in the context of an active, structured social anxiety therapy group

Overcoming social anxiety (and blushing) is a paradox. It is only when we learn to stop fighting, struggling and trying to force the anxiety away that we can start to recover from social anxiety. This requires persistence, patience and a willingness to be kind to yourself.
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Old 08-06-2011, 10:35 AM   #5 (permalink)
 
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I don't know if it's directly related to social anxiety. I know some pretty social people who blush sometimes too. In fact that happened today, and her friend made a treasing remark and said something like "and don't get all red because you're wrong".
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Old 08-06-2011, 10:39 AM   #6 (permalink)
 
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blushing is cute.
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Old 08-06-2011, 12:58 PM   #7 (permalink)
 
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Originally Posted by tigerblood View Post
I don't know if it's directly related to social anxiety. I know some pretty social people who blush sometimes too. In fact that happened today, and her friend made a treasing remark and said something like "and don't get all red because you're wrong".
duhh people blush

what are they, robots ? we all have the ability to blush

but the reason number 1, why so many people blush constanlty even by absurd things, is because of social anxiety

there is nothing wrong in blushing 1 in a million, it happens and it has happened to every human on earth lmao every human on earth has blushed at least one time in their lifetimes.

it only becomes a problem, when you blush constantly, due to having a fear of blushing, this is social anxiety
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Old 08-06-2011, 01:31 PM   #8 (permalink)
 
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I always used to blush at people when they looked at me, especially if they were close-by. I found it ever-so-annoying because most of the time I wasn't interested in them romantically, but they took it as such.

As for how to fix it, I don't know. For me, the problem went away as I got older. Probably I just got better at suppressing it.
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Old 08-06-2011, 03:23 PM   #9 (permalink)
 
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Originally Posted by coketo158 View Post
duhh people blush

what are they, robots ? we all have the ability to blush

but the reason number 1, why so many people blush constanlty even by absurd things, is because of social anxiety

there is nothing wrong in blushing 1 in a million, it happens and it has happened to every human on earth lmao every human on earth has blushed at least one time in their lifetimes.

it only becomes a problem, when you blush constantly, due to having a fear of blushing, this is social anxiety
Uh, duh I know that, i'm not a simpleton dude. I'm just saying I know plenty of people who regularly blush even though they don't have SA at all. It's GENETIC as well, not just sa. Hell I've met people who are already pretty red in the face naturally, and when they do blush they become tomatos. But they don't have social anxiety.
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Old 08-06-2011, 08:21 PM   #10 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
I have a tutorial group and the tutor stares really directly into my eyes and I blush immediately- how do I make it stop?
First, I would suggest to ignore your tutor.. ignore him in a way as to not see him as an authority figure... that is. He is just an average tutor. There are many of those all over.

Second, do NOT make direct eye contact with him at all... never. Don't look him in the eyes but rather his forehead. And that is just if you have to look at him.

In my opinion, blushing is either a genetic skin problem or a sing of submission.

Regarding the former, there are cases where people's skin gets irritated really easy next to a CFL light bulb or a incandescent light bulb.... or even to the suns rays.

Regarding the latter, getting red faced is just a way to show being submissive. But that does not mean that you should blame yourself.

I know it is hard not to get red faced, specially when the situation has been going on for a while, but it can be stopped... not easy, but it can. Good luck.
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Old 08-06-2011, 11:41 PM   #11 (permalink)
 
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Originally Posted by tigerblood View Post
Uh, duh I know that, i'm not a simpleton dude. I'm just saying I know plenty of people who regularly blush even though they don't have SA at all. It's GENETIC as well, not just sa. Hell I've met people who are already pretty red in the face naturally, and when they do blush they become tomatos. But they don't have social anxiety.
how do you even know they dont have social anxiety ? just because they look "fine" or that they are are able to socialize better than you do, or maybe appear more outgoing than you are, doesnt mean they could not have social anxiety, what makes you so sure that they could not have SA ? Heck, even them could not even know they have it. Millions of people suffer from this problem without even knowing what is disrupting their lives. Yeah some people's face are red, some people have rosacea, if they blush it more obvious

So if blushing is also due to genetics and people without social anxiety disorder, can blush constantly, then why complain about it ? just accept it, since is due to genetics, there is nothing you can do to get rid of it. What you dont realize is that even if that person that blushes constantly due to genettics (doesn't suffer from social anxiety), he or she, sooner or later, will develop social anxiety due to the blushing, why ? because he will notice it on his body and mirrors, the more he notices it, the more fear of blushing he will develop, people will point it out (it happens, most people dont do it, but only one time is needed for social anxiety to begin building up), lots of people are rude and have no compassion, and will make fun of you for blushing to make themselves feel better, which in turn, in time, will develop social anxiety in a person (genetic blusher) who didnt have social anxiety

so you see, one way or the other, it all comes down to social anxiety anyways
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Old 08-07-2011, 12:30 AM   #12 (permalink)
 
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Blushing ruined my childhood. Made it impossible for me to talk in public without turning beet red. I mean so red that the whole class turns around and laughs. That's bad. That's what cements your fear of blushing. I've gotten a modicium of control over it since I've gotten older, but I'd love to find a way to conquer it completely. Maye I will finally try some of this cognitive therapy.
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Old 08-07-2011, 02:00 AM   #13 (permalink)
 
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Originally Posted by syrella View Post
I always used to blush at people when they looked at me, especially if they were close-by. I found it ever-so-annoying because most of the time I wasn't interested in them romantically, but they took it as such.
.
This is exactly my problem. They think they're such hot **** and if I had the courage to say "*****, please" I would.
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Old 08-07-2011, 01:53 PM   #14 (permalink)
 
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I blush very easily. There is a surgical procedure that can be done to prevent blushing, but I would't go so far as having it done. For me when I blush in front of people, I would immediately not make eye contact because I was so embarassed. But now, when I blush, I just ride it through. There is no way of stopping it. I used to tell myself that I hate myself for blushing, but now I tell myslef that there is nothing I can do about it, so I just ride it out. This has actually helped me; trying to think positive when you are blushing is very reinforcing.
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Old 08-07-2011, 02:06 PM   #15 (permalink)
 
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I blush very easily. There is a surgical procedure that can be done to prevent blushing, but I would't go so far as having it done. For me when I blush in front of people, I would immediately not make eye contact because I was so embarassed. But now, when I blush, I just ride it through. There is no way of stopping it. I used to tell myself that I hate myself for blushing, but now I tell myslef that there is nothing I can do about it, so I just ride it out. This has actually helped me; trying to think positive when you are blushing is very reinforcing.
ETS endoscopic transthoracic sympathectomy

and it has side effects, lots of them, lots of people on forums, claim that it ruined their lives, and it didnt get rid of blushing completely.

Best way is to do that, to learn not to care. I stil blush sometimes, but is a lot less than before .. also remeber that if your blushing is caused by social anxiety (not genetics or cause by rosacea) then it will diminish as the years go by, this is why is extremely rare to see an old person blushing at all, it almost never happens

The best medication for blushing, are betablockers such as propranolol, but they should be taken only for specific situations such as a date, or giving a public presentation .. because if you take it everyday, you will develop tolerance ... you wont get the same effect. I take propranolo for those situations and is a blessing. It definetly helps.
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Old 08-08-2011, 08:10 AM   #16 (permalink)
 
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how do you even know they dont have social anxiety ? just because they look "fine" or that they are are able to socialize better than you do, or maybe appear more outgoing than you are, doesnt mean they could not have social anxiety, what makes you so sure that they could not have SA ? Heck, even them could not even know they have it. Millions of people suffer from this problem without even knowing what is disrupting their lives. Yeah some people's face are red, some people have rosacea, if they blush it more obvious

So if blushing is also due to genetics and people without social anxiety disorder, can blush constantly, then why complain about it ? just accept it, since is due to genetics, there is nothing you can do to get rid of it. What you dont realize is that even if that person that blushes constantly due to genettics (doesn't suffer from social anxiety), he or she, sooner or later, will develop social anxiety due to the blushing, why ? because he will notice it on his body and mirrors, the more he notices it, the more fear of blushing he will develop, people will point it out (it happens, most people dont do it, but only one time is needed for social anxiety to begin building up), lots of people are rude and have no compassion, and will make fun of you for blushing to make themselves feel better, which in turn, in time, will develop social anxiety in a person (genetic blusher) who didnt have social anxiety

so you see, one way or the other, it all comes down to social anxiety anyways

Do you even know what social anxiety disorder is? It's a DISORDER, meaning it's only the same thing as what we have if it hinders you in any way.

Yes, I know for a fact that these people who blush do not have SA or anything close to it. They have zero trouble communicating with people at any time, it doesn't stop them from making friends, going out, even having a job where they are somewhat of an authoritative figure etc, etc. SA is a DISORDER, you don't have it if you have a nervous moment sometimes and then you blush or because of an embarassing moment. You can keep speculating but it only makes you look like you're grasping for straws.

And why not complain if it's genetic? What, are you gonna tell us what to do? We'll complain about any damn thing we want. I don't think I'll ever overcome blushing but It's called venting, you should try it sometime because it's better than locking up your frustrations inside.

You're completely wrong.
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Old 08-08-2011, 08:14 AM   #17 (permalink)
 
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im black so i dont really have that problem lol. Maybe you should try thinking of somthing that turns you off. Or somthing thats servearly discusting
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Old 08-08-2011, 09:31 AM   #18 (permalink)
 
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Do you even know what social anxiety disorder is? It's a DISORDER, meaning it's only the same thing as what we have if it hinders you in any way.

Yes, I know for a fact that these people who blush do not have SA or anything close to it. They have zero trouble communicating with people at any time, it doesn't stop them from making friends, going out, even having a job where they are somewhat of an authoritative figure etc, etc. SA is a DISORDER, you don't have it if you have a nervous moment sometimes and then you blush or because of an embarassing moment. You can keep speculating but it only makes you look like you're grasping for straws.

And why not complain if it's genetic? What, are you gonna tell us what to do? We'll complain about any damn thing we want. I don't think I'll ever overcome blushing but It's called venting, you should try it sometime because it's better than locking up your frustrations inside.

You're completely wrong.
lol is your blushing due to social anxiety or genetics/race ?

fact of the matter is everyone has the ability to develop social anxiety disorder at any moment, especially if you are a young person. Just because the genetic blushers you know, , have no social anxiety or didnt develop social anxiety due to their genetic blushing, doesn't mean other people could not develop social anxiety due to genetic blushing. How do you even know they don't have social anxiety ? So just because a person appears outgoing and is able to socialze with others better than you/do things you are not able to do, then he or se doesnt have social anxiety ? can you read their minds or feelings ?

So, what causes you social anxiety, so I can see if I qualify for social anxiety disorder ? please tell me. God, forbid that I'm capable of doing the things you are not, and thus in your eyes, will be unworthy of claiming that I suffer from social anxiety disorder.
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Old 08-08-2011, 09:36 AM   #19 (permalink)
 
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im black so i dont really have that problem lol. Maybe you should try thinking of somthing that turns you off. Or somthing thats servearly discusting
The darker a person is, the less he or she will blush, and even if they happen blush, it will be less noticeable due to their skin tone, this why makeup helps with blushing.
I have olive skintone, so when I rarely blush is not as noticeable as it is on many white people.

White people have it bad if they suffer from social anxiety/blushing, you are doomed if you are/ have:

- caucasian
- pale skin
- pink undertones, as in naturally having pink skintone
- rosacea
- social anxiety
- fear of blushing
- ability to blush easily due to genes

If you have all of these, you are pretty much doomed for life,not even makeup or tanning will help if you have all of these together. Only way to fix it is

- ETS endoscopic transthoracic sympathectomy
- suicide

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Old 08-08-2011, 11:26 AM   #20 (permalink)
 
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lol is your blushing due to social anxiety or genetics/race ?
For me both, but this isn't about me. This about your dumbass claiming that anyone who blushes has social anxiety disorder.

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fact of the matter is everyone has the ability to develop social anxiety disorder at any moment, especially if you are a young person.
I'd like to see some scientific evidence for that.

Quote:
Just because the genetic blushers you know, , have no social anxiety or didnt develop social anxiety due to their genetic blushing, doesn't mean other people could not develop social anxiety due to genetic blushing. How do you even know they don't have social anxiety ? So just because a person appears outgoing and is able to socialze with others better than you/do things you are not able to do, then he or se doesnt have social anxiety ? can you read their minds or feelings ?
No, can you? Social anxiety is all about fear of people in whichever way that may be.

"Social anxiety is anxiety (emotional discomfort, fear, apprehension, or worry) about social situations, interactions with others, and being evaluated or scrutinized by other people"

I repeat again, I know plenty of people who do not fall into ANY of these catagories, but they do blush at times when they're unexpectedly put on the spot in a way, embarassed i.e. extreme situations.

When people show zero symptoms of SA and are not hindered by it in any way, they just don't have that disorder. Do you perhaps feel more secure or better about yourself thinking these social/outgoing people have SA as well secretly? is that what this is about?

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So, what causes you social anxiety, so I can see if I qualify for social anxiety disorder ? please tell me. God, forbid that I'm capable of doing the things you are not, and thus in your eyes, will be unworthy of claiming that I suffer from social anxiety disorder.
I broke it down for you above. Also, get off this "causing" of social anxiety. It's very possible that SA itself is genetic. in fact on this site most people claim they've had it their whole life and it doesn't just come up overnight, and especially not because of blushing.
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