Social Anxiety Support

jeffma · 10-26-2008, 02:19 AM

ive had people laugh right to my face and held back from defending myself as well as i could of because i have a fear in the back of my head that they will say one of the things im really sensitive about and ill have a complete mental breakdown or something. it sorta seems people sense that im afraid that they will attack me full force so they can just peck away at me without fear of reprisal.though i wish i could say that i dont care what people say, and my self worth comes from my self, sadly i cannot. i see people posting about how they dont care if someone likes them or says horrible things to them and i dont know what thats like, i care and i cant stop caring and therein lies the problem. oh well, its fun to vent i guess, maybe i should get into the a/c business. tsh over and out.

MeltDowN · 10-26-2008, 02:39 AM

I hope you have a way to vent your anger.

pita · 10-26-2008, 06:52 AM

I've started lashing back at people and it's not as fun as it seems. However, I do think it's important to occasionally call someone out if they really hurt you. The trick is knowing which battles are worth fighting.

Hot Chocolate · 10-26-2008, 06:55 AM

Me too. I always thought that I couldn't care less and stuff but until they really go overboard, then I know it actually hurts me badly. But I try to avoid a confrontation even though my temper is really haywired at times.

imt · 10-26-2008, 04:24 PM

A simple stare keeps my predators a way. I'm passive, sure. But the "I wouldn't F**k with me If I were you" look works every time. I even get apologies sometimes. It's just something about being stern that people respect. As long as they smell fear, they will go in for a kill, I promise you that. Be sarcastic. Make them regret saying anything to you. Give them a bored look.

The possibilities of handling jerks are endless. Oh yeah, walk off and yawn right before they insult you, lol. Shame them for being the fools they are , but do it in a subtle manner. Be vague with responses. Lashing out will only feed their negativity and can lead to much more serious situations like fights and stuff.

Lastly, you don't want to be the "bad-tempered person who lashes out". You surely get clowned, even the more. You'll end up being the bad guy that can't take a joke. Only to those who play victims when you give the a taste of their own medicine though.

cocoa08 · 11-07-2008, 08:21 AM

Definitely don't store those repressed feeling away.

Call someone out in a professional manner.
Such as "It's really pathetic that you have to treat others that way in order to try to make yourself feel better or look better"

On the other hand I have a problem that mybf's friends do not talk to me or treat me as though I am a part of the group. So lashing out would cause a problem with my bf and it hurts me not to stand up for myself.

The only solution to that problem is not to hang out with my bf's friends.
He knows why and if my bf is understanding and loving he won't expect me to hang around people that cause me to feel unaccepted and hurt by that.

10-26-2008, 02:19 AM	#1 (permalink)
jeffma Status: SAS Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 25	holding back from defending yourself ive had people laugh right to my face and held back from defending myself as well as i could of because i have a fear in the back of my head that they will say one of the things im really sensitive about and ill have a complete mental breakdown or something. it sorta seems people sense that im afraid that they will attack me full force so they can just peck away at me without fear of reprisal.though i wish i could say that i dont care what people say, and my self worth comes from my self, sadly i cannot. i see people posting about how they dont care if someone likes them or says horrible things to them and i dont know what thats like, i care and i cant stop caring and therein lies the problem. oh well, its fun to vent i guess, maybe i should get into the a/c business. tsh over and out.

10-26-2008, 02:39 AM	#2 (permalink)
MeltDowN Status: Igniting Slowly Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: In a crater Posts: 35	I hope you have a way to vent your anger. __________________ Blow me away and scatter the ashes

10-26-2008, 06:55 AM	#4 (permalink)
Hot Chocolate Status: Colourful Spongy Cake! Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: S.E.A Posts: 1,121	Me too. I always thought that I couldn't care less and stuff but until they really go overboard, then I know it actually hurts me badly. But I try to avoid a confrontation even though my temper is really haywired at times. __________________ Living is easy with eyes closed Misunderstanding all you see It's getting hard to be someone But it all works out It doesn't matter much to me Let me take you down 'Cause i'm going to strawberry fields...

10-26-2008, 06:52 AM	#3 (permalink)
pita Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jan 2004 Gender: Female Posts: 2,167	I've started lashing back at people and it's not as fun as it seems. However, I do think it's important to occasionally call someone out if they really hurt you. The trick is knowing which battles are worth fighting.

10-26-2008, 04:24 PM	#5 (permalink)
imt Status: Eating Knives Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Woodlawn Cemetery Gender: Male Posts: 450	A simple stare keeps my predators a way. I'm passive, sure. But the "I wouldn't F**k with me If I were you" look works every time. I even get apologies sometimes. It's just something about being stern that people respect. As long as they smell fear, they will go in for a kill, I promise you that. Be sarcastic. Make them regret saying anything to you. Give them a bored look. The possibilities of handling jerks are endless. Oh yeah, walk off and yawn right before they insult you, lol. Shame them for being the fools they are , but do it in a subtle manner. Be vague with responses. Lashing out will only feed their negativity and can lead to much more serious situations like fights and stuff. Lastly, you don't want to be the "bad-tempered person who lashes out". You surely get clowned, even the more. You'll end up being the bad guy that can't take a joke. Only to those who play victims when you give the a taste of their own medicine though.

11-07-2008, 08:21 AM	#6 (permalink)
cocoa08 Status: SAS Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 4	Definitely don't store those repressed feeling away. Call someone out in a professional manner. Such as "It's really pathetic that you have to treat others that way in order to try to make yourself feel better or look better" On the other hand I have a problem that mybf's friends do not talk to me or treat me as though I am a part of the group. So lashing out would cause a problem with my bf and it hurts me not to stand up for myself. The only solution to that problem is not to hang out with my bf's friends. He knows why and if my bf is understanding and loving he won't expect me to hang around people that cause me to feel unaccepted and hurt by that.