Does talking to people drain you? - Social Anxiety Forum
X

Download the SAS Android App

Or switch to mobile version of the forums

X

Download the SAS iPhone App

Or switch to mobile version of the forums

Help/FAQLog InJoin SAS
Go Back   Social Anxiety Forum > Recovery > Coping With Social Anxiety

Reply
Old 03-06-2012, 01:21 PM   #1 (permalink)
 
Status: User Requested Permanent Ban
Join Date: Aug 2011
Age: 30
Posts: 3,288



Default Does talking to people drain you?

Don't know if there's a medical condition for it, but just talking and socializing to people is draining me. My coworkers and boss are chatty Cathy's and I dunno what their drinking or smoking, but they can go for hours talking to multiple groups of people. I just got home doing 2 meetings with different doctors and chiropractors for marketing purposes and I'm tired. I did the same thing yesterday, came home, and passed out on the bed for 5 hrs.

Knowing my boss, she could talk to dozens of people within a 4 hr time frame, and still be ready for more. And don't get me started on public speaking. I'm up on the podium for 15 mins, then pass out at home for 4-5 hrs.

Anyone know what the cause is?
Syndacus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-06-2012, 01:22 PM   #2 (permalink)
 
pancakepowder's Avatar
 
Status: SAS Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: maryland
Gender: Female
Age: 23
Posts: 231



Default

yes...
pancakepowder is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-06-2012, 01:32 PM   #3 (permalink)
 
LucidVision's Avatar
 
Status: SAS Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Vancouver, Canada
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Posts: 401



Default

Look up introvert.

But more specifically, you are wired differently than most people so when you try to socialize "their way", it drains you. Try interacting with people where you can freely say what's on your mind and talk about topics that interest you and you may feel yourself gaining more energy.
LucidVision is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-06-2012, 01:46 PM   #4 (permalink)
 
Status: User Requested Permanent Ban
Join Date: Aug 2011
Age: 30
Posts: 3,288



Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by LucidVision View Post
Look up introvert.

But more specifically, you are wired differently than most people so when you try to socialize "their way", it drains you. Try interacting with people where you can freely say what's on your mind and talk about topics that interest you and you may feel yourself gaining more energy.

Introvert is more of a personality than a medical condition. And the same goes for friends, I do get drained from talking to them about common interests and stuff.
Syndacus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-06-2012, 01:50 PM   #5 (permalink)
 
Status: User Requested Permanent Ban
Join Date: Aug 2011
Age: 30
Posts: 3,288



Default

Found an interesting article...

http://www.succeedsocially.com/drained
Syndacus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-06-2012, 01:55 PM   #6 (permalink)
 
SuperSaiyan's Avatar
 
Status: SAS Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: England
Age: 23
Posts: 128



Default

Yeah but because I focus on "errors" in the conversation
__________________
My Current Goals in Life:
[X] Pass Driving Theory Test
[X] Take Practical Driving Lesson
[ ] Pass Practical Driving Test

[ ] Get A Job

[X] Make A Friend

[X] Re-Enrol at University Next Year
SuperSaiyan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-06-2012, 03:40 PM   #7 (permalink)
 
Status: SAS Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: US
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,109



Default

I can relate.

It seems like society values people who like to talk a lot.
49erJT is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 01:11 PM   #8 (permalink)
 
Beelz's Avatar
 
Status: *Sigh*
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Halifax West Yorkshire
Gender: Male
Age: 20
Posts: 594



Default

yeah i feel mentally and physically drained after just a hour or 2 of conversation... it doesn't matter who it is i always leave social situations feel like a zombie...
Beelz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 01:38 PM   #9 (permalink)
 
scribe's Avatar
 
Status: SAS Member
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Los Angeles
Gender: Male
Posts: 402



Default

It's funny, I was just thinking about this the other day. Met a friend of mine at a sports bar and he brought another friend of his I didn't know. The two of those guys can talk and talk. I can keep up with conversation just fine for like the first hour, then it's like my mental energy just dissipates. I kind of drop out of the conversation and just do a lot of listening and saying "yeah" "uh-huh" "okay." Then I just feel like leaving.
scribe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 01:41 PM   #10 (permalink)
 
Status: User Requested Permanent Ban
Join Date: Aug 2011
Age: 19
Posts: 3,442



Default

Yep!
fallen18 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 01:43 PM   #11 (permalink)
 
Status: Permanently Banned
Join Date: Feb 2012
Age: 26
Posts: 545



Default

Yeah introversion is characterized by being emotionally drained after socializing. While extroverts are charged from it. I guess I lie somewhere in between with a slight leaning to introversion or extroversion depending on my mood for that day.

-------------------------------



Quote:
Originally Posted by 49erJT View Post
I can relate.

It seems like society values people who like to talk a lot.

It's an extroverted driven society. We are all expected to get along and be sociable. Sometimes when we don't have the energy or are not in the mood for it we are seen as grumpy people. I guess we should all learn to be a bit more extroverted when possible.
gentleman caller is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 01:52 PM   #12 (permalink)
 
Status: Permanently Banned
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Renton, WA
Gender: Male
Age: 19
Posts: 3,842



Default

It depends on who it is. I "talk" to a total stranger for 5 agonizing shake-filled minutes and I need a damn nap. I talk to a family member or close friend (Which I don't have anymore) and I'm usually fine unless we're angry with eachother.
Toppington is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 03:41 PM   #13 (permalink)
 
lonelywoman's Avatar
 
Status: SAS Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Europe
Gender: Female
Age: 27
Posts: 518



Default

O god yes, i can so relate to this. At one point i get so tired from talking it gets hard not to stutter. I can focus for like a half hour at maximum and than i get tired and feel the need to be all alone, with no people around me.
lonelywoman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 03:46 PM   #14 (permalink)
 
Status: SAS Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 319



Default

I only feel drained when I'm pretending. Particularly when it's mostly the other person doing the talking, talking about stuff I don't care about. When I have real conversations, though, it's the opposite effect.
Akili is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 03:51 PM   #15 (permalink)
 
Status: SAS Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Gender: Male
Age: 23
Posts: 4,836



Default

I only like to socialize with one person, maybe two if I'm up for it, at the very most 3 or 4. If there are anymore people in the surrounding area, I get irritated, sad, and I want to leave.
CrimsonTrigger is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 03:55 PM   #16 (permalink)
 
Status: User Requested Permanent Ban
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Navigating a sea of emotions
Gender: Female
Posts: 19,439



Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by pancakepowder View Post
yes...
Neptunus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 04:03 PM   #17 (permalink)
 
DeeperUnderstanding's Avatar
 
Status: Me.Now.ToString()
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Ohio, USA
Gender: Male
Posts: 18,344



Default

Yes, it's called introversion.
__________________
"Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." - Mahatma Gandhi
DeeperUnderstanding is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 04:50 PM   #18 (permalink)
 
stranger17's Avatar
 
Status: Galactic Pot Healer
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Florida
Gender: Male
Age: 27
Posts: 95



Default

Yeah, and eventually I just get bored of talking about their football injury or the way their socks didn't dry all the way. God, people are soooo boring.
__________________
"It is no measure of good health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society." - Jiddu Krishnamuerti
stranger17 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 05:05 PM   #19 (permalink)
 
Status: User Requested Permanent Ban
Join Date: Aug 2011
Age: 30
Posts: 3,288



Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by lonelywoman View Post
O god yes, i can so relate to this. At one point i get so tired from talking it gets hard not to stutter. I can focus for like a half hour at maximum and than i get tired and feel the need to be all alone, with no people around me.

I start out good, and then I slowly start stuttering and sounded retarded...By the end of the day I feel like I need a nap.

I guess I've gotten better if some people get tired after half an hour of talking. Since I'm talking to different people about 15-30 mins per person...
Syndacus is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2012, 05:18 PM   #20 (permalink)
 
Gordom's Avatar
 
Status: SAS Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: NC, USA
Gender: Male
Posts: 508



Default

I'm introverted when it comes to talking to certain types of people.

Here's what's draining: Talking to loud, overbearing people who insist that every conversation move at a fast, distracted pace and continuously jump around (with no rewind button). These people often don't give the quieter, more thoughtful people ("thoughtful" both in terms of having good manners by allowing the quieter people opportunities to speak and content having a little depth of thought) is draining and aggravating. It's as if there's a "whew...glad that ordeal is over" sigh of relief when the conversation with those types of people is finally concluded.

Talking to quieter and more thoughtful people who respect others' pace of conversation and give everyone a chance to talk can be quite enjoyable, at least at certain times. And quite often the quiet people are saying more interesting and witty things than the loud yippers.
Gordom is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Everyday I am going down the drain 00fly00 Frustration 1 02-15-2012 02:25 AM
I choose to see my life go down the drain?! dutchguy Coping With Social Anxiety 28 07-21-2011 08:33 PM
Drain You Speratus Just For Fun 3 04-19-2009 06:46 PM
Drain Commissioner copper Society & Culture 7 06-28-2008 06:13 AM
people drain me out AskJeeves Coping With Social Anxiety 17 02-16-2007 08:38 PM

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:05 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® ©2000-2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
SEO by vBSEO 3.6.0 ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.