Do you ever feel like everyone is looking at you and judging you? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 11:07 AM Thread Starter
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Do you ever feel like everyone is looking at you and judging you?

Whenever i go to the store, or even walking around in school, i always feel like everyone is looking at me. I also send to speak really quietly when i'm at a public place with someone because i don't want anyone to hear our conversation. This usually results in them saying "What?" or leaning in close with their ear toward me.

sometimes when someone passes me, i swear i can see them turn their head and look at me as they pass by. I don't know if it's just an illusion or not.
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post #2 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 11:14 AM
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*ring* *ring* *ring*

Agent Mallone ? Yeah, we've got a problem here.

Subject 302535, A.K.A. "thegeekinthepink", knows that we've been following him.

I repeat, subject 302535 KNOWS that he's being followed !
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post #3 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 11:52 AM
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i feel like this all the time when i'm out...probably just being paranoid but i always think people are looking at me and judging me
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post #4 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 03:27 PM
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Yes! I think I'm just a paranoid person in general though. In my mind, I usually tell myself in public: "No one is looking at you, get over it!" But I actually have made eye contact with people who were looking at me which makes me even more paranoid... what are they thinking?! What are they looking at?! Wish I knew.
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post #5 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 03:49 PM
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Yeah it's like whenever you're in public there's a spotlight on you and as irrational as it is you just can't help but feel all eyes are on you and everything's being scrutinized. You just need to try and tune it out though which gets easier with practice. Like if you're walking about in public focus on where you're going and what you're doing and pay no attention to others around you because they're not paying you any attention.

The being self-conscious about having convos in public, well don't know about that. I can't stand being on public transport and having a conversation knowing those around can listen in. I would think oh they're too wrapped up in themselves so won't be listening and judging, but then I think of all the times I overhear people's conversations and how I judge them :s Guess it doesn't matter though, who cares what strangers think? Can't be perfect in every single persons eyes.
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post #6 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 03:58 PM
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The best thing any therapist ever told me is that evryone does look and judge in their head, that's just how people are. But they forget about it in 3 seconds while we obsess about it. Her point was that it's not that people are looking, because they are, we all do, It's just that we dont take it the same way other people do. Most of the judgements people make about strangers are really about themselves, not us. The world isnt going to change for us, because we're the ones with the problem.
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post #7 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 04:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BostonB View Post
The best thing any therapist ever told me is that evryone does look and judge in their head, that's just how people are. But they forget about it in 3 seconds while we obsess about it. Her point was that it's not that people are looking, because they are, we all do, It's just that we dont take it the same way other people do. Most of the judgements people make about strangers are really about themselves, not us. The world isnt going to change for us, because we're the ones with the problem.
Very well said, we tend to obsess about things. I don't really feel that people are judging me in public, but I feel that people talk about me behind my back because I've never had a girlfriend.

...Deep in my soul, I've been so lonely
All of my hopes, fading away
I've longed for love, like everyone else does
I know I'll keep searching, even after today
So there it is girl, I've said it all now
And here we are babe, what do you say?
We've got tonight, who needs tomorrow?
We've got tonight babe
Why don't you stay?...


I have to remind myself that some birds aren't meant to be caged. Their feathers are just too bright--Morgan Freeman in Shawshank Redemption
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post #8 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 04:27 PM
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some people are judging you.... strangers "people watch" all the time. if you are a human being, you are getting judged, no way around it. best to waste time worrying more about things you can control.

Why put a new address, on the same old loneliness?
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post #9 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 05:15 PM
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I get the feeling that people look at me all the time. The bad thing is that people may think good things about me but i take it as they thinking negatively about me. I am not some celebrity so why should the general public focus on me; however even the slightest hint of observation gets my mind going.
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post #10 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 05:29 PM
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Sounds a lot like me. I won't even buy certain things when I'm at the store because I'm afraid I'll be judged or made fun of because of them. It's especially hard when I want to go into a place I don't feel like I fit in.
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post #11 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 05:45 PM
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Yeah I do feel like that a lot. That's why I spent money on some nice clothes. Now I can just say to myself that people are looking at me because they like what they see.
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post #12 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 08:18 PM
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Every second of my life. That's why I just stare at the floor now.

I know you tried to change things.
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post #13 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 08:21 PM
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I've certainly felt like everyone was staring at and silently judging me on many occasions. Lately, though, I don't seem to feel that way, probably because I've been lost in my own little world and have been ignoring most of my surroundings whenever I go out in public.
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post #14 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 08:30 PM
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Yes. Walking around my college campus was really hard for me. Going to class, I always felt people were judging me and looking at me. Also, if people happened to be staring, I imagined there was something wrong with me, and would quickly fix my blouse, or run my fingers through my hair.
Even at the store with my sister, I tell her I feel this way. Her reaction, "Oh, stop it. No one's judging you. I hate it when you say that."
Ah well.
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post #15 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 08:59 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by piscesvixen View Post
Um yeah, people look at me and talk about me among group of friends/family all the time . At the mall, subway, on the street, in their cars. I've learned to shrug it off and ignore them. It's always other women who do this too .
That's because you look like a model lol

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post #16 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 09:25 PM
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Yes! Everytime I go out I think people are talking about me. When someone looks at me I think they are judging me negatively. If someone laughs and talking quietly I think they are talking about me. Even when I'm in my room and I hear my family talking in the living room and then their voice goes low I think Oh! They are talking about me. I don't look at people in the eye when I'm out only if I have too. Everytime a guy looks at me especially a cute guy I think every time they look at me they think I'm cute orr hoping they think that.
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post #17 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 09:36 PM
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its weird I don't always feel like they're judging me but I'm an attractive girl(does not help my SA) so guys check me out often and it makes me really self conscious/uncomfortable. also its really weird but I feel like cashiers judge me by what I'm purchasing especially if its food maybe linked to my previous eating disorder
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post #18 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-07-2011, 09:37 PM
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Why Are People Are Staring At Me?

Here's an article I wrote about people staring at me:

http://socialanxietygroup.wordpress....staring-at-me/

Don't forget to breathe.
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post #19 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-08-2011, 01:01 AM
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My way of coping is to just focus externally and ignore people basically/avoid eye contact. But it's about a focus for me. I have a poor concentration and thus is sometimes difficult for me not to notice imagined/real people's reactions to me.
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post #20 of 53 (permalink) Old 08-08-2011, 01:23 AM
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I feel like people are judging me all the time.
Ive gotten to a stage that I dont even feel comfortable talking about myself to others because I am so unhappy with the lack of achievements I have done.
But I do believe that high school is the worst as people are so judgemental and if you were different in anyway you would be held to that.
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