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Old 07-27-2011, 10:09 PM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Default Being treated like a child

Do you find that others treat you like a child or as if you're stupid? Even worse, do you have a hard time defending yourself when others do this? Some people on my job really disrespect me. I've been cursed at and bossed around, but I sometimes think I deserve it.

I'm very quiet and I do think this comes across to others as acting stupid. I often feel quite intimidated by some of my co workers; I'm afraid of doing something stupid/weird and getting laughed at or worse, yelled at.
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Old 07-27-2011, 10:13 PM   #2 (permalink)
 
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Yes, i really think being quiet will make adults match you to being a child, so they treat you one. But if it's someone my own age, no.

From experience, this is true. When I was quiet, I was treated like a little child. Now that I'm a lot more socially confidence, I'm treated more of a responsible adult.
They don't even talk to me in baby speak now. How awesome? lol
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Old 07-27-2011, 10:14 PM   #3 (permalink)
 
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i personally love it. gives me the same feeling as when someone braids my hair or tells me what to do. being the youngest of five, i crave that. could be why i am 36 on a board of people who are well... not 36.
So you like being yelled at and bossed around like a child? I want to change this but sometimes I hate myself so much that I feel as if deserve to be mistreated. I feel as if everything is my fault.
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Old 07-27-2011, 10:17 PM   #4 (permalink)
 
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I was at the dentist a few weeks ago and my lady dentist kept calling me "sweetie" and being nice to me. I had to stand in front of this weird machine while a helmet thing circled my head and x-rayed my teeth. After it was done, she told me I did a "good job" standing there. Like I was a child or something. Then she said "has anyone ever told you you have nice teeth?"

I don't know if she's overly nice to everyone or if she thought I was a dummy. I didn't say more than 8 words during the entire appointment, so she probably thought I was midly retarded. But for all I know, she could be really shy too and she was just nervous. I don't know... but I do know how it feels to have people talk to you like you're a dummy.

EDIT: Most people do not yell at me or curse at me, though. Children shouldn't be treated like that and women should definitely not be treated like that. You don't have to put up with that abuse!
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Old 07-27-2011, 10:19 PM   #5 (permalink)
 
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In social settings I'm so fixated on trying not to upset others. It's tiring, and sometimes I want nothing more than to lock myself inside of my house for the rest of my life and hide.
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Old 07-27-2011, 10:20 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Do you find that others treat you like a child or as if you're stupid? Even worse, do you have a hard time defending yourself when others do this? Some people on my job really disrespect me. I've been cursed at and bossed around, but I sometimes think I deserve it.

I'm very quiet and I do think this comes across to others as acting stupid. I often feel quite intimidated by some of my co workers; I'm afraid of doing something stupid/weird and getting laughed at or worse, yelled at.
Very much. I'm intensely afraid of messing up and getting yelled at. Laughed at, wouldn't bother me. I think my fear comes from messing up and getting yelled at since I was little kid. I was slower at picking up stuff at work compared to others and I was very absent-minded/forgetful. I was yelled at by quite a few employers/my parents. When I got yelled at, that would make me screw up even more and then they would get madder at me. I used to lose/forget stuff all the time. But yelling at me didn't solve anything because I'd be so scared of getting yelled at that my mind would go blank. Maybe you got yelled at by parents/educators when you were younger?
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Old 07-28-2011, 08:08 PM   #7 (permalink)
 
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Very much. I'm intensely afraid of messing up and getting yelled at. Laughed at, wouldn't bother me. I think my fear comes from messing up and getting yelled at since I was little kid. I was slower at picking up stuff at work compared to others and I was very absent-minded/forgetful. I was yelled at by quite a few employers/my parents. When I got yelled at, that would make me screw up even more and then they would get madder at me. I used to lose/forget stuff all the time. But yelling at me didn't solve anything because I'd be so scared of getting yelled at that my mind would go blank. Maybe you got yelled at by parents/educators when you were younger?
Strangely, I don't think so. I think I've been yelled at and humiliated more as an adult.

Sometimes I wish I could just be a stay at home mom. I'd love to just hide at home and raise children.
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Old 07-29-2011, 04:26 AM   #8 (permalink)
 
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I get this at work. My name of Michael is abbreviated to "Mikey." It's said in a tone of "poor little, shy Mikey."

Working blows so hard.
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Old 07-29-2011, 05:55 AM   #9 (permalink)
 
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Originally Posted by JupiterStarr View Post
Do you find that others treat you like a child or as if you're stupid? Even worse, do you have a hard time defending yourself when others do this? Some people on my job really disrespect me. I've been cursed at and bossed around, but I sometimes think I deserve it.

I'm very quiet and I do think this comes across to others as acting stupid. I often feel quite intimidated by some of my co workers; I'm afraid of doing something stupid/weird and getting laughed at or worse, yelled at.
Yes. I think you have to get mad, get upset, do anything to show that this behavior is unacceptable. I've cried when people have treated me poorly and I don't regret it because that person never called me quiet to my face again. People are strange and will often respond better to you when they feel they need to work for your acceptance. I really think being less nice is the answer.
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Old 07-29-2011, 07:43 AM   #10 (permalink)
 
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All the time. I get treated like I'm half my age. I hate it, it's so annoying. >.<
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Old 07-29-2011, 07:55 AM   #11 (permalink)
 
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Originally Posted by Kon View Post
Very much. I'm intensely afraid of messing up and getting yelled at. Laughed at, wouldn't bother me. I think my fear comes from messing up and getting yelled at since I was little kid. I was slower at picking up stuff at work compared to others and I was very absent-minded/forgetful. I was yelled at by quite a few employers/my parents. When I got yelled at, that would make me screw up even more and then they would get madder at me. I used to lose/forget stuff all the time. But yelling at me didn't solve anything because I'd be so scared of getting yelled at that my mind would go blank. Maybe you got yelled at by parents/educators when you were younger?
Took the words right out of my mouth. It didn't help that at my last job almost all my coworkers didn't speak English.
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Old 07-29-2011, 08:03 AM   #12 (permalink)
 
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Story of my life. My family sees me as this little girl who needs to be protected, especially my dad. And strangers tend to treat me like a child/speak to me condecendingly because I look about 3 years younger than I am. Sucks.
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Old 07-29-2011, 08:16 AM   #13 (permalink)
 
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Sometimes I feel people treat me like a child and disrespect me because I am quiet/nice. It really pisses me off. What gives them the right? I feel so bad because I feel like I can't stand on my own, fight my own battles, like others can.

Yeah people annoy the heck out of me constantly.
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Old 07-29-2011, 09:16 AM   #14 (permalink)
 
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I really dont mind, I just smile at them letting them know in a gesturing like manner that the things they say dont effect me at all. I think it makes them feel awkward
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Old 07-29-2011, 09:37 AM   #15 (permalink)
 
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Yes ._. and it doesn't help that I'm only 5 ft tall, so I appear even more like a child. Random people, some friends, and family have always treated me like I'm below them in some way. ADHD-PI makes me seem like a stupid child too, because I never know what's going on, always late, losing/forgetting things, irresponsible, etc... Haha, ironic that my avatar is a child?
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Old 07-29-2011, 09:45 AM   #16 (permalink)
 
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The tables have gone both ways with me ;

Some people when I was younger 10-15 yrs old found my quietness / able to keep to myself without bugging everyone - maturity / I must of been older. At the age of 12 I had a few people convinced (I was also almost 5'7 ish) ... that I was 17 yrs old!

There are sometimes now that I am almost 18 , no friends keep to myself , no parting shy ... non socially experiences find it 'immature' to not do the things kids are my age... others think I am 24- 26 yrs old ! >.<
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Old 07-29-2011, 09:48 AM   #17 (permalink)
 
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Sometimes I feel people treat me like a child and disrespect me because I am quiet/nice. It really pisses me off. What gives them the right? I feel so bad because I feel like I can't stand on my own, fight my own battles, like others can.
I often feel like people are treating me this way, but I find it hard to stand up to them because I always end up second guessing myself and being like, maybe they don't mean it and I'm just being too sensitive. I am a sensitive person and have been told I overreact to things my whole life, so now it's hard for me to trust my own feelings. it kinda sucks.

like, there's this woman at the post office I go to who always has some rude, condescending thing to say. one day she couldn't stop chortling over how I put two pieces of mail on the scale at once. she just kept going on about how she couldn't read the zip code and you can only do one letter at a time and blah blah. I definitely felt like she was trying to make me feel stupid, but I let it go. then the next time I went in I had to buy 4 stamps for 4 separate letters, and I'm putting the stamps on myself before I paid her and she said something like, "did you give me cash for this yet? man, hurry up! I put stamps on envelopes so fast and you're like struggling with them." I felt like saying well that's because you're a loser postal worker and this is all you have to do with your life, but of course I just smiled and said nothing. I mean, I'm glad I didn't snap and say something that mean, but I do kinda wish I'd at least said something. but I never know what to say so I always just clam up and then brood over it later.
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Old 07-30-2011, 02:57 PM   #18 (permalink)
 
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I think I've got youngest child syndrome. I think I unconsciously behave quite childishly and at times inspire other to treat me as I were a child. I hate it.
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Old 07-30-2011, 03:43 PM   #19 (permalink)
 
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I don't think people mean to be disrespectful, they do it unintentionally, it is like a instinct to react that way to extreme shyness/quietness.
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Old 08-15-2011, 04:35 PM   #20 (permalink)
 
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All the time, I'm very short and look much younger then my age and I feel like a child inside. That's one of the things that hurts the most is not feeling my age on the outside.
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